Categories
Egyéb kategória Life Coaching

Goalsetting Workshop

🎉 SURPRISE!
The Goal Setting 2026 live workshop is coming!

Two dates:
🇭🇺 Hungarian: December 15th 6:00 PM
🇬🇧 English: December 16th 5:00 PM (GMT)

This workshop is an expanded, deeper, practice-oriented version of the free year-end workbook…
And the best part:
🎁 Every participant will receive the 3-in-1 expanded premium workbook for FREE!

Where:
✨ You reevaluate 2025
✨ You let go of what no longer moves you forward
✨ You define your SMART goals for 2026
✨ and close with a ready-made action plan

If you want to start the new year focused and confident →
write a message 💛

Contacts:

email: kriszti.nyers@gmail.com

Facebook Messenger: @krisztina.nyers.3

Categories
Free Santa Mini Workbook❤❤ Life Coaching

Free Workbook

Scroll down for the English version!❤🥰

👇 Itt tudod letölteni: 👇Download for free:

Mikulás Mini Munkafüzet Santa Mini Workbook

Ez az én Mikulás ajándékom Nektek!🥰 

(Magyarul és angolul is elérhető!)
Az idei év végére szerettem volna adni nektek valamit, ami tényleg érték — nem csak egy kedves gesztus.

Ezért készítettem egy ingyenes, letölthető mini munkafüzetet, ami segít tisztábban látni, merre is tartasz… és mit szeretnél 2026-ban.

✨ Egy apró AHA-pillanat a jó irány felé.
✨ Pár egyszerű kérdés, ami meglepően sokat kihoz belőled.
✨ És egy kis évzáró-löket, ami segít fókuszba kerülni.

A legjobb?
Csak pár perc — és tisztábban látsz. 😉

👇 Itt tudod letölteni:


Mikulás Mini Munkafüzet

Fogadd szeretettel, és töltsd ki nyugodtan egy tea vagy forró csoki mellett. 🎁
Ez még csak a kezdete valaminek… de arról majd jövő később mesélek. 😉

This is my Santa Claus gift to you!🥰


At the end of this year, I wanted to give you something that is truly valuable — not just a nice gesture.


That’s why I created a free, downloadable mini workbook that will help you see more clearly where you are headed… and what you want in 2026. truly valuable—


✨ A small AHA moment in the right direction.
✨ A few simple questions that will bring out a surprising amount of you.
✨ And a little end-of-year boost that will help you focus.


The best?
Just a few minutes — and you’ll see more clearly. 😉


👇 You can download it here:

Santa Mini Workbook


Receive it with love and fill it out comfortably with a cup of tea or hot chocolate. 🎁
This is just the beginning of something… but I’ll tell you more about it later. 😉

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

“Big men don’t cry”

Hello Guys,

I hope you are well and enjoying your time and life. Autumn’s colours are beautiful, and from the 1st of November, the Holiday season officially started. 🎄😅

So, I always write from my perspective, drawing on my own experience and that of my closest circle, and my clients are mostly women. Recently (in the past two years), I became the luckiest woman on earth because amazing, lovely and traumatised men surround me. 😅 I love all of them, but it was a huge surprise how much they care about self-development (of course, I’m their best life coach🥰), against all the assumptions, they like and want to talk about their emotions, and what kind of traumas they have. 

All the women’s magazines say that “women are from Venus and men are from Mars”. Yes, we’re so different in a million ways, but what I’ve discovered is how similar we are in our negative feelings, self-destructions or traumas. How they self-sabotage, and we do, it is very similar. And mostly, I want to talk about the beliefs that we share.

Before we start, I want to explain why I think this subject is very crucial. I have many traumas, battling with anxiety and depression, not to mention my ADHD. So I know these things first-hand. I thought I had to wear masks all the time to be loved and accepted. I saw these men around me and I was amazed by their kindness, friendship and how strong they are despite everything they had been through. As I said, I am lucky to be most of the time the only woman around them, so I am more of a “bro” to them than a woman (not for everyone and not always, though), which is absolutely fine with me, but like that, I can hear the “bro talk”. You know every girl would like to be a fly on the wall when their other half is with the guys on a boys’ night out. We think they watch football, have a beer and only talk about their favourite team, other ladies or hobbies. What else can they discuss, because they don’t talk about fashion or their feelings as we do?! At least that’s what we think.

Well, ladies, I have news, your other halves have feelings and they’re talking about it with their friends. Why with them and why not with you? Well, simply because they think they have to be strong in front of you, otherwise you will feel that they are just “crying girls”. This was one of the strongest beliefs that I heard from my friends. Let’s start.

“Big men, don’t cry”

I discussed with the “boys”, and they all said the same: “Boys are not allowed to cry”. Some heard from their fathers or other adults, which makes absolute sense. Old traditions, old wounds, old generational patterns come to the surface. However, what surprised me even more was that,  if no one told them directly, they just “knew” because if they cried when they were kids, other kids started to laugh at them. The conditioning is deeper than I thought. Men from the beginning of time were conditioned to be strong, and crying is a sign of weakness. 

Let me tell you something, crying is a release mechanism in our lives.  That’s how the kids release their frustrations, and this is the best way to let go of the energy that is no longer serving us. A good cry is actually healthy because it releases toxins from our bodies and all negative energy. If you don’t cry, you push back those emotions until you will not be able to handle them, and you will explode…if you are lucky. Researchers proved that if you don’t let go of your toxic emotions, they can pile up and can cause even cancer in your body. Nowadays, the situation is improving, and we allow our men to be emotional and we cherish their soft sides. However, I often see that if a guy is opening up, we as women feel that he is too weak and we cannot see him as a man. It is a circle on both sides. 

Women don’t make this emotional transition easier for the other gender. We want our man to be strong and do the “man’s jobs”, but also help us to clean the house. We want him to talk to us, but not too much because we feel overwhelmed by his problems, too. We want him to catch the spider, but what if he has the same trauma regarding this small animal like we do?! We cannot handle it, because we need to feel safe. Our man has to provide, but spend time with us, but not too much, because we need our own time, help, but don’t be too “womanly”…the list goes on, and on and on.

I think the solution is balance and communication. Like everywhere in life, balance and communication are the keys to a relationship as well. Give and take. That’s the basic. Give them the space to open up, to share. Also, we need to know what we want, then align with that person. Get the qualities, visions, and emotions that we want to receive in a relationship. 

“All men must be a superhero”

Obviously! That’s a must-have recruitment! (And obviously, it’s a huge, fat bullshit! 😅) Have you ever thought about the expectations of our society in a man’s eyes? I mean, we all know that a woman has to be married, have at least 1 kid and a nice career before 30, otherwise she is a spinster and “will die alone”. (Or doesn’t have a pancake from her mother!😅 Sorry, Mom!!!🤣)

But what about the men? Our society isn’t soft on them either. If a man doesn’t have a house, car, wife, at least 1 kid and a salary that can provide for the whole family, he isn’t a man, just some kind of “pathetic loser”. My guys told me that it’s still very essential that, from their salary, they provide for their family and must have a higher salary than their wives, otherwise they cannot feel man enough. If they cannot use the tools to build anything, they think less of themselves. They need to fix the tap and cut all the wood, and be a hunter, or at least go fishing, because that’s so “manly”. 

To be honest, feminism didn’t help either. I’m single and from a village, so I can shovel the snow from the porch, use a screwdriver and put a shelf on my wall, and I’m definitely able to open a jar.🤷‍♀️  But ladies, please, it will not hurt you if you ask them to open that jar, or let them do the IKEA wardrobe without a manual. 😅 I know you don’t mind having your hands dirty, but let them do it, let them be a man (unless they don’t like it when their hands are dirty…well then be a “strong woman” and help- if they ask for it!🤣 Yes, I know such a man!🤣- Sorry!! You know I love you!😅)

“Men don’t have traumas”

Nope, they are not allowed. That’s the women’s privilege. (BS😅)

Let me tell you something, because we are all human beings, we all have been kids at some point in our lives (I know, I know, there are certain people that you cannot believe or imagine that they have ever experienced joy or know what kindness means, but trust me, they were kids. 😉), and like that we all have traumas. You know why? Because every parent makes mistakes. They’re human. Humans make mistakes. Not intentionally, not because they purposely want to screw up their kids’ lives and then pay the therapist for years…no… they are just trying to do their best, because unfortunately for a human baby, we do not get a manual. Babies are not IKEA self that you have a manual and you still can f@ck up. Every parent wants the best for their kid, and they have never been parents before, so it’s the first time they’re doing it. With years, they become better. But they have pasts, too. They have generational traumas that they pass on to you. Not because they want to, but that’s what they’ve got for their parents. Your parents have beliefs from their parents or their own that condition you and your beliefs. Unless you work on yourself, you will pass them to your kids. Or you have siblings, and they just want to joke with you, but they condition you to be scared of spiders for the rest of your life…but because you are a man…well, that’s not cool. Or your parents don’t want to buy a new outfit for the masquerade, and you are a 5-year-old boy and have to wear your older sister’s Madonna costume, and you end up looking like a bad whore  (True story from a friend.😅) …that’s a trauma for life. Yet, your parents just wanted to save some money. 

No one talks about what these things can do for the long term in your life. There are obviously more serious matters, too. For example doesn’t matter your gender when you are born to a family they don’t want you, or maybe they wanted the opposite sex. You start your life as a huge disappointment to your parents, who should love you unconditionally. That’s a trauma for a life which is not gender specific. Not to mention when your teachers criticise you for something, or they give you the bad boy stamp. And we haven’t discussed the teenager dramas, the loss of the first love. I could write about the type of traumas for days. 

The conclusion is that until you become a 30-40-year-old man, you are fully insecure, don’t have self-confidence (but you will pretend like you don’t have tomorrow), you feel useless, incompetent and unworthy, which most of the men (and women) avoid, so start to use substances (or the women sometimes begin to became the gossip channel), everything just not to face the problems. 

So yes, men are traumatised too. Everyone should accept that fact and be more empathetic with others. Plus, I have some bad news…if you don’t face your problems, nothing will get better…but it can always get worse.

So, doesn’t matter if you are a man or a woman. We are all human beings trying to do our best on this planet called Earth. We have more in common than we even can imagine. Listen to the guys as well. Listen and know that they have their own burdens and emotions, and let them show you the soft side, too. And guys, please let us know more; show us your emotional side too, so we can understand you better. 

No one has to be always strong to be a Hero.😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Please follow me here, on Instagram, Facebook, or Pinterest.

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

Summary of a Summer,

aka Painkillers and Distractions

Hello guys,

I hope you’re well and had an amazing Summer. I had one of a kind. And that’s exactly the subject for this time.🥰

Usually, Summer is my “battery charger”. My friends and loved ones often tell me that I’m working with solar energy. So, if the sun is shining, I’m happy and conquer the World at least 2 times per hour, but if not, it’s like someone unplugged me. That’s true most of the time, and that’s why I didn’t realise the fall. The worst part is that this period started last Spring, but I was so busy to realise that I’ve started to “use painkillers” and “distractions”, just to make sure I don’t have to deal with the “serious things”. What does it mean? I’ll explain.

Usually, I don’t like to talk about these kinds of things. Who likes to talk about their failures and falls? Yepp, no one. Especially if you’re in the care industry. But I think that’s why it’s important to tell you about my journey. 

So, if you know me, you know that I’m always busy, full of energy, very positive, cheerful, but a tough, strong and badass woman. Which is true, but what only a few of you know is that I’m so emotional and hopeless romantic. I’m a born empath, and that can be a blessing and a curse, too. I’m loyal till the end, I love with all my heart, I can be excited about anything, and that’s why I have high hopes and expectations. I thought I had learnt to get the balance, but the Universe proved that I’m so far from it. 

I’m always so high in the clouds or so low down in Hell. No middle ground. Last summer, I felt I was in balance. I felt zen and happy. That was the illusion. A lovely and so high period. I loved every minute of it and I haven’t regretted anything. So I had the same expectations for this summer, too. But Life happened. I wanted to do what I did last summer, but life hit me hard, so I had to see what I was actually doing.

I kept myself busy, but not because I had that many things to do, but because I didn’t want to face the fact that I started to please everyone around me again, just to keep the (now I know, it was only an illusion) peace. I tried to be perfect in every aspect of my life. Perfect look, style, student, employee, friend, daughter, aunt, sister, etc. You name it and I’ve done it. I’ve tried so hard to be everywhere, to “make” everyone happy. And that’s where I started to use “pankillers” and “distractions”. 

What were those? Fun! I went to parties, I met friends, I was even a fangirl on a bench for a whole summer, just to feel alive, everything but facing the fact that I started to feel tired. It was much easier to listen to other people’s problems and help them than help myself. I didn’t know what I was doing. I just felt okay and good. When I had some bad days, instead of sitting down and checking what the lesson is, what I am doing, I used one of my lovely distractions. I called a friend, went to the beach or sat and listened to my favourite songs from one of the kindest singers I know. Don’t get me wrong, I love helping others, I never regret a minute of last summer, and I had a really fun time, but that lifestyle wasn’t sustainable, nor aligned with my plans.  

Last Fall, things started to fall apart, but as you know, I had my exams, so I just thought that everything was about the stress regarding the study. I believed, once I finished, I would have what I wanted, because I worked so hard for it, and everything would be calm again, just like in summer, and I could focus again on the things that “made” me happy. But nothing went according to plan, and I hit rock bottom. I was so high on positive energy, so I hit the ground so hard. But hey, I’m fine! I think that should be on my gravestone: “I’m fine!”😅 “I’m fine, and this is just a bump on the road!” “I’ve got this!”- Yep, all the cliches. And all the toxic positivity.

People think that these are enough to open someone’s eyes. Well, it’s a good thing that I’m so stubborn, like a dog with a bone, so I didn’t let go, no sit down, self-reflect…noooo…that’s not me. 😅 I shook myself, fixed my crown and continued the same journey. I didn’t realise what I was doing even during Christmas time. I love that time of the year, and I was just tired. I was exhausted from shopping, being on the go, running all the time, and juggling everything. Lessons with my students, working on the website, planning for next year, being who everyone wants you to be, but in the end, no one was happy with me or the things I‘ve done. I wanted nothing, just to sit on that bench and be summer again. 

The New Year started lovely, with another “painkiller”, but it felt good, so I gathered energy to go on, and I put all my energy into the life coaching. I was high, on the top again. I’ve met amazing and inspiring people who have helped me a lot. By summer arrived, I was so happy and proud. My students gave me so much love, and I’m so proud of all of them. But students finished, the summer hit, and everyone went on holiday. So I couldn’t be as busy as I wanted to be. 

I honestly thought about the distractions, but after May, I realised that it would be lovely, but if I continue like this, I cannot pull my head out of the sand. 

So this summer, I’ve done what I least wanted to do: I faced my fears and flaws. I’ve been sitting instead of a bench and listening to someone else (whom I wanted to listen to so badly), I was sitting in my bed or on the beach and listening to myself. It was so hard… I’m not very kind to myself, but better with others. 😅 I hit rock bottom during the process and found out things that I’ve buried so deep down, I didn’t remember that I’ve ever felt them. I re-created my boundaries because some of them were so outdated. Even I realised that time to time boundaries need to be bent or rethought. I had to accept a million things about myself and others who are so close to me. Also, I had to let go of people who were part of my life forever, but did not fit in anymore. I was disappointed more times than I can count. I felt like going back and distracting myself would be easy, but I had to “come off the painkillers” to be who I am, to move on and be calm, balanced and be happy without anyone’s approval or validations from outside of me. Now I am in a place where I am not just saying that I am fine, I honestly feel it. I still have work to do, but I am happy, without any distractions. 

It sucks!!! Trust me, it was harder than anything, but now I know my value. I know who I am and I know my worth. I don’t want to settle for less anymore, just to feel alive. If someone wants me in their life, they have to treat me as a priority and not an option. Anyone…friends, family, love, anyone. I understand the people around me, I understand where they come from, which wounds they have and why they do things the way they do. I do understand all of these things. But if I make an effort to understand them, I want them to make the same effort for me. Or the bare minimum, is that leave me alone. What you give, you get back. 

The point is that life without expectations is nice, but no one can do that. Even if you don’t expect anything from others, you expect them not to expect anything from you. And that’s a catch-22. 😉 

I think what I wanted to tell you in the end is that it’s okay to fail, it’s okay to rebuild from the ground up, it’s fine to make mistakes, but check your painkillers and distractions, so you can change your life for good. As soon as you start looking for these things and start to do the work, as soon as your life will change too, and you can be the one you want to, or meant to be. Fun is a good thing and has as much as you need, just make sure that this fun is not toxic, not because you want to hide something, not just a distraction, but pure joy. I can have fun now without using it as a cover for deep wounds. 

Enjoy the last days of summer, have fun and be yourself, no matter what. Spitfire up, and if you can’t, just sit on a bench and look inside. It’s worth it! And you are never alone. I am here for you, and I am so proud of you! If you need help, just drop a message and we will figure it out together!😘

Oh, and please don’t forget: You don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Please follow me here, on Instagram, Facebook, or Pinterest.

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Egyéb kategória Life Coaching

Life Coaching

Scroll down for the English version!😘

Ha szeretnéd elérni a kitűzött célodat, ha elakadtál, ha nem tudsz dönteni, vagy ha kihívásokkal nézel szembe, keress bizalommal!

11 évig éltem Londonban. Ez  idő alatt nagyon sokat tapasztaltam és láttam különböző emberek életéből. Mindig is úgy gondoltam, hogy az ember több, mint ami a felszínen látszik. A london-i éveim alatt rengeteg különböző vallású, kultúrájú és gondolkodású emberrel találkoztam. Rengeteg ember életébe leltem betekintést, de ami a közös volt bennük az az, hogy mindenki elakadt az életében legalább egyszer valamiben. Munka, pályaválasztás, párkapcsolat, család, pont ahogy én is. Mindenki a saját céljáért küzdött. Egészen kicsi korom óta tudom, hogy emberekkel szeretnék foglalkozni, embereknek szeretnék segíteni.

Voltak olyan időszakok az életemben, amikor még nem láttam pontosan, hogy hogyan is fog ez megvalósulni. 8 éve foglalkozom önismerettel. 2017-ben találkoztam először a coachinggal és azt éreztem, hogy rátaláltam a valódi utamra. Sajnos önbizalomhiány miatt nem foglalkoztam vele eddig hivatásszerűen, de az elmúlt évben rengeteg embernek segítettem azzal amit én is megtanultam és az ő megerősítésük miatt olvasod most ezeket a sorokat. Úgy döntöttem belevágok, mert tudom, hogy tudok segíteni.

Amikor éppen nem dolgozom, akkor vagy új hobbit tanulok, sétálok, jógázok, mindfullnesst gyakorlok, meditálok, barátnőimmel nevetgélek, családommal vagyok, vagy éppen egy olyan könyvet olvasok, aminek a segítségével még jobban tudok majd Neked segíteni.

Hogyan zajlik a coaching folyamat?

A coaching folyamatban azon dolgozunk, hogy a Téged épp most foglalkoztató, megoldandó kérdéseket közösen más megvilágításba helyezzük, új lehetőségeket tárjunk fel, és megtaláld a kívánt megoldás felé vezető utat/utakat. A Coaching nem terápia, nem én adom a kezedbe a megoldásokat, csak segítek megtalálni azokat különböző technikák segítségével. Nem a múltat elemezzük, hanem az aktuális probléma megoldására koncentrálunk. 

Milyen kérdésekben kérheted a segítségemet?

  • Általános életvezetés
  • Magánélet
  • Élet szervezéssel, személyes hatékonysággal kapcsolatos kérdések.
  • Valódi hivatás megtalálása.
  • Munka/szabadidő egyensúlyával kapcsolatban.
  • Bizonytalanság adott élethelyzetben, nehéz döntési helyzetek.

Foglalás az Elérhetőségek menűpontban vagy kattints ide!🥰

Life Coaching

If you want to reach your goals, feel stuck in your life, cannot decide, or are facing a challenging time, please contact me.

I lived in London for 11 years. During this time I saw and experienced a lot from different types of people’s lives. I always believed that a person is much more than what you can see on the surface. During my time in London, I had the privilege of being in touch with people from different cultures, religions, and mindsets, but they had one thing in common. All of them had struggled at least once in their life, just like me. Work, relationships, purpose searching, family, etc. Everyone battled for their dreams. Since I was a kid, I knew that I wanted to work with people, I wanted to help them.

I had periods in my life when I had no idea how I would do this. I started my self-development journey. In 2017 I met Life Coaching and I knew I had found my true calling. Unfortunately, a lack of confidence, I didn’t start this as my career. But during the last year, I helped so many people in my life with the knowledge I have gathered during my self-development journey. Because of these people’s support and their confirmations, you can read this. I decided to give this a try because I know I can help!

When I am not working, I study a new hobby, take a long walk, practice yoga and mindfulness, meditate, laugh with my friends, spend time with my family or read a book that can help me to help you. 

 How does the coaching process work?

In the coaching process, we work together to put the issues that are currently bothering you and need to be resolved in a different light, explore new possibilities, and find the path(s) leading to the desired solution. Coaching is not therapy; I do not give you solutions, and I only help you find them using different techniques. We do not analyse the past but focus on solving the current problem.

What questions can you ask for my help with?

  • General lifestyle
  • Private life
  • Questions related to life organisation, and personal effectiveness.
  • Finding a real calling.
  • Regarding work/leisure balance.
  • Uncertainty in a given life situation, difficult decision-making situations.

Booking is under the Contact page or click here!

Thank you!!!!😘

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

“Mirror, mirror on the wall…”

Hello Lovelies,

I know each one of you is now confused about this sentence. And that’s okay. 😅 I’ll explain it very soon. First, I wanted to let you know that the website is still in progress with the Life Coach and Motivational speech options, but it will be available soon. Until then, if you need help because you are stuck in your life and have no idea what to do, you can contact me on the social media platforms below. Feel free to drop me a message and I am happy to help! 🥰

However, I have something to share with you. I had a conversation last week (well, not one) that just stuck in my brain or actually, the fact that the person I advised never heard about the “Mirror technique or affect”. Maybe you never heard of that or do not fully understand what it means. Don’t worry, my mentor and very good friend talked to me about the “Mirror” for years while I finally realised its true meaning. Anyway, this is one of the easiest life-changing techniques I have ever heard. “Everyone in your life is a mirror!” But is it true?🤔

Here is the good news: yes and no! But first, we need to clarify other things. Everyone who is around us is a mirror. Their behaviour, skills, and emotions resonate with our frequency. Everyone and everything has a frequency and that’s how we attract people or stuff in our life. Based on our rezonation we choose our friends, relationships even our work. Most of the time we have either a positive or negative vibe. But how is it attached to the mirror? 

For example, you have a friend, who is always complaining, that nothing is good, but he/she pretends that everything is fine. In the beginning, you became friends because you were on the same frequency. (Sorry, but that’s the harsh truth.) If you don’t start to look at him or her as a mirror, you are not bothered. You are the same, it is a beautiful relationship, but neither of you understands why things are always “bad”. Then you start to read my blog, do the tricks and hacks, I share and your frequency starts to rise and you feel more positive, you attract positive people and one day, you just release that the friend we mentioned previously became so annoying. You don’t understand what happened, but you don’t want to spend time with him or her. You feel overwhelmed after every coffee you share. And here the “mirror” comes. Why this person bothers me? What is in his/her behaviour that makes me uncomfortable? Most of the time they say that you changed and you are the one who is annoying and unreliable. You start to see that this person is gossiping all the time, negative and nothing is good. And that’s the point where you have to stop and look in the mirror. Because if it bothers you means you have something to do with those things. They reflect your behaviour and actions. Are you complaining all the time? Do you like gossiping? Are you happy and satisfied with your life? 

If the answer is yes to all those questions, you have to start working on yourself and find the root cause of your behaviour. Because no one can make you feel anything. Your feelings are yours and yours only. So if someone’s behaviour bothers you most likely you act in the same way. Maybe you think that your life is perfect, but you still find things about to complain. Why? Where do those feelings come from?

But if the answer is no to the questions, means that you have nothing to do with the other person’s actions. They are not the reflection of you. Simply they can have a bad day and they reflect their frustration on you. Or you may outgrow them. Your frequency no longer matches theirs. Maybe they are jealous of your success or the things you achieved. Or you envy them about something. 

I also advise my “clients”, the people I work with in their self-development, to first stop and take a breath. Look at the person who said or done the things that are bothering them. Is this person truly important enough to me? Even if the answer is no, the next questions are mandatory. Is this true? Do I act the way they say? If the answer is no to both questions, well you have nothing to do with the situation. But if it is yes, you have to ask other questions. Why this thing bothers me? What do I feel? Where do these feelings come from? Why do I behave this way? Can I change? Do I want to change?

After we find the answers to all those questions, we’ll be able to start to work on the solutions. No matter what you are working on, the first step is always to identify the problem. Once it is done, you need to know the root cause to start working on the strategy that leads you to the full solution. 

One more thing I wanted to tell you. Even if you sort out one problem in your life, others will come. Life never stops happening. Sometimes the same problems come back in a different form and you have to start the process again. You have to look in the mirror and do everything again from the beginning. Our behaviours, reactions, and patterns are not something that we were born with. We learnt them during our years on Earth. If you are 35 years “young” just like me, you have done something in a way in the past 35 years. That behavior will not gone in two, three, four, etc. weeks just because you work on it once. Self-development is a lifelong process. Each behaviour, emotion or pattern change depends on the person, the circumstances, the time, the environment, etc. Some of them we can get rid of in two weeks, but the deeper ones need much more time. You created them in 35 years, so they will not disappear in a second.

And yes, sometimes you need help. You need a person who can see you from the outside. Someone who just sits and listens to you without judgment, in a safe environment, where you can be yourself and everything is about you and your process. So many people said, “Why need a therapist or life coach when I have friends?” well, true, but your friends need to talk about themselves too. Most of the time they don’t want to hurt your feelings and that’s why they are not honest. They cannot see you objectively, because they are involved in your life. Plus they desperately want to help and give you all the cliche pieces of advice. Come on we all heard at least once in our life after a break up that “He wasn’t good enough for you. It’s his loss. Just let go.” Thank you, Einsteins!!!! Seriously, no kidding Sherlock?! 🙄That’s why sometimes we need help from outside of our circle.

The “mirror” technique is the best way to see ourselves. If the other person in the mirror is not who we want to see, well, we have a chance to change. But we always need to stop first and check who is the one who said that thing and what they say, because there is a possibility that we are their mirror and not the other way around. When I first heard about this, I started to monitor all my interactions with other people and I got terrified about myself. Some of them were true. I was arrogant, selfish, hysterical, bitchy, judgemental, critical, etc. And some of them had nothing to do with me. But because I heard that “Everyone is a mirror”, I started to believe that I am a terrible person. Now I know that there are moments when you are the mirror to the other person.

One last thing is crucial to talk about. Not just everyone, but everything is a mirror. So if you say that someone around you does something that you do not agree with, either you envy that thing or you do it the same way. Life/Universe/God wants to show you one of your core beliefs. Let’s say that your friend has so much money and you think, it’s easy for him or her because… Now here it is. Mirror. I want that money that easy, so I am jealous, but my core belief is that I must work hard to get a little bit of money. Or when you say “money just comes and goes” and you are surprised that the money goes all the time… Honey, of course, it goes, because you never said that it stays. See what I mean? Your friend’s lifestyle and the fact that you want this showed you the block in your life.

It’s hard to look in the mirror because shows us the truth about ourselves. But trust me it’s worth it. As soon as you accept that you are not perfect and never will be, you can start the work to become the person you want to be. You can be anyone if you want to and if you work for it. Achieving our biggest dreams is never easy, but nothing is impossible. 

As Audrey Hepburn said: “Nothing is impossible, the word itself says: I’m-Possible.”

I hope it helps you to SpitFire up, look in the mirror with pride and adore the person inside of it because everyone is imperfectly perfect. I honestly love you all!!! ❤

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Please follow me here, on Instagram, Facebook, or Pinterest.

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

5 steps to gather the courage to start something new

Hello Guys,

I hope you are well and not too depressed because of the cold weather.

As I mentioned, I have a new project and you will see it very soon. The website will be updated and I will add my Life Coach and Motivational speaker services. Why and why now? Excellent questions!😅

I created this blog because I wanted to help people and because sometimes I have to give out what is inside me. 

Since I was a kid I knew I wanted to work with people and help them. But for so long I had no idea how can I do that. In 2021 I’ve met coaching and I knew this was my way. However, a lack of confidence held me back until now. Like so many of you, I questioned myself and never imagined that people would ask my opinion or why anyone would choose me to help. Who am I? Just a no one! A small village girl with a big mouth!😅 Plus what my parents and friends will say? Come on, I will only embarrass them. I was afraid, I would end up alone and no one would support or love me. So I have done nothing. 

During the past 1,5 years, I helped friends with their divorce, strangers and teenagers with their lack of self-confidence, friends with their everyday life problems and many issues. I have done it for free because I wanted to help. Even though I am only 35 years “young”, I have been through a lot. My motivation is to give some value to the people in my life. That’s the whole purpose of this blog too. If I can help only one of you with my words, it was worth it. 

So the people around me who I helped told me that I gave so much to them, why am I not doing it as a career? Well, I felt I was an impostor. I learnt those techniques and tools from other people. People who are more famous, smart and successful than I am. Motivational speakers such as Mel Robbins, Jenna Kutcher, Dean Graziozi, Roxy Nafusi, Almási Kitti and the list goes on and on. 

But recently I listened to Mel Robbins’ podcast  (I know, sorry, I adore this woman. 😅)and she said that this is just insecurity and we have to face our fear. If someone has done it, everyone can do it. And that’s just hit me on my face. I write about self-confidence here and I didn’t take my advice. 

So I started to do her Let Them theory (btw she published the book you can buy here. No, I don’t get any commission for this, I just love the theory and it works for me.😅) which by the way I wrote about it here. As Mel advises everyone, I let people judge me. I let people misunderstand me. I let people think what they want to think about me. And I let me don’t care. I let myself do what I want to do. It let me live my life the way I want to. I let myself help people in my way if that makes me feel good and happy. I am forever grateful for this woman because she changed my life so many times in many ways, and I hope you let me help change yours. 

Based on her lessons and many others in the past more than 10 years since I started to study motivation, mindfulness and self-development, I created my “system” to start working on my goals. These steps helped me to start so many things and I follow them now to create the life coaching/motivational speaker side of my life. 

So here are my 5 steps on how I gathered the courage to start something new (again😅):

  1. Identify the “problem”. In my case, the problem was my people-pleasing. I thought too much about what other people would say, do or think about me. I was paralysed by the fact that some of my friends and family members would turn back on me.
  1. Work on yourself and overcome the fear. This is where I used the Let Them theory. I let go of the negative thoughts, feelings and self-talk. I kept telling myself that I let them react how they want to react and let me be myself. I started to catch my negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones. I accepted my fears, but I didn’t let these feelings keep me from taking action.
  1. Identify your goal. What do I want? I wrote everything down in very itemised and specific ways. You must be clear and 100% sure about the “what you want” part, otherwise it’s not a goal, it’s just a dream. You must declare your goal. Have to have a clear vision. In my case, I wrote down that I am a “professional” life coach/motivational speaker and how many clients I have per week. (Be careful with the words and make sure you speak like it already happened.)
  1. Have a strategy. I researched life coaching businesses, their websites and social media accounts to get ideas of what and how to do. What are the steps? What do I need? How can I be seen? What kind of content and posts should I create? How my website should look like? Who do I need to speak with?
  1. Take a small step. As I mentioned earlier, my website is not done, yet, but I made my first step. And it was to reach out to an amazing human with a huge heart, who is helping me to edit my site. Yes, sometimes the first step is to ask for help. In life, there are only a few things that you can achieve alone. You need other people’s help to get the success you wish. I am lucky enough to have wonderful people around me and I am forever grateful for them. 

I truly believe these steps simply because they worked for me in the past on several different occasions. And I hope they will work for you too. During a life coach session, we will go through these steps (and many more) and basically, I will hold your hands on your way to achieve what you want. These 5 steps are only the beginning of a long road to success. As I said, at the moment the service is in progress, but if you don’t want to miss it when it’s up and running, or you have any questions, please follow me on the social media platforms or the blog (links below the post). 😘 The blog will be only in English in the future too. However, the life coach section will be available both in English and Hungarian. (That’s one of the reasons why it is not up and running yet! It’s so hard to live a bilingual life! 😅)

So please give it a try to my “magic steps”, SpitFire” up and have fun while you become more confident than you can ever imagine! 😘

Oh, and please don’t forget: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Please follow me here, on Instagram, Facebook, or Pinterest.

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

10 easy steps before 2025!

Hello, hello

I hope you are having fun in the Christmas markets and getting ready for the holiday season. Well, I am. 😅 But while this time of the year is about Christmas and love, we should not forget another big celebration: New Year’s Eve! When I was a kid, I was so excited when the countdown started because I thought once the clock hit midnight, something wonderful would happen, and magically, I would have a new life. Year by year I stood beside my parents with my champagne (of course non-alcoholic) and waited for the magic which never happened. As I got older I realised that only because the year changes on the calendar nothing will change. We have to work for it. No one has a magic wand. The changes start with you.

While I enjoy the advent vibe, I also summarise the past 12 months. You cannot create anything new without cleaning the old. We all know that we have to make space for the new in our life. First, you must be honest with yourself and organise the good and the bad. What and who do you want to keep in your life and what are the things or people you have to let go to have a fresh start? I do this usually every quarter, but before New Year’s Eve, I create a list of things I have achieved and a list of what I must release. This is hard because you have to be brutally honest with yourself. I have an amazing exercise to close the year and set up the new goals for the next. It’s only 10 steps, but it has so much power.

  1. Grab a piece of paper and on the left side write down everything that went bad or gave you discomfort. I start with the so-called negative aspects of my life because these are the things I have to release. These things will give you tears and make you feel sad, disappointed and sometimes angry. Take a day when you focus on these things and feelings. Feel everything. Even if it’s hard. Cry, if must, but don’t hold anything back.
  1. The next day write down in the middle of the paper every lesson you have learnt. Every small and big realisation about yourself, the people you love, situations, career, money, etc. Every situation that you think it was a lesson. Then sit with them for the rest of the day.
  1. Finally, on the third day write down everything that you are grateful for the past year. Same as with the negatives or with the lessons, write down every big or small thing. And sit with it for a day or two or as long as you need.
  1. Summarise. What you could do better? What do you want to let go (or who)? What do you want to keep? What is still important?
  1. Once these are done, I want you to take an empty paper and write down all the things you want to achieve during the next year. Everything. Every big and small goal. No matter what comes to your mind just write it down on the paper. The number one rule: be honest with yourself. Don’t rush. This can take days. Have fun with it. Imagine that you have all the time and money in the world… what do you want?
  1. Whenever you feel you are ready with the list categorise the items. Here are some examples of categories: family and relationships, money, career, health, self-development, spirituality, fun, wellness, etc. 
  1. Once you have your categories, choose a maximum of three items from each category. The three that are the most important to you. (If you have difficulties choosing then use the “7 Whys Method” for each goal you wrote on your paper. You grab the item and ask seven times in writing why you want that.) Now you have your list of goals for the next 12 months.
  1. The most important thing is to take a small step towards each goal. One small thing. Ask yourself  “What can I do NOW to get…?” And do it. If you want to get healthier, for example, you can grab an apple right now and eat it. If you want to go to Italy next summer, stand up and get some money from your wallet and put it in the “Italian vacation” jar. Doesn’t matter what, but do one thing right away, so your brain attaches the list with success and doesn’t get overwhelmed by the amount of work you’ll have to do during the next year to achieve all the goals you wrote.
  1. Now that we have the list and made the first step, we have another very important thing to do: schedule follow-ups. Most people have New Year resolutions but they never achieve even the 3% of the list, only because they forget the list exists.  So to avoid failure schedule a day every month when you look at goals and decide what to do next or just check the process. Look at where you are and what is still accurate or what is not so important after all. (Remember that we are changing. Some of the goals were important in January, but while we go deeper into the year, so many things happen with us and some of the items on our paper will became less important and others will be priorities.) 
  1. The last bit is to divide the goals by the 12 months. The human brain cannot focus million things at once. If you try to do that and achieve everything in 30 days, you get overwhelmed, burn out and give up. Nobody can conquer the world in one day. So be wise and divide. May to achieve some of the goals you need help, or you can do them only in the Summer or Winter time. Think and organize.

I know that all of you are so happy and proud of your list and so excited about the next year, but one thing you never forget: let it go. I know you have the perfect list and the perfect plan, why should you let go? Because life happens. Always. And if you are so stubborn and don’t let Life/God/Universe give you a better option it will be a very hard year with so much suffering. Everything is happening for a reason and you get everything you want and what meat for you at the right time. Not sooner, not later. Enjoy the process, enjoy the ride that we call life. Because if you do, much better things can come into your life than the ones you just wrote on that paper. Please keep in mind that the goals are only guides, not rules. 

Here are some of my goals for 2025:

  • Eat healthier. Less sugar and more green. (Even though I will never be a salad girl! 😅)
  • Exercise more (daily walk and pilates, plus dance is fine, but I want to ride my bicycle more often and go hiking or have Zumba back into my life.)
  • Post often on the blog
  • Keep being the best auntie possible. 😎 And spend more time with my family.

These are my main priorities for 2025. I hope these give you some ideas. 😘

SpitFire up and face all your fears and failures. Create your dream list and enjoy the ride!😘But most importantly: Have Fun!!!!!🥰

Oh, and please don’t forget: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Follow me here, on Instagram, Facebook, or Pinterest.

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

Change your perspective

Hello Guys,

I hope you are having fun and starting to feel the Christmas spirit. Okay, I know, maybe some of you are not that much of a fan of the holidays. (Doesn’t matter I still love you all Grinches.😝) Advent season is my favourite, but staying alone under the mistletoe does not make me happy either…until now. Not because I finally kissed the right frog and became a prince…no. 😅 But something happened and changed my perspective. And that’s what I want to talk about—changing perspective.

Usually, I go to sleep quite early, but a couple of days ago I couldn’t fall asleep. So I started to dumb scroll my social media and found a video that made me think and changed my view of everything, especially my relationship status. I know, it’s a shame on me that I did not save the video or even remember the guy’s profile, but he said that every time he feels blue because he is single, he starts to imagine that what if next year this time he will be in a relationship and he will have a fight with the love of his life and he just wishes to be single again. So basically he said that he enjoys every minute of his single life because you never know when The One comes and maybe he wants to have back his life alone. Bumm!!! Hit me in the face! I have never thought about my life like this. He has done nothing just shifted the focus. 

So I started to think. I love the holidays, the decorations, the Christmas markets, the lights, smells, foods, songs (especially the songs😅), buying gifts and all the advent vibe. BUT! As a single person when Christmas Eve came and I stood alone in the mistletoe, I felt so lonely and disappointed. Even if I was with my amazing family and friends, I felt that something was wrong with me. Of course, I knew that I was fine and this was just a period of my life. Usually, when this emotion hits I start to tell myself The List (all the things only a single can do) and it helps, but this video hit me so hard. Because I thought I was positive and handled this whole “magical love is all around” thing well, but I just used toxic positivity and covered my emotions with my little list. Plus I haven’t enjoyed the last couple of Christmases as much as I could because I was too focused on the fact that I’m “alone”. I couldn’t appreciate the fact that how much I wasn’t alone. The fact that how lucky I was and I am because I have a wonderful family, both my parents are alive and healthy, and I have the best nephews ever, plus year by year I have more people I can call friends. My head was in my ass and that video finally pulled it out. I talk about gratitude here, but I wasn’t grateful at all. But that’s okay. I’ll not punish myself because I’m only a human…I’m not perfect, but I’m truly grateful that I realised these things before it’s too late. 

Don’t get me wrong, I still wish to have someone in my life who I can call my own but from now on I enjoy the advent even if I am alone because I never know when that prince finally find his white horse and rides to me. It’s good to have someone but as a single woman I do not have to play puzzle with the time and make sure that we visit his family and mine too. Plus you guys know exactly how this works…the day is good for you it’s not good for your brother’s family and the dates that are good for his family are not good for yours, and all the parents want the same date and everything is just like a business schedule. 😅🙄Not to mention the struggle with the gifts and the cooking/baking procedure. Instead, of all these hustles I go to my parent’s house before Christmas and I’ll only move from my favourite armchair when I have to eat… probably I’ll even sleep in it. 🤷‍♀️🤣 I do not have to go outside in the cold and visit anyone else. No expectations.

Everything has a bright side. So many times we don’t see it or don’t want to see it. Not always easy to find the light in the dark, I know, but there is. Always. I don’t talk about the fake positivity. If something is sucks, it’s sucks. We have to feel it but after we give it out we should change our perspectives otherwise life will just go by and in the end, we have no idea how we end up there where we will be. So many times we think we have time, but after all those years I just realised what it means that we only have the present. 

Christmas is just one thing where you can use his method. And this is not just for singles. Think about it. For example, if you really wish to have a kid, but somehow doesn’t happen instead of you becoming depressed and anxious, you can shift your focus. Like my best friend did. (P.S. She is one of the strongest women on Earth!🥰) She used the same technique without knowing she did. Now she enjoys the time with her husband and appreciates every moment. They travel a lot because they never know when the kid comes and obviously after that, they will not be able to go for a long weekend just for the 2 of them. Was it easy for her? Hell No! But it was worth it because she is glowing now. They don’t give up on the kid, but until the little angel arrives they enjoy life as it is.

Another example is if you want to change your job or find one, instead of crying and complaining, just shift your perspective. Send your CVs and cover letters but in the meantime enjoy the fact that you do not have to wake up early or dress up. You can go for a walk whenever you want or stay home and read a book. Try to enjoy these things while you search for a “perfect job” because very soon you have to go to work and maybe you will not be this free for years.

Don’t get me wrong I talked about this here in the blog but in a different view and I thought I used the focus shift and I did but never about my relationship status. 😅 But now this hit me so hard. The most important is that you never give up on what you want but until you get it trust God/Universe/The process (however you want to call it) and focus on the millions of miracles around you. Because doesn’t matter who says what, you are a miracle. Everything and everyone around us is a miracle and if we start to see Life from a different angle it delivers our dreams. But if you keep whinging about the things you do not have, guess what? You will never have them. 

So SpitFire up and look at your life from a different perspective. It’s worth it!😘

Oh, and please don’t forget: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Follow me here, on Instagram, Facebook, or Pinterest.

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

Kings and Queens

Hello Guys,

I know, you are so surprised to have me again in such a short time. Don’t get used to it, but this subject has been on my mind for weeks and finally decided to come out.😅 So what you will read is about gender roles and their changes. Don’t worry I will not lecture or do a whole history class just my (and some wonderful ladies’) opinion. Like always, you can agree, disagree and please question everything I say.

A couple of weeks ago, I had a class (not about gender roles, but when a bunch of fantastic women sit together on a Saturday afternoon, anything can happen), and we started talking about fairy tales and how important they are for the kids’ growth. (I study pedagogy now.)Of course, when you talk about fairy tales and are a woman in your 30s, 40s, or 50s, you first think about Disney movies. And here is where all the magic started to happen.👸

100 years ago women had only one role: stay home and wait for their prince, he would sort out everything. Translation: women don’t have the right to vote or go to work, god forbids them even thinking about studying. I’m sure every one of you saw those commercials from the ‘50,’60 and ‘70 America where they display how should look like and behave a perfect wife. (if you are interested in this subject, watch the movie Monalisa’s Smile with Julia Roberts.) In Hungary was a bit different but not so much. Men went to work gave the money to their wives and in return, the love of their life did all the housework and took care of the kids. There were men’s jobs and women’s jobs and life was happy. And fairy tales based on this ideology. 

Look at Sleeping Beauty! She falls asleep, waits until the prince has done all the work, and finally shows up and kisses her. The best life ever! (By the way, I can be the best Sleeping Beauty, I love sleeping and it would be much better to pass my time via sleeping and wait for the goddamn price to kiss me than work and stress and save myself every single day!😉) Or Snowwhite! Come on! Same story. Okay with more poison, apples and dwarfs, but she waits while her prince fights the battles. – Little Mermaid, Cinderella, etc. The list goes on and on with the same theory. Girls have to do nothing while their men do all the work. They just have to be beautiful, doesn’t even have to say a single word. (It is even preferable to shut up and just be.) Was it good? Well,  it depends on who you ask, but in my opinion, it wasn’t good like this. (And we all agreed on it in my class.)

 But honestly, that was inherited from our parents and grandparents. I remember a conversation with my beloved grandma. I introduced my (ex) boyfriend to her and asked him to bring me my coffee. My grandma was so upset about MY behaviour and she told me that I could lose the guy if I didn’t start to act like a proper woman. I asked her what she meant and she told me that a woman’s job is to take care of her man and give everything to him, not the other way around.  And she did. I remember when Granny died we didn’t find Grandpa’s socks and he had no idea where they were because Granny prepared his outfit for the day every morning. She gave him breakfast, lunch, dinner, and coffee, and cleaned his clothes. She took care of the whole house. That’s how our parents were raised: men’s jobs and women’s jobs. But what about nowadays?

Look at the fairy tales. Merida…no need for a man, she handles everything. Rapunzel… she has a prop, Flint who helps her, but she does most of the work. Elsa…no man at all, but she is the hero. And that’s what our life looks like. Women became Heros. Life has changed a lot. Now women study, have lovely careers and don’t need a man. The world turned upside down. Women are more masculine than men. We struggle because society still wants us to do the “women’s jobs”, but get a degree first and have around the same amount of money that your man takes home. If you are single you get a stamp that you are a careerist, ambitious, and too strong. And because our men have become more feminine they are “scared” of a strong woman. Why scared? Well, a strong and independent woman is her own Hero. She doesn’t need to be saved or rescued anymore. A strong woman doesn’t need a man…but wants one badly. So she kisses millions of frogs until she finds her prince and doesn’t wait for the one. (I would be so grateful if someone just let me know the exact amount of frogs that should kiss because I’m f@cking tired of kissing the animals.🤷‍♀️) But what is the problem?

Communication! I had a discussion with my friend and mentor. She told me an interesting theory and she is right. So we talked about gender differences and how we feel as single women (she is a single mother too). We agreed that the main issue is the lack of communication. If we look at our lives we can see that we are afraid to speak up because of the “what ifs”. 

“What if they do not like me if I say such and such?” “What if my boss fires me and I do not have a job and I have to find another place (which by the way you wanted to do a million years ago because it is a sh@twhole, but you are too lazy to take the time and energy to get another one.)” “What if the guy will never call or text me back if I say honestly that I do not like his style or how he treats me?” “What if I tell my Dad that it feels so embarrassing when he treats me like a kid in front of the whole family?” All those “what ifs”. So we do not say anything, just assume or expect the other one to have a minimum of a crystal ball and know what we want. 

Another thing is when we open our mouths but avoid the “hard” conversations and talk about the total bullsh@t. Seriously, when you are over 30 and you are a woman the most important question is what the guy’s favourite colour is on your first date, instead of asking his view of the future (kids, marriage, plans, goals, etc.)? I mean, yes, if you are a teenager this will be one of the most important along with his favourite food and band, but over 30???? Come on ladies!!!! You don’t talk about these because “what if I scare him away”. Guess what?! If he runs away because of these questions, he is a boy and not a man and, if you don’t want to raise someone else’s kid, he is not the one for you. Thank God you figured this out on the first date instead of on your 10th anniversary.

My friend told me something interesting. Back in the day generations lived together and great-grandparents and grandparents helped the women to raise the kids, plus they did not have to work, so they never stressed, because they had help…without asking. Later grandparents were there. When women went back to work they were there and the community had a huge role too. In villages, people knew and helped each other with everything. Nowadays generations live separately, women have the same expectations from society and no one helps or they are conditioned not to ask for help. If we ask for help we feel weak and powerless. That’s what we learn in school too. If you ask for help the other kids laugh at you and start bully (“you dumbass”) or some teachers even note that you are not clever enough. You ask help from your parents as a kid and they are either not at home or don’t have time because of their million other activities. We do not communicate our needs, especially women because we saw in Moana that we have to sort out everything alone and all the positive quotes say that we are strong and able to reach the sky alone. I see that we can do so much and much more than we can imagine on our own, but there are times when we must ask for help and that’s not a weakness, that’s one of the strongest things ever, to leave our pride and admit that we are only human.

Last but not least, my friend has a 13-year-old son. He asked her how to deal with a girl. (Cute, yeah?😊) She told him the 3 ways to be in a relationship, but the first thing she said to him is this: “You sit down and talk about how you imagine your future together. Based on the girl’s answers there are 3 ways to live in a relationship and treat her.” The problem starts here. Parents are not teaching their sons how to deal with a girl or daughters how to treat a boy. Kids don’t learn what it means to be a man or woman. How to act, talk, be one and how to deal with the other gender. We do not have a relationship or gender classes. We learn everything from our experiences and we have so many failures until we may become lucky and finally, that Frog turns into The Prince. Women and men go out to the world without knowing who they are or what are their values and how to treat each other. No boundaries, only insecurity.

So what’s the conclusion? Women don’t need to cut the grass, fix the car or take the first step with the man they are so crazy about (let him be the man), even if you can. Men don’t have to bend and do all the housework, and raise the kids by themselves (but help is a MUST HAVE) especially if they don’t want to. But if you want something, please men up and make the first move, ask her out, call her first or text her without waiting for her to text you (because she is waiting for you as she is a WOMAN). Aka. Girls, it is okay, if you let the guys help kill the dragons and guys, please get your balls back and save us even if we don’t need it, please do not let us be the Hero all the time. 

Okay, even if you are a man or a woman SpitFire up your role and live your life!😘Finally, I want to leave you with Dr. Sara Al Madani’s quote: “ Men and women are not compete with each other they complete each other.”😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Follow me here, on Instagram, Facebook, or Pinterest.

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfiresPinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

10 season-changing tips

Hello guys,

I hope you are well and having a wonderful Fall. As much as I love pumpkin spice lattes, I still prefer iced coffees during hot summer days. BUT very soon we reach the second best time of the year… yeeeess, Christmas Baby!!!🤪 (Sorry, Grincses!!!! 😅)

Anyway, I’m not sure how you feel, but the days are getting shorter, the nights are getting longer, and the weather is chilly and miserable, so for me, it’s a hard job to get out of bed and not just stay there with a nice book and my coffee. Not to mention get sh@t done and be positive in the meantime. This is the hardest season-changing in the year. I’m excited when we enter the Christmas holiday season or not a problem with the “from Winter to Spring” short time. (As you know me, I love Summer, so I’m sure I don’t have to explain my relationship with that change. 😅)So if you relate, I have good news. During my time in London (where most of the time the weather is like this and not just in the autumn) I’ve tried many things to lift my mood and make it easier this period of the year. I found 10 easy things that helped me out of the season change.

  1. Go outside for a little walk. I know and I can even hear: “WTF is wrong with you? Are you crazy? It’s f@cking cold outside!”🤣- Well you are right, but research (and me) proved that only a 10-minute walk lifts your mood, clears your head, helps focus and reduces stress hormones in your body.
  1. Morning exercise. It can be anything. I do 30-40 minutes of yoga or pilates every morning and after that, I feel like I’m a brand new woman who can and will conquer the world. But it can be anything. Go to the gym and lift some weights.💪 Run, if you like. (I do if I have to… for my life.) Most important is to move your body a little bit because exercise will give you a dopamine boost so your mood will be instantly better.
  1. Meditate. Any kind of meditation can help. Focus inside, release the things that no longer serve you, and be quiet. Meditation can be a long walk in nature or sitting on a bench. Don’t necessarily have to be long. 5 minutes is more than enough if you are short on time. The most important is that you are in the present. We are so worried about our past mistakes and all the “what ifs” or stressing about the future, so we forget to enjoy the present. 🧘‍♀️
  1. Be with your loved ones. While the summer is all about going out, fall is more about staying in. But you can still interact with others. Organise a movie night or watch the match together at home. Some like to play board games nights, while others prefer the spa evenings. Family dinners are cool too. No matter what, just do with people who cheer you up. Human interactions are the best mood lifters. You will feel engaged, belonged and valued. 
  1. Dance. When I feel down and have no idea what to do to feel better, I always turn on my music and start dancing. Music is the best cure for everything. When you dance, you move your body and let go of all the stress, and worries and you are in the present. You do not have to be a dancer that’s the beauty of it. Just turn off your mind, feel the music and rhythm, and just be free. Loose yourself, and all the expectations and don’t care about anything else. (Well make sure you use earphones or the volume is not so high because usually, the neighbors’ music taste doesn’t match yours. I’ve tried and they weren’t happy. 🙄🤷‍♀️)
  1. Candles and coffee (or tea). When the days are darker we need as much light as possible. Light up a candle have your favourite coffee or tea and sit for a while. Feel the warmth, gratitude and, safety that a small flame can gives you. Give your soul and mind a bit of time. Buy a candle with your favourite smell. Like this, all of your five senses can be satisfied. Better if you have someone to smuggle with you while you do this lovely and relaxing “exercise”. (P.S. It can be a nice way to meditate too.😘)
  1. Journal. When you feel sad a bit because summer has just gone, grab a piece of paper and write down all the good memories. Everything and everyone why and who you are grateful for. Fill your soul and mind with warm feelings. We usually go back to the past to analyse our mistakes and blame ourselves. So why don’t we use our minds to recall happy memories? (Another good way to do this is if you don’t have pen and paper around you and need an instant mood lift if you check your photo album on your smartphone or social media.😉)
  1. Celebrate. Celebrate every small victory. Permit yourself to feel proud. Did you manage to get out of bed? Good, celebrate with a coffee. Have you done your job? Cool. Let’s eat your favourite cake. Done your morning exercise? High-five yourself. No matter what you accomplish during the day, reward yourself. Doesn’t have to be a big thing (but if you have the money you can buy the new iPhone as a reward 😉). Just make sure you let your mind know that you are super cool. (I know so many of you are on a diet and now shouting to me… hey, it can be anything, not necessary to reward with food. A smile to your reflection in the mirror with a nice affirmation, such as “You are the best, b@tch, we’ve done it!” is fine. However, BigMac with Coke is a bit more satisfying.😜)
  1. Watch a funny movie. While watching a comedy your body produces dopamine and you will feel happy and excited again. My go-to movie is Mamma Mia. Dance, Music, fun and romance together. What is your favourite happy movie? Sit down and give yourself time to enjoy it. When you feel a piece of sh@t, you just do yourself a favour and laugh. Allow yourself a bit of a smile. 
  1. Process the sadness. I know it doesn’t sound so positive and mood-lifting, but to move on is necessary to feel everything. If you just try to be happy and you forget to deal with the not-so-pleasant things, you create a resistance in your body and it will cause much more harm than good. So first sit down, feel the sh@t, cry, and let out the anger and the depression, so after that, you will have space for the good. There are many ways to release negative emotions, find yours. (I’m thinking about a full post with release techniques.🤔 Let me know if you want to hear them. 😂)

Don’t worry too much about the depressive weather and all those feelings, just let go of what no longer serves you and do something that makes you feel happy. Trust me all seasons are come and go, this one too. Very soon you will be ready to celebrate life (and Christmas😅) again. I am holding your hand and with you on this. Tom Hanks said once that the best advice he ever had was: “It shall pass!” Well guys Fall will pass soon so enjoy the good part of it, the colorful leaves, the pumpkins, the Halloween (I love that spooky night too.😅) and try to be in the present as much as you can. 

So nothing left to say other than Spice up your latte, fire up your candles and walk through Fall together because we are the SpitFires and SpitFires never left anyone behind.😘 

Oh, and please don’t forget: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Follow me here, on Instagram, Facebook, or Pinterest.

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

25 life lessons from the past twelve months

Hello guys,

I hope you are well and enjoying the last few days of the 2024 Summer! 😊

So yesterday was the first anniversary of my move back to Hungary and many things happened during the past 12 months. The most repeated question in my life is: Do you regret moving back from London? Well, I had ups and downs, I had to throw away many of my “Plans” and almost nothing went according to my “Master Plan”, but I have learnt a lot. I have learnt from myself, my friends, my family, my life, the life back home, people I have left in London, work, challenges, etc. So instead of telling you all the ups and downs, I just want to focus on the lessons I have learnt, so maybe you will benefit from them too. Because I think these help us grow and be better.

So here are my 25+1 life lessons from the past 12 months: 

  1. My nephew’s smile is the best cure for everything. 😇
  2. It’s worth it to be brave and go out of your nutshell and try new things.
  3. If someone wants to see you, they will find the time and opportunity. (Even if they travel around Europe!) 😉
  4. You do not need so much money to organise a kids’ party.
  5. I still look cute in my Santa hat. 🤶
  6. Time with your family and friends you cannot buy on money.
  7. I can be happy alone too.
  8. Walk 8000 steps or more and you lose 5kg under 2 months. 😉
  9. No matter how kind, good-looking, nice or helpful you are, you will always have haters. And that’s okay because it means you doing good.👠
  10. Let people judge you. You have nothing to do with their opinion. You are not equal with the things people say or think about you.
  11. Sunset is ALWAYS magical. Every day is the same and every day is different.
  12. The beach is my happy place. It calms my mind and helps me to let go of things that no longer serve me.
  13. A 70-year-old random lady can become one of the nicest friends ever.🥰
  14. You must go out, especially when you want the less.
  15. Someone will never change because they do not want to. Let them be and try to avoid contact with them or cut them out if possible. 
  16. I can’t/won’t and want to save everyone. Everyone has to take responsibility for their actions. I do not have to fix everything and everyone.
  17. If you want something, believe it, work hard for it and if it is meant for you to have it, you will. Just try never to give up.
  18. Music is the best therapy!!!!! (No more comment, that’s it!) 👨‍🎤🎸
  19. Hungary isn’t so cold during the Winter, but the snow is magical. ❄
  20. Have a healthy diet, take care of your body and shape, BUT… absolutely unacceptable and even I think it should be charged the people who don’t eat lángos, chimney cake and drink beer during the Summer, next to the Balaton!!!! That’s it! No excuse! Sorry! Seriously, who hurt you in your childhood??? 🤣😝
  21. When you are 35 years old or above, you cannot party 3 nights in a row. Nope! Trust me, I have tested this theory for you guys! 😅 (By the way, you’re welcome!😂) (If you can, you are my Hero and please message me the secret😅)
  22. Nothing will go according to “The Plan”, but be excited about what better things will come.
  23. Seeing old friends helps you close parts of your past you thought that they are closed already and warms your heart.
  24. You never know when you meet new friends. Some will stay and some will not and that’s okay. Most of our friends are only for a season and not for a lifetime. Be grateful for the time together and when/if the time has come, release them. Everyone is just a passenger in our life. 
  25. You need to be careful because people understand the language you speak. (Long, funny, but so embarrassing story, not today.)😅

+1: Be excited for the future and try not to control everything in your life. Shit will happen and it’s okay. Feel bad, be angry, cry, do whatever feels good. Stop, relax and then kick your ass (or if you are a woman, straighten your crown), Spitfire up and move forward! If you believe it much better things will come than you can ever imagine!👑

Oh, and please don’t forget: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Thank you for the pancake offers guys, you are amazing!!!!!!!! I am so grateful for your kindness! 🤣

Follow me here, on Instagram, Facebook, or Pinterest.

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

No husband, no kids, no pancakes aka single woman’s life in Hungary

Hello guys,

What’s up? I hope you are well and enjoying the Summer. It has been a while since I last wrote to you, but contrary to beliefs, a single woman has a life too with many tasks.

And my last sentence is the main reason I’m here. What is the connection between the pancakes and the single life? Well, trust me you will understand it very soon. Let me start with a story from a couple of months ago. So I asked my Mom to make pancakes for me. Of course, she said yes, but something always happened so I left without pancakes. (I know I can do it for myself and why am I waiting for my mother to do this for me? But trust me, it is much better if I do not even start the pancakes…anything else but this food. 😅) Later on, it seemed that the stars were aligned, and I could eat this delicious dessert…but something happened again…my mother asked my sister-in-law what she wanted to eat (because our family gathered together again) and said something else. 

Now I want to stop here for a second before any misunderstanding happens. I love my sister-in-law and I love the food she suggested, plus my mom didn’t say yes to her on purpose or because she disrespected me or she put anyone above me. Life just happened and mom forgot that she promised the pancakes to me. So you can ask what is the issue then? The “issue” was that my amazing mother told me when I confronted her that “your sister-in-law carries my next grandchild”. It makes sense and I agree, but a few months earlier my dad told me that he could not ask my brother about something (that I totally forgot and not even relevant) because my brother has his family and he has a life. I told my dad that even though I do not have a family of my own I have my life too. But he said that’s nothing, you do not have a life until you have your own family. 

And these two events made me think. So if I read this situation correctly, if you do not have a husband and kids, you do not have a life aka you have time and energy to do everything that everyone wants and your vote will count next time whenever you get at least a boyfriend next to you. Hmm. Interesting.🤔😅 It seemed that I had to get pregnant to get my pancakes.😱😅

I started to think and recognise some basic truths about how your family, friends and the people around you usually see you in Hungary (especially in the countryside) if you are 35 years old, a woman and single. First I want to clarify some things. There are two types of singles. 

  • The ones who chose to be single. They do not want family, kids or the complications that even a relationship could cause. 
  • And there is another type (just like me), life happened. They want to have a family, kids and all the other things, but Life hasn’t given it to them yet. They are not single by choice. 

And the biggest problem is that no one makes an effort to ask you which single group you are in. Most people don’t even realize that types exist. They just automatically assume that you chose to be single. This is what you want. 

When I used to live in London, no one cared. Why would they? 10-12 million people in the city, and nothing new under the sun. I wasn’t the only one who didn’t have a relationship. The age is crucial in this subject. If we lived in the Bridgerton era, I would be called a spinster… well, I am called the spinster nowadays too (totally like Bridget Jones).🤣 Anyway, in London, no one cares if you go to the Mall in your pyjamas on Sunday afternoon, so obviously they care less about your marital status?!

BUT in Hungary… different. ( I know if I lived in a big city here in Hungary would be easier too). Big city, with millions of people, so no one knows you. In Hungary, the whole country’s population is less than the number of people living in London. It means that everyone in the country knows everyone or at least some who knows someone, who knows at least one of your relevant.🙄 And we Hungarians are very judgy. We judge everything and everyone. The social expectation in the countryside is that you have to be married, have at least one kid, your house and car in your garage before the age of 30. If you are at least not married before you hit the third X and you are a woman… you better dig your grave and wait for death, because “you will die alone”. (Or at least that’s what they say.)

So here are some of the latest examples I have heard regarding my marital status from my beloved circle:

  1. “Something is wrong with you! You are too picky, you are not good enough or you are way too strong so every man just runs away from you.”- I do not even want to comment on this. 😂
  2. “We are worried because kids are the meaning of life.” I love the kids and I wish to have one, but still, I think my life has a purpose without them too. Maybe I am wrong. 🤔
  3. “There aren’t many decent guys left at your age, you cannot be picky otherwise you will never get married. (and die alone)” Again, I wish to get married one day, but I rather live alone than be in a toxic relationship just to be married and have kids, so our society accepts me. No one can make you happy, you are the one who is responsible for your happiness. Plus not everyone is that lucky to find her/his other half 10-15 years ago and live happily ever after. (At least not that much I know.)
  4. “You need a husband, a house, a kid, a dog and a car, so your life can be happy.”- No one ever asked me what makes me happy. Some people are happy alone. Some of us are just happy if we can travel instead of changing diapers.

These are just the few sentences I have to hear. Getting a boyfriend is not easy. It is not like I go to Tesco and buy one. I do not choose to be single. Life happened. I had relationships, I had my heart broken and during the pandemic, I closed myself and now I try to open up again. If you ever had a heartbreak, you know it is hard to get out and trust again. However, I try, to give everyone a possibility. I do not search for a boyfriend, husband or anything… he will come whenever it is the time. (Well, if not then I inherit everything to my nephews. 😅) I am fine as it is, to be honest. But I am sharing with you my last two experiences (just to support my claim)…since these two men, I care less about dating than ever. 

  1. He is a lovely guy, so nice and kind. However, after 2 days of talking on the phone (not even meeting), he told me that his goals are for this year to get married and have a kid. (It was in the middle of February). – I mean, I want these things but NOT TOMORROW!!!!!🤣I am not desperate. Plus this is another important thing to mention, that there is a difference between wanting a kid or a family. I do not want a kid just to have one and thick on my list… I want a family with a partner to grow together and support each other. 

Also, this guy told me, he would give his salary to his wife, but he wants her to clean, wash the dishes, cook, do the laundry, etc. But in return, he will do the “men’s jobs”.- I can cut the grass too, thank you. I am not a feminist and I want the guys to open the door for me but to share the housework (men and women work too) is basic with me. I do not wish to be anyone’s maid. 

  1. This last one wasn’t even a date or anything. The guy liked me so much and he couldn’t be more obvious even if he would try to. We met at my friend’s house and for the whole evening, he just talked about how beautiful my eyes are and how lovely my smile is, etc.- So the point is that he was cute, but he doesn’t like to take care of personal hygiene. No more explanation… I do not even want to go into this. Let your imagination work. 

So after these two I “gave up”.😅 Trust me there were more interesting stories, but a woman never gave out all her secrets. Maybe I am picky, but to me personal hygiene, nice talk about various things or not dealing with me as an object is important. I am not perfect. I have millions and millions of defaults. My teeth are not straight, I have a couple of wrinkles, I am chubby during the winter, I am also stubborn, loud, passionate and very moody, but I know my values. 

Even though it is annoying to listen to people’s judgement, I do not care. Don’t get me wrong it bothered me and I felt I was nothing and no one… I even started to feel depressed again, but I stopped and started to think and then I realized something that I always tell you guys: At the end of the day doesn’t matter what people think of you until you are happy with yourself and your life. And I am. I am not where I thought I would be at my age, but I am happy with what I have. I have plans, goals and dreams, just like everyone else. What will happen next I am not sure. I have no idea how my life will be in 5 years, but I do not let other people’s noise get into my head and destroy the good things in my life.

So being single or married, divorced or in a relationship, doesn’t matter your material status, the only thing matters the most is that how you feel about yourself and your life.

SpitFire up and enjoy this period of your life because you never know what tomorrow will bring.🤗

Oh, and please don’t forget: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Follow me here, on Instagram, Facebook, or Pinterest.

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

“Dearest Gentle Reader!”

Don’t worry, I will not start and never be able to copy the one and only Lady Wistledown, but this letter is addressed directly to you. (Plus I am obsessed with The Bridgertons at the moment.🤣) However, this isn’t the cause I remained silent for this long. I had to make many decisions during the past few months, including whether I wish to continue this blog. 

This blog was born because I always wanted to write a blog and continued since I moved back to Hungary to help me keep my English. But this became an update page for the lazy people around me. Many people around me started to ask when I created an update because since I moved home they know less about me than when I lived in London, simply because I posted more while I was back there. And to be honest that’s when I realised that I became a “people pleaser” again. I forget to read and use my post about this subject. ( Well, we learn until we die, I guess. 😅)

Since I started my life at home, unconsciously I came back to my old habits and old patterns which are attached to this country and the life I lived 11 years ago before I stepped foot on British soil. Even most of the people around me think that those years have not made any marks on me or worse, they simply ignore the fact that London changed me a lot, the truth is that I am not the same 23-year-old girl who left back then. So no, I will not pretend that I am she. Some things will never change such as the fact that I will always be a village girl, who speaks too much, laughs loudly and is way too sentimental, but I grow up now. And that’s something that everyone must accept. Of course, this was my fault entirely, I let them deal with me as if nothing happened in the past few years.

I decided to write in Hungarian too because I had enough of the fact that my friends asked me to do so. But honestly, I never wanted to write in my mother tongue. I wanted to improve my English when I started. This blog as I mentioned in one of my first posts is not for you who read it, it is for me who write it. Of course, I intend to help as many people as possible via my stories, and if you make an effort to read them, may or may not you get something. 

So no, I will not write in Hungarian in the future, because if you care about what is in this, you can make a small effort and use the Google Translator. And I post when I feel I have time and energy, but not when you want me to. This site will not be an update page for all the lazy ones. I understand it is easier to read what is going on in my life instead of calling, texting, messaging or contacting me in any other form of communication. I still want to help and that is still my mission with this blog, but with my own rules. I do not wish to check the stats that how many people read what I said or constantly wait for some feedback, so I feel approved, loved and precious. My psychology studies reminded me of something. Especially Maslow’s hierarchy of needs pyramid. Maslow argued that survival needs must be satisfied before the individual can satisfy the higher needs. He said we first must satisfy the need for love and belonging or safety before we can do anything with self-actualization. Well, the only problem is that we think (most of the time we even strongly believe) that these needs can be satisfied only externally. I wanted to be loved and feel to belong so I bent my other needs and personality to fit in. And of course, the biggest lie: “ I do not want to hurt anyone.” Let me tell you something, You cannot hurt anyone and no one can hurt you, just like no one able to make you happy or loved, if you do not let them. Every level of the pyramid can and should be satisfied inside of you first and then, you can attract the external too.

I decided to live my life, write my blog and organise my time how it fits ME. If you want to be part of my journey I am so happy and you are more than welcome to read my words and hopefully get some help or at least laugh a bit about my silliness. You can write to me anytime on any platform, but I do not continue to write just for you, Dearest Gentle Reader. Those of you who are my friends or family members, I love you so much and without your support, I would be lost for sure, but if I do not post in 2 months and you want to know what is going on in my life because you care about me, please grab your “very” smart phones and drop a message, anytime. 😘

I know it wasn’t the usual Silly SpirtFiry post, but behind this screen, I am a human too. And as I always telling you: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.😘 

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: I hope, I will be back soon with some funny content about the Life of a Single in Hungary…trust me it matters the country and the city regarding this subject.😅 Love you all!!!

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Egyéb kategória Story of My Life

Positive Projects

Görgess le a magyar változat olvasásához! 😘

Hello Guys,

I hope you are having the time of your life. It feels like Summer started in Hungary. 30 degrees, sunshine, the birds are chirping and the sky is the most amazing blue you can imagine. 😊

Okay, before you start to hate me about the quick forecast, I’ll let you know why I am here today. So as I mentioned in my last posts I have a “huge project” on my plate so that was why I was off the radar. Now it turns out that I finished that project, and I have a couple more. 😅 Don’t worry hopefully these projects will benefit you too.

So I have done my B2 English exam and now I would like to start to teach or help kids in English. I attached the details below, so you can find them if you are interested. Now I started to do a pedagogical assistant course and hopefully, I’ll have my exam in November. I know, now you asking “But why should I care about these things?” and you are right. You shouldn’t unless you have a kid and need some help with English, BUT what it is about you guys is the fact that I would like to create a Facebook Group for all the SpirFires around the world where you can talk to each other and share your wisdom. Also, I am planning to create a new site here called “Positive Academy” where I would like to share some tools with you which hopefully can help to be more positive. My goal is to build a community for us. A safe place where you can communicate and together try to solve everyday issues. 

Another new thing is that I’ll do this not just in English but in Hungarian too. I never wanted to write Hungarian, but so many of my friends and family members asked for it and I feel now is the time that I start to do it. All my posts will be uploaded in Hungarian too. You can communicate in whichever language you wish in the Facebook Group too.

The daily positive quotes will be back tomorrow (that one will be kept in English. Sorry guys but way too much work to translate them to Hungarian). These will be posted on all my social media, so please follow me there too. And some things will be available only on those platforms.

Furthermore, I attached my Life coaching certificates because I wish to start practising as a Life coach. I have done those courses but I never felt enough brave to work in them. I thought who would listen to me, who would be curious about what I could offer. Now I put my big girl’s pants on and show up. My dream has always been to help people navigate their lives and I believe I can. I wish to make this site as interactive as it can be. Throughout our difficulties, we can help each other to grow. By sharing our stories we can learn. And sometimes we just need to know that we are not alone.

So I’ll do the technical base on these things and I would like to ask for help. I want you to send me a DM on social media or in the comments here (even you can send an email to spiritofspitfires@gmail.com, and I’ll try to answer within 24 hours to everyone.) and let me know what would you like to hear. Which subjects do you want me to dig in? How can I help you more? What things bother you?

Also, if you want to have individual sessions, please drop me a line anywhere and I’ll contact you and we can discuss the details. Or if you want to have group sessions and there will be enough people I am more than happy to do so. 

Please let me know if you have any questions! I hope these changes will benefit all of us. As soon as I have the “Positive Academy” section here and the Facebook Group I will let you know. I will also update you on how things are going on in my Hungarian life. 😎Be brave together and help each other.

Until that SpitFire up and enjoy the Summer because it is here for sure.🤗

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Follow me here, on Instagram, Facebook, or Pinterest.

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Magyarul!!!!!

Helló Mindenki,

Remélem, jól vagytok és szuperül telnek a napjaitok. Megjött a nyár,  30 fok, napsütés, a madarak csiripelnek, és az ég a legcsodálatosabb kék, amit csak el tudtok képzelni. 😊

Oké, mielőtt meggyűlölnétek a rövid kis előrejelzés miatt, elmondom, miért vagyok ma itt. Tehát, ahogy az előző bejegyzéseimben említettem, egy “hatalmas projekten” dolgoztam, ezért nem posztoltam olyan sokat. Most kiderült, hogy befejeztem ezt a projektet, de jó pár újabb került a helyére. 😅 Pánikra semmi ok, nem csak mert ura vagyok a helyzetnek (legalább is ebben reménykedek), hanem mert ezek remélhetőleg nektek is hasznosak lesznek.

Tehát elvégeztem a B2 angol nyelvvizsgámat, és most szeretnék angolt tanítani illetve korrepetálni a gyerkőcöket. (Lent megtaláltok minden részletet ezzel kapcsolatben) Most kezdtem el egy pedagógiai asszisztens tanfolyamot, és remélhetőleg novemberben lesz a vizsgám. Tudom, most azt kérdezitek: “És minket ez hol kéne, hogy éredekljen?”, és igazatok is van. Nem kéne, hacsak nincs gyereketek akinek segítségre van szükségre lenne szüksége angoluból, DE ami a lényeg, az az a tény, hogy szeretnék létrehozni egy Facebook csoportot a világ összes SpirFire-je számára, ahol beszélgethettek és megoszthatjátok ügyes bajos dolgaitokat amikre megpróbálunk együtt megoldást találni. Azt is tervezem, hogy létrehozok egy új szekciót itt a blogon “Pozitív Akadémia” néven, ahol szeretnék megosztani veletek néhány technikát, amelyek remélhetőleg segíthetnek pozitívabbá válni. A célom az ezzel, hogy eg szuper segítőkész közösséget hozzak létre mindannyiunknak.  Egy biztonságos hely, ahol , és együtt mekommunikálhatunk és megpróbálhatjuk megoldani a mindennapi problémákat, közösen.

A másik újdonság, hogy ezt nem csak angolul, hanem magyarul is meg fogom csinálni. Soha nem akartam magyarul írni, de nagyon sok barátom és családtagom kérte, és úgy érzem, itt az ideje, hogy elkezdjem. Minden bejegyzésem magyar nyelven is feltöltésre kerül. (Kezdve ezzel. 😅) Plusz a Facebook csoportban is bármilyen nyelven kommunikálhattok.

A napi pozitív idézetek holnap visszatérnek (Ez marad angolul. Bocsi srácok, de túl sok munka lefordítani őket magyarra, újra szerkesztei a képeket, stb. Szóval Google továbbra is a barátotok marad ezen a téren.😘). Ezeket közzé fogom tenni az összes közösségi médiámon, ezért kérlek, kövess engem ott is. Néhány dolog csak ezeken a platformokon lesz elérhető.

Továbbá megtaláljátok a Life coaching bizonyítványaimat, mert szeretném magam kipróbálni ebben is. Elvégeztem ezeket a tanfolyamokat, de soha nem éreztem magam elég bátornak ahhoz, hogy dolgozzak benne. Gondoltam, ki hallgat rám, ki lesz kíváncsi arra, hogy mit tudok nyújtani. Most viszont úgy döntöttem, hogy nem hagyom a félelmeimnek, hogy megbénítsanak, szóval felkötöttem a gatyát és itt vagyok. Mindig is az volt az álmom, hogy segítsek az embereknek eligazodni az életükben, és hiszem, hogy képes vagyok rá. Szeretném ezt az oldalt a lehető leginteraktívabbá tenni. Nehézségeink közepette segíthetünk egymásnak a fejlődésben. Történeteink megosztásával tanulhatunk és néha csak az kell, hogy tudjuk nem vagyunk egyedül a problémánkkal a Nagy Világban.

Tehát én elkezdem megteremteni a technikai alapokat a felsoroltakhoz, de szeretnék segítséget kérni. Szeretném, ha küldenétek nekem üzenetet a közösségi médiában vagy az itteni megjegyzésekben(comment gomb lent) (akár e-mailt is küldhettek a  spiritofspitfires@gmail.com email címre, és megpróbálok 24 órán belül válaszolni mindenkinek.), és mondjátok el, hogy miről szeretnétek ha többet írnék. Milyen témákban szeretnétek, hogy beleássam magam? Hogyan segíthetek többet? Milyen dolgok zavarnak?

Továbbá, ha egyéni foglalkozásokat szeretnétek, légyszi, írjatok privátban, és megbeszéljük a részleteket. Vagy ha csoportos foglalkozásokat szeretnétek, hogy tartsak, és elég ember lesz, örömmel megteszem.

Kérlek benneteket, ha bármilyen kérdesetek van szóljatok nyugodtan! Remélem, hogy ezek a változások mindannyiunk javát szolgálják majd. Amint itt van a “Pozitív Akadémia” szekció és a Facebook csoport, tudatni fogom veletek. Arról is tájékoztatni foglak benneteket, hogyan zajlanak a dolgok az életemben itthon. 😎Legyünk bátrak együtt és segítsük egymást.

Addig is élvezzétek a nyarat és várom a javaslataitokat. 😘

Ó, és kérlek, ne feledd: nem kell mindig erősnek lenned ahhoz, hogy hős legyél.🤗

XOXO,

Krisz 😘

U.I.: Kövessetek a Facebookon, Instagramon és/vagy Pinteresten is.

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Egyéb kategória Story of My Life

The Start

Hello Guys,

I hope you are well and enjoying the lovely Spring weather. Lately, I have been thinking a lot about what to write. So many things have happened since I last wrote to you. Luckily, there are many nice things, but I decided to talk more about the past. I have left my moving to London story before the actual flight. (You can read the first part The Beginning and the second part The Preparation here.) Back in Hungary, I realised that I must explain my years in the city to understand what is happening in my life right now. So here is the third and last part of this story. I hope you will enjoy it.

In January 2013, we arrived at London, Luton airport. That was the first, I had ever been on a plane. I was scared and sad. I was excited, but I felt sorrow to leave everything and everyone I knew behind. Luckily, my best friend was with me. A silver Mercedes Benz waited at the airport to take us to our new home. I remember it was snowing in Hungary and bright sunshine in London. 

We arrived at Wood Green, which is a not-too-nice part of London (zone 3, North London). Our new home was a shared house. 9 people, including us, lived in a 5 bedroom, 2 toilets, one bathroom and a small kitchen house with a tiny garden (at that moment looked like the garden was a rubbish place). There were couples, older people, young guys… we felt lost. Our room (because do not dream about that you have your own flat first you arrive in London unless you have at least a year’s savings, which we never had) was small, with a double bed and a cupboard… that’s it. Well, we had only one suitcase each, so we did not need it in a bigger place, but still, it felt so claustrophobic. The housemates were not nice. They were a bunch of people who lived next to each other. 

The next day, we had an appointment at the lettings agency’s office on Halloway Road. It was a couple of miles away from us, so we decided to walk there. As I said we were naive as Hell. We did not have mobile internet or GPS on the phone and we had no idea where we were. After a couple of minutes galavanting on the street, we asked a girl at the bus stop where is Holloway Road. She was Hungarian luckily, but she wasn’t sure. Either way, that girl was kind enough to help go to Wood Green station and buy a weekly bus-only oyster card (an oyster card is a kind of travel card, which you can top up, weekly, monthly, for zones, only for the bus or including tube and every other TFL services) and told us that 29 bus will take us to Trafalgar Square and that’s the bus route we need to get to the agency’s office. 

We managed to find the office and sorted out our letting contract, plus they gave us a list of the job agencies. We thought we were fine, we would visit all the agencies during the next couple of days and everything would be just perfect. But life isn’t and wasn’t that easy, at least not back in January 2013.

Here I wish to stop and before I continue the story, I would like to mention a teeny-tiny issue that we discovered. I thought that I spoke English because back in high school my lovely teachers taught me and I had amazing grades… well, what you learn in the school in Hungary has nothing to do with the actual language that people speak in England especially not in London. Let me explain. What you learn in the schools is the “perfect” literature English, instead in England most of the born Britts do not speak properly their mother tongue. There are many slang and figures of speech that you who study this amazing language never learn in school. Not to mention the fact that London is a huge mix of people come from different countries, cultures, races, and religions, which is beautiful and helped me a lot to accept people around me the way they are, but in the meantime, everyone uses their mother tongue melted in the English they speak. So until you just learn a language and not live it, you cannot say that you speak it.

Now back to our first full day in London. We thought that we were done for the day, so we bought some toast and salami (we had to pay the deposit the first week in advance, so we did not have left money to buy anything else) and spoke with our family on Skype… well, Life thought otherwise. We found the 29 bus back to Wood Green destination, but when we arrived, we had no idea where we were. We had no idea how to find our street with our house in it. We tried to ask people, but they had no idea either or they just ignored us. So the only thing we came up with was to call my brother, back in his Hungarian High School. Why him? Because he was in colleague and we knew that in the dorm they have internet access, he can check the map. We told him that we were standing in front of a building called Wood Green Crown Court and our address of course. He navigated us back to our house from Hungary. 😅 

The agency said that we were lucky because we had an appointment to get our NI number (TB number in Hungary) the next day at the Camden Job Centre. We knew which bus we had to use from Wood Green and drop off at Camden Station ( we had no idea how many variations exist of the “Camden” bus stop, but let’s slow down 😅). The only thing we didn’t know that which side of the road we had to catch the bus. After a while, we realised that we were going in the wrong direction as we picked the bus on the wrong side, so we had to drop off and catch the other bus. The good thing about London is that buses and tubes come every minute or so, but we were way too far from Camden to make it on time to the appointment. Anyway, we tried. 

Once we saw the first “Camden” bus stop (which was still a 15-minute walk from the one we needed) we just left the bus and started to run like no tomorrow. But we were unable to find the Job Centre. Here is another fun fact about how different London and Hungary are. The Job Centres in Hungary usually take place in a nice, old historical building which you can never miss, but instead in London, they look just like a chicken shop in the corner. So in the end, it became cold, it started to rain and we were lost in Camden Town. We called the agency and asked them to make another appointment and begged them to try and tell us where the Job Centre is. They were laughing at us and they said that no one ever lost in Camden or was unable to find the place. But in the end, we found it. I remember we had our lunch (sandwiches made at home) in a park and we decided to see Trafalgar Square as we saw our life-saving bus, the iconic 29. That bus was our guide for so long after that. So we were freezing, wet, humiliated, lost, sad and miserable, but we saw the famous Trafalgar Square first in our life. We had no idea how many memories would be attached to that place in the future and how the square would become one of the most important places for us, a bit of a centre point not just for that large city, but for our lives too.

The next couple of weeks was quite the same. We woke up early, got ready, grabbed the bus and visited all the agencies on our list. We started to know better the city, understand more about the places, the public transportation (only buses because we had no money to pay for the tube), the people around us and how things are working in London. Our housemates told us about the cleaning agency where they worked, so we went there and my best friend finally got a job there as a night cleaner. A few nights later he called me and I was able to start there too. That was our first job. I do not wish to tell the name of the agency, but we became night cleaners in one of the Michelin-star restaurants in London, called The Delaney. Our supervisor was a young Polish guy, who grew up in the city and he helped me a lot to learn the language. He sat next to me for hours to make sure that I could tell what I wanted. The job just came on time. I will never forget the night before our first payday. It was a Thursday evening. We used our two-week deposit so we had to pay the rent on Sunday or at least one week otherwise the agency said that we would be homeless. That night was our off night ( we worked 6 nights a week and only one was off). We decided to see Big Ben, Westminster Abbey, the Parlament and the London Eye (from outside of course). The weather was nice and we crossed the river Thames on the Hungerford and Golden Jubilee Bridge. We were in the middle of the bridge, the view was breathtaking and we heard a song played by a guy with his guitar. I do not remember the song, but I do remember that we only had 75 pence left in our wallet. No more, no less. We expected our salary the next day morning. At that point, we bought food from the money we found in the restaurant during our shifts. If we did not find anything, we had to portion our bread and butter to make sure we had something to eat every day. But we gave all of our money to this guy on the bridge and just enjoyed the view. The next day we got our first salaries and they were more than we had wished. Not that much, we only be able to pay one week’s rent and we were still a week behind, but we finally could breathe a bit. That’s when things started to be better a bit. It was millions of ups and downs, on the career path, personal relationships and accommodations, but after that, I have not cried every day (maybe every other day 😋) and did not question my decision that much. It will be parts of my past in London that I will share with you guys, but I thought I could not write down every major thing that happened in London because in the end every little thing formed me and needed to help me become who I am and I am unable to write down all of them. So that’s why I decided to write “my diary” under the story of my life” section because I think I can help you more to get through life and all its difficulties during my daily/weekly stories. (Please feel free to let me know if I am wrong. 😅)

Sometimes you have to give everything, leave everything behind, lose almost everything to be able to receive what the Universe wants to give you and those things will be much better than the things you can imagine. We just have to let Life guide us. So SpitFire up and let go of what bothers you. 😘

Oh, and please don’t forget: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Follow me here, on Instagram, Facebook, or Pinterest.

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

Help for a friend

Hello guys,

My birthday is coming soon and usually, I do not ask for anything, because thank God, I have everything I need. 

However, this year I have only one wish to help my best friend to achieve his goal. He has a big dream. He started to write his first book. It is an amazing book, and my only birthday wish is that as many of you share his book’s links and subscribe to his launching pages.

I believe in the good in people and that we all want to help someone with a dream.

Thank you for reading, sharing, and subscribing!

I love you all!!! 😘

XOXO,

Krisz 😘

https://www.patreon.com/Control381?utm_medium=clipboard_copy&utm_source=copyLink&utm_campaign=creatorshare_fan&utm_content=join_link

https://substack.com/@adamgreczi

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

Bumps on the road

Hello Guys,

I know I haven’t been active in the past few months and first I would like to apologise about this. I am so sorry, but I started another major “Life project” and I am almost finished with it (once I’ve done it, I will tell you all the details, I promise… and no, I am not moving again, this is something different. 😅), so that’s the main reason why I was in total silent.

But, I didn’t want you to think that I bailed on you or I had forgotten about my many promises, because I am not, and also I didn’t want another month to pass by without a word from me. So many nice things happened to me and I have learnt other important lessons and want to share two of them now.

Have you ever felt that December was a magical month and everything finally get it in shape, you were so happy and all of a sudden January just became total crap. Like on New Year’s Eve, someone just flipped the switch and from heaven you landed in hell? Even though you had all the New Year’s resolutions, a lovely list on a nice piece of paper, the year starts with sh@t. Well, this happened to me all the time. In almost all the 35 years I am on Earth, January became not just the longest, but the worst month of the year, after an amazing Christmas time. Like everything is against my resolutions. Until now. I think, I finally figured out the “Mistery of January”. Bumps on the road.

I know, now you are confused, so let me clear the air. 😅 (I am not crazy, or at least not worse than previously.) I thought Life/God was against me and didn’t want me to achieve my goals, so sending me all the signs in January to give up and continue to walk on the path I have been. But It has done nothing, just asked me to confirm if I am willing to do the work, even if sometimes it will be hard. It is all about our mindset. Previously, I convinced myself that these were “bad things” and that I did not deserve something better or different, but in the end, they were just bumps on the road. They are still annoying as Hell, that’s for sure, but we are the ones who can decide how we look at them. We can look at them in the way that these things are against us, or we can see them as guides. Lessons. If we do not give them the power and we only see some bumps that we can pass through, they will look less scary and more manageable. How to handle them? 

  1. Stop for a second (before you start all the drama in your head) and identify that something happened that doesn’t feel comfortable, so it is a “bump on the road”.
  2. Find what this “bump” tries to teach you, or what message it gives you. (Maybe, you have to just “confirm” that you want that thing on your list. Maybe you missed an important detail. You will know for sure. Just listen to your instincts.)

The other lesson that the beginning of the new year taught me came from my amazing friend and mentor. She told me this breathtaking example many times during the years since we knew each other, but this time I finally got it. (As Sansa Stark said in Game of Thrones: “I am a slow learner, that’s true. But I learn.” 😅) 

My friend told me that these unwanted events are nothing more than parents checking on their kids if they are sure about what they want. Like when you go to the store with your kid and let him or her choose one item. When they make their decision you as a parent ask them if they are sure about it, because they will not be able to change their mind, once you paid for the item. Sometimes you even tell them the downside of their choice too, to make sure they are certain. This is what Life does with us when we have the bumps on the road. Just asking us, if we are sure about our choice and sometimes shows us the consequences too. So next time, if you feel that everything is just pilled up, think about it as a bump on the road. Just a simple question from above. Nothing else. No one is against you, no one wants you to fail. Just a test.

In previous years I had my well-written list with all the things I wanted to achieve during the next 12 months, but for the first difficulties, I just gave up and chose the comfortable, easy way and had done nothing. I finally learnt that you cannot change or achieve anything without some discomfort. If you feel the excitement, and scares you, means that you are on your way to change, to get what you want. Because if you do the same things over and over again, you will have the same results. And the new, unknown things will terrify you, but that’s okay. As Cat said in Marry Me: “If you want something different, you have to do something different.” 

So guys trust your guts and don’t be afraid of the bumps on the road. I guarantee you that you will have them, but if you think of them as lessons and tests from the Universe/Life/God however you call it, it will be much easier to pass them. SpitFire up and good luck to identify and go through those little buggers.😘

Oh, and please don’t forget: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Follow me here, on Instagram, Facebook, or Pinterest.

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

“Let them” theory or how to enjoy the Holiday season

Hello guys,

I hope you are well and ready for my favourite holiday of all time… yes, It’s Christmas time Baby!!! 😅

Even though since Winter arrived, we are most likely to close ourselves in the room with a warm blanket, a nice mug of hot chocolate and a movie or book, we still have to interact with people around us especially now during the holiday season. Have you ever felt that you wish you had a magic wand and change the people around you? I am sure we all had this idea once or twice… hourly. But we all know that we cannot do this. (Nope, not in a legal way for sure. 😅)

Since I relocated back to my country, I have had more interaction with people and some of them are not avoidable. But what we can do if we are not from a Harry Potter movie? Well, I found the answer… actually, Mel Robbins found the answer with her “Let Them” theory. I link you here to the entire podcast episode about this, so you can hear from her the whole thing. I mentioned her name and work so many times in this blog and the fact that the woman is brilliant and I adore her. 

I heard about this theory from her a long time ago and my mentor/friend told me this in a different way, but you know how life works? You hear something, you do it, it works, and when things are good and Life flows, you forget about it and not practice it until you need it again. (Typical and absolutely wrong, but we are human, we have to make mistakes a million times to finally get them. Life!🙄)

Essentially, it’s about acknowledging that we can’t control other people and letting go of the expectations we force on those closest to us. You allow things as they are and not as you wish them to be. It is easier to say than done… I know. But it is easy. If you listen to the podcast you can have examples, but I share some of mine, how this little brain hack changed my life and especially my relationships.

So first, how to use it? Simple.

  1. Recognize that you are in a situation where you try to control someone or something. You need to stop first and realize that you are only able to control actions or reactions to the situation.
  2. “Let them”- accept the things/situation/people the way they are.

As I said, it is very easy and simple. How does it work? My favourite example, from my own life, is if your mother wishes to cook the holiday dinner instead of ordering from a restaurant…well, let her. (I love you Mom, you are the best! 😘) Instead of sitting around us and having fun, she does the Christmas dinner… we can just order from a restaurant, which would save time and energy for her, but this is very important for her to do it, so I have to let her be. Will I ever agree on this? Nope! But instead of arguing about this thing, I just let her do what is best for her.

Or the typical toilet seat argument… up or down? Come on?! Doesn’t matter… just let them down… or up. 😉 But we all know when colleagues go to drink after work and they do not invite you. Let them. If it is important to you to spend time with them outside of work, you can organize a drink too. I see that we are so different and we do not agree with many things, but instead of trying to change someone just let them be themselves. You can save so much time and energy by focusing on yourself and the way you like to experience this thing we call Life rather than just being upset that the people around us do not match the expectations we create. 

You can also use the “Let Them” theory to let people grow and fail. I know we wish to save the once we love to fail or have experiences that are not good for them, but if we do not let them, we steal them the opportunity to grow. I am not a parent, but I am lucky enough to have them in my life, also I have friends and family members who are parents and I see they try to save us from everything. It seems they know everything better, they try to control us and it is so hard for them just to let us live our lives and experience uncomfortable things. I get it. My friends say that I am a natural-born “protector”. I try to help everyone around me and protect them from having negative experiences. It took me so long to understand that everyone has to have their lessons. That’s how they learn to protect themselves in the future.

If you feel you are jealous about someone…again, “let them”. You have to let out this feeling from you. If you are jealous, it means you are not accepting the people and the way of Life how it is, so you need to let this. You are trying to control the people around you when you feel like this.

It is important to mention that there are some areas when we cannot “let them”. Here are the exceptions:

  1. Drinking and driving or if someone wants to do any other kind of dangerous thing. We DO NOT LET THEM!!! 
  2. Suicidal behaviour. ( I think this is something that I do not have to explain.)
  3. Discriminate others.

The “ let them” theory is not about that we let people walk over us, we can use it for our own “safety”. Protect our feelings, save energy instead of fighting all the time and help to understand people and ourselves more. It helps us to slow down, observe our reactions, find out our triggers and even have fun.

I do recommend you listen to Mel’s podcast and follow her on every kind of social media because she is brilliant. Also, if you want more info about my mentor, send me a direct message and I’ll give you her contact.

So now go, sparkle and (Spit)Fire up yourselves for the holidays and please “let them” instead of “fight them”! 😘 And if you wish, let me know how it helped you. 

Oh, and please don’t forget: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.😘

Happy Holidays Spitfires!!!!🎄😘

XOXO,

Krisz 😘

P.S.: Follow me here, on Instagram, Facebook, or Pinterest.

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

Appreciate small things

Hello, hello

I hope you enjoying the Fall. Here in Hungary, we are so lucky as the weather is still sunny and above 20 degrees, so it feels more like late Summer than Fall, but the leaves are starting to fall down and change their colours.

And that’s how I ended up with this subject. This Summer in London wasn’t the nicest. It was chilled, windy and not as hot as expected (at least not much above 20 degrees and definitely not enough sunshine for me). So when I relocated to Hungary, I expected, I would feel hot again next Summer, but I was wrong. Since I came home (end of August) the weather has been incredible just like my mood. My friends and family often joke that I am working with solar energy, because if the Sun is up and the temperature is around 20 Celsius, I can conquer the World two times a day, but if not… Well, I am grumpy and feel low energy. I just wish to stay at home and relax the whole day. 

I started to feel happier and grateful for small things. I didn’t realise in the past years how much weather affects ME. Of course, I knew, because there are millions of studies about the amount of daily light and all the connections between this and our energy level and how it affects our performance. However, I just noticed that I am calmer and things that bothered me, now really don’t matter any more. Because I feel better I started to notice small things. Like how grateful I am because of the weather or how lucky I am that I can bake again. ( That’s one of my relaxing states, but this is a story for another day.) I can walk in nature, see the Balaton, eat delicious food, my bicycle, the shops and the kind strangers. But mostly for the fact that I am with people I love. 

I am happy that I can see my family and friends whenever I wish to see them and I do not have to count days and calculate my holidays. I finally live my life… I finally have a life again. I do things I love and be with the people I love the most. That’s my definition of HAPPINESS. I am sure this word means other things to each one of us. What I realised during these past months is that I can have the best job ever, I can live in the most bubbling place in the world, I can have all the money (this is still one of the most important and who says money does not make you happy, trust me, that person has never been poor), without sharing with my loved once means nothing.

So basically what I wish to say today is that I need to be surrounded by people I love and when I have this, I can see the small things and be grateful. Honestly feel the appreciation and not just saying or writing. If you ever heard “fake it until you make it”, you know what I mean. Most of the big motivational speakers, positive gurus or anyone who tried to be a bit positive heard that. Just start to count and write your blessings and you will feel it soon. I did it for years. Every day I wrote in my diary or notebook the things, people, places, and everything that I can be grateful for in the past 24 hours. Monthly I wrote a list about everything, from the water to the air why I was grateful, but most of the time I felt nothing. Or if I felt anything, it was when something really good happened. For sure after a bit of time, I started to notice the small things, like a nice cashier and made me feel a bit better, but somehow most of my days I felt empty. On my bad days, I felt anxious and depressed, even if the cashier was the nicest person ever or if I had my favourite cake from my favourite place. Don’t get me wrong, because I know that bad days are important and it is perfectly normal if I am not happy all the time, but something was missing. I wasn’t surrounded by people I truly loved and I tried to force the gratitude. I forced myself to feel something with all those lists. I don’t say stop doing it, because they are useful, but if you don’t feel something, please leave it for the next day. If you write every day for hours and after the first 30 things (including your favourite activities or people) still feel empty, just leave it. Go back and start again the next day. My suggestion is that if you skip 3 days and still feel nothing, please sit down and try to find the root of the problem ( or ask for help, from friends, a therapist, or anyone you trust). But if you feel gratitude, feel the appreciation and you forget to write them, don’t worry, it’s okay if you live your life you do not have time to document every moment of it, the most important is the feeling.

And trust me the small things will be the most important. Such as your kids went to school on time and you weren’t in a rush. Or when you have time to drink your coffee before work while you are sitting on a bench in a park. Or the time you could spend with your family, the lovely weather in October. It could be anything.

My favourite “small things” from the last couple of months were the birthdays I managed to attend, the goodnight hugs from my loved ones, the games with my nephew ( I love the slides on the playground), the fireworks with my parent in Szigetvár, the morning sticky notes from my Mom when I was there, the mother-daughter days, the chats with my Dad in our garden, the furniture shopping and build up, the grapes, the view, the Balaton, the fact that I made it, I am home. I could tell you a million other things, but what I appreciate the most is that I FEEL the gratitude, I FEEL the love, I FEEL I am alive.

So please go out and FEEL the life, not just document it and if I ever can help with anything, please send me an email or message me on any social media platform and I am happy to SpitFire you up!

Be happy and don’t forget: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero. Also, follow me on at least one of the below. 😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Follow the blog on:

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

Zrínyi Days- Szigetvár

Hello Guys,

I hope you had a nice couple of weeks since my last post “Moved On”.

As I mentioned, I would like to introduce you to my “home town”, Szigetvár and its biggest event the Zrínyi Days. I was born in this small town, however, I grew up and my parents still live in a small village next to it. 

Szigetvár is in Baranya county, South-west Hungary, only 25-30 km far from the Croatian border. Around ten thousand people live in this place. This small town was significant during the 1500 years when Sultan Suleiman The Magnificent tried to conquer the world. His way was during my little town and in 1566 he attacked the fortress. Long story short, the head of the fortress Nicholas Zríny with only 2500 soldiers held the fortress for 34 days against the around fifty thousand Ottoman army. On 7th September 1566, when the fortress was on fire and Zríny could not hold it anymore, instead of surrendering, at dawn he and his only 300 soldiers left, he ran out of the fortress and they died as heroes. The Ottomans had a huge loss during the siege of Szigetvar and even when they got the fortress, the Sultan died and they had to retreat to the South, so their expedition to Vienna during Buda failed and they only could try to do it again in 1687, more than hundred years later. And that’s why Szigetvár celebrates every single year at the beginning of September the Zrínyi Days in honour of the heroes who died in the battle.

Since 1833 every year the town has organised these event series. There were several programs this year too. Including memorial ceremonies, theatres, concerts, gastronomical, children and tradition-keeping programs. Doesn’t matter how old are you, you will find something interesting. The program series started on 7 September and ended with the traditional fireworks on 10 September. The programs are around the whole city. The concerts took place in the city centre, the Zrínyi square, the theatres were in the Vigadó building, and the Attach was around the fortress. On Castle Street these days you can buy the best quality Hungarian handmade products, but if you love the funfair, you won’t be disappointed. There were so many folklore groups, Croatians (as Zríny wasn’t just Hungarian, he was also a Croatian Ban), Szigetvár has a brother town in Turkey too, therefore their tradition keepers came to visit and of course Szigetvár’s two Zrínyi folklore groups. On the last day of the program series after noon in every hour, you could hear an arsenal. Every hour as many shut as many hours until 8 pm when the ending ceremony started after the last gunfire.

I remember when I was a kid we always waited these days, especially Sunday’s closing day. Everyone around the town gathered together. The kids could watch the “battle” and after that, we had some chimney cake or cotton candy. But the most amazing was the closing ceremony. Everyone gathered together in the fortress, we listened to our National Hymn, the mayor had his speech, and when everyone was done, the “magic” started… the fireworks. It wasn’t as huge as the bonfire night at Alexandra Palace or the New Year’s Eve fireworks in London, but it was always the best because the family and friends were together.

After almost eleven years in London, I could visit the Zrínyi days and guess what… still these small fireworks are the most amazing, but this year it was special to me because it wasn’t just the closing day of the Zrínyi Days…nope… because it was the closing event of one of the most amazing weekend I could spend with my family without the nervousness that I have to leave them and with the feeling that I’ve made it. I made it to be there on my nephew’s first birthday and I made it to be there on my brother’s 30th birthday. Also, I made it to be there for the fireworks. I know it sounds cheesy, but this is the truth, We do not appreciate anything enough the small things in our lives… that’s why in my next post, I will bring up some small, but very important things from my life and talk about the differences between my lovely little village and London.

However, if you wish to know more about Szigetvár, trust me there are some programs and places to visit during the year, (even if there are no Zrínyi Days) such as the museum and the Turkish mosque in the fortress, the thermal bath, theatres or even just a few kilometres the Villányi wine yards, you can visit the town’s website here. 

I hope you enjoyed it and you will consider SpitFire up my little town in the future (Let me know if you coming and I am more than happy to guide you.) 😉

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Don’t forget: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero. Also, follow me on at least one of the below. 😘

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

Moved On!

Hello Guys,

I promised videos and constant posting, and I haven’t done it… I am sorry, but I was busy living my life. (I also know this is a perfect excuse, but this happened.) And what is “this”? Well, I’ll let you know soon, but now I would like to say thank you to all of you for all the support I have gotten from you during the almost two years since I first started this blog. The Spirit of Spitfire blog will be two years old next month.🥳

So these happened in the past two months since my last post: Chaos, boxes, packaging, playing with space, cleaning, fish and chips, flying, meeting new people, having fun with old ones and lots of “aunty duty”. And these are only a few of them. 

My best advice if you moving across countries is that: play so much Tetris (if you don’t know what it is, google it, my friend,  because you are not old enough to remember,  but it is the best help ever during the packing process.) Why? Because you will need to fill up all the gaps in every box you have. Trust me, I thought, it was easy to fill up boxes and wrap things. Also, I was so naive that I thought I could label boxes, such as “kitchen” and all the kitchen stuff would be in one box and it would be super easy to find everything. If you want to use all the spaces and want to be cost-effective here are my pieces of advice:

  1. Don’t book “move”, book only a few boxes or items each time, as the moving companies charge more if they have to do a “full move” and less if you send only items home(at least this is my experience regarding the move from London to Hungary).
  2. Please take time and find the best company and most of the time the most popular one, not the best.
  3. Use all the spaces in the boxes and write a label which contains everything that is in the box (even your slippers otherwise you will find yourself in my space… I still cannot find it, but I am sure I have it…maybe next to my cutleries?🤔)
  4. Pack your luggage a week before your flight, because I am 100% sure, you will find “a few” things that you want to take home with you, but remember, you have a weight limit. 🙄

After the last boxes left my home, I started to clean everything ( most of the time the landlords ask this and it is a criteria to have back your deposit, however my landlord didn’t ask this, but I cannot leave a dirty house behind me). I had to buy a new backpack and a small cabin bag too (obviously I needed bigger sizes that I already had… I know, I am a proper woman and still I forgot my fridge magnets. 😥) I felt so tired after everything and I thought I will sleep at least for a month. Thinking about everything during a move is so exhausting.

However the day came (27/08) and for the first time after almost eleven years, when my flight left the islands, I didn’t feel I left the “Alcatraz”, I felt I left my home… I left my life. And honestly, I did. Even if I came back to my home country, London and Great Britain were my home for almost eleven years… I knew I must do this and I must do it now, I have to open a new chapter.

I had to wait at the airport, but it was great, because after the 12 degrees, rain and windy summer in London, I felt 36 degrees, sunshine and blue sky… that’s how I arrived in Hungary. Also, I met nice people at the airport, so it was lovely to wait. 

I’ve been home for more than two weeks now and so far I like it. I know at the moment I’m still in my parents’ house and dressing in boxes, while I’m waiting to move to my flat at the Lake Balaton and I know it helps a lot that I can play with my nephew often, but so far I like it. Also, we celebrated during these two weeks, my nephew’s first birthday and brother’s thirtieth birthday doo and soon my Dad’s birthday is coming (yes, all the men in my family were born in September! 🤣) These are the things I would miss if I don’t make the decision to move on (and many more). I don’t have illusions, I am sure it will be hard times, but my depression and anxiety are much better since I’m around people who love me and whose I love too. 

So next time I will share with you an amazing event I’ve been to during the weekend, called Zrínyi Days. It will be a bit different post, as I would like to share with you a bit of the history of my home town and the reason why it is a big deal every year in our neighbourhood. Because London is amazing, Great Britain is beautiful and everyone knows how wonderful Budapest is, but trust me we have many more hidden gems in Hungary.

I hope you stay with me and together we SipFire up Hungary too. 😘 

Love you guys, and doesn’t matter where you are, never forget this: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.

XOXO,

Krisz 😘

P.S.: Follow me here, on Instagram, Facebook, or Pinterest.

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

Let’s move on

Hello Guys,

I hope you are doing well and enjoying the Summer. First I would like to apologise for the fact that I haven’t posted for a while now. I promise I have a very good reason and I will share it with you in this post.

I mentioned earlier that I´m working on a “big project”…well after more than 10 years living in London, I decided to relocate back to Hungary at least for a year. I know, it is shocking.😅 However, after soo many discussions with family, friends, and people I usually listen to, I decided that this is the best for me at the moment (or at least this is what I feel is the best). Lately, my friends are moved back to their countries, life in London changed a lot after the pandemic and my last visit at home during Christmas time woke me up. 

I usually wait for two things in the year and these two things are my holidays at home with my friends and family. I am the happiest when I am surrounded by them. I am laughing more, I feel better and I feel alive. 

My life in London became just a huge waiting time, while I have done nothing just worked, came home, eat, took a shower and sleep. Don’t get me wrong, I know it is my fault, but still, I was always tired and anxious. I became depressed, even though I had a nice career, and friends and I loved my life in London, I felt sad and lonely. Then I realised, I must change… drastically. First of course I had to start the change in my head and slowly turn my anxiety to hope, but still, I felt something is missing. I was wondering for years if I go back is just a run from my life, but after I moved into a nice place, I had a nice job and nice friends, I still felt this pull… the pull I haven’t felt in 10 years… the one that says, now you need to go and try. No matter what it will be, if you don’t try, you will regret it forever.

So I decided to relocate to Hungary. Why do I say relocate and not “move”? Simple brain hack. My anxiety and depression kicked in when one of my best friends at home ask me The Question: “So do you now move back to Hungary FOREVER?” Well… I started to sweat, I couldn´t bread, I felt I will die for sure… then I started to think… Do I want to move back forever? What if I change my mind? Do they all will be disappointed? Do I need to stay? What if I will change my mind? What if I will not like it after a year? All these questions just came into my mind at once… I felt tired, overwhelmed and to be honest, I just realised that I do not wish to move anywhere FOREVER. But I will buy a one-way ticket to Hungary and all my stuff will be transferred back… so technically, I will move back… and then I started to question everything (I know, again)… Is it really what I want or it is just an escape from my life? 

In the end, I figured out that nothing last FOREVER. I do not HAVE TO do anything. And my brain loves the idea that I go back for at least a year and once the year ends, I will see how I feel. I have a fully settled status in the UK, so in the next 5 years, I can come back anytime. My landlady and her family love me, so she said my flat will be available for me always, no matter who will live in it, they will take it out for me, and my workplace offered the same. 

So finally I decided to try. It wasn´t that quick and easy decision like it was 10 years ago to move here. First I started to think about it 4-5 years ago, we had soo many discussions with my friends here and there too about it, but in the end, I have two (a million others as well) very strong reasons why I do this: 

  1. As I mentioned in the previous post What is your “why”? My biggest why is my nephew. It was always hard to leave behind my friends’ kids, my parents, and my friends, but when I had to handle back my (at that time) 4 months old nephew…my heart was broken. I don´t want to be the aunty who just sending sh@ts and never there. I want to be there for him and never miss any birthdays or Easterns or any other occasions.
  2. At some point, everyone has to grow up and take responsibility. I can live in London and years just come and go and I will be in the same place in my life as I was last year or the years before. My life in London is an extended teenage life. I am having fun, I have money to buy sh@ts, and I have a job, but at the end of the day, most likely I am alone. Almost everyone important to me is in Hungary or will be.

I love my life in London and possibly I will come back or I will go and live somewhere else in the World, but at the moment I feel I need to go home for a bit and see how it will work (or not) for me after more than 10 years living in abroad. 

So I will continue to write blog posts, don´t worry, just not that often until the end of August. But I do not wish you to miss my moving fun, I want to include you guys, so I am working on making short videos and uploading them here, on YouTube and all the social media platforms, so please follow the Spitfires. Also, I am planning to do some mini-courses about mental health, motivation and positive life set later this year, so please just stay with me. During my videos, I also concur with my fears (my first fear is to upload my first video and see how you like me or don´t) and also give you some tips regarding moving out of the UK with a positive mindset of course. Obviously from the end of August, I will show you places in Hungary. I will move next to Hungary´s biggest lake, called Balaton, so I will have enough to share with you and we will continue our positive SpitFirey journey together, only my physical location will change.

Last, but not least, I would like to thank you for all your support here on the blog and on the social media platforms too in the last few years. Hopefully, these videos will help me not just keep my English, but get to know you guys better. 

I will bring the first video soon, but until that, please remember: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.

XOXO,

Krisz😘

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

When life gives you lemon…

aka 5 ingredients to start making the Life Lemonade.

Hello Guys,

I hope you are all well and having so much fun, now the weather is getting better and Summer is slowly, but surely coming. 😊 I know I haven’t posted again for a while, but so many things happened and I did not feel to come and write about them. This blog is basically a positive blog, but in the last few weeks, I had ups and downs. Don’t get me wrong, nothing terrible happened, but things did not go the way I planned them (aka life happened). I did not want to share these with you, but after yesterday, I thought maybe it can help someone. Maybe my feelings at the moment can be the one thing that makes it easier for others. I don’t know, but even if you just laugh a lot, it was worth it to write down.

I am not going into details, because it would be so long and I do not wish to share everything, but I will tell my thoughts and feelings.

Did you ever have the feeling that you planned everything, it was a perfect plan, you worked for it so hard, harder than ever, and you made what you possibly can and even more… and all of a sudden, the end was a huge NO from the Life? You gave all your heart, you had a plan, and you had a huge why, so just swallowed everything for months and months, because you were sure that if you do, you get what you want. You were the most positive person ever, you felt, you got this, and you put all your heart into it, and in the end… nothing…even if you know for 100% you deserved it. When life gives you that famous lemon.

Well, after all the ups and downs during the last couple of weeks, that’s what I felt yesterday. I worked for something so hard, I gave all my heart, and the answer was no.  I felt so down and I was pissed off. When I stopped for a second of my own “inner drama theater” and finally let the “drama queen” rest in me, I realized so many things… and that’s why I write this post to you.

  1.  I realized that I do not feel sorry about the thing I did not get… The only thing I was sorry for is myself because all my plans went down into the loo.
  2. I didn’t even want that particular thing… I just wanted the easiness which came with it.
  3. I am the one who did not appreciate myself. I have expectations. Remember when I wrote about these things? Well, I did not read and took the bits of advice I just gave it to you guys. (I should probably read more often than write. 😅)

I found out many more things, but I thought these are the most important. So the question is what do I do with these things? Don’t get me wrong I am still not positive and that’s okay. It will take time (so much time), but at least I started to get better. So here are my 5 steps to start making the Life Lemonade:

  1. I accepted that it is okay to feel peace of shit at the moment- Take the Lemons what Life offered. (And yes, the Bridget Jones’ diaries with vanilla ice cream are absolutely acceptable in this situation, so go for it!!!! 😉)
  2. I felt all the feelings- Cut and squeeze the Lemons.

I cried, I was angry, I shouted out loud, I vent out my feelings, etc. Doesn’t matter what, you have to feel it. No one can be positive always and especially not when you feel you wish to have a dragon that can solve the whole problem with a word (dracharys). If you try to be positive in these situations when you feel down, you force yourself and you make a huge resistance, which will cause you a much bigger problem later. Also, it would not be positivity, it would be stupidity. Seriously, to smile even if you are swimming in the deepest shit is the stupidest thing ever.

  1. I released the negative feelings (at least I started to release them).- Add them to water.

A million ways you can do it, you can sit down and meditate or write it on paper, sometimes it is enough just to cry, or you can go for a walk/run, exercise, etc. It absolutely depends on the person.

  1. Find the lesson.- Stir it up.

I did find the lesson in my situation. Because remember: “Everything in life is either a blessing or a lesson.” If it is painful… well friends, it will be a huge lesson. Sometimes just your body tries to tell you to slow down, sometimes you just have to be patient. In my situation, my lesson is to learn to love and appreciate myself. We first have to give ourselves what we wish to receive from others. And we cannot love and/or appreciate others if we do not have these feelings in us.

  1. Counting my blessings to start to feel better. – Add some sugar (even some mint) for a better taste…and slowly start to enjoy.

I don’t want or try to be positive. Just want to feel myself better, so slowly I can start to feel okay again and then good, great, and happy. I do not rush. But to start and count your blessings can help, because doesn’t matter how hard life is now for you and I am sure my situation is so far from the worst, you always have something to be grateful for. I have a lovely family and amazing friends, I live in a very nice area, I am healthy and everyone who counts is healthy in my life. I have food (amazing food) to eat every day, I have a job, and I have money, which I did not really have 10 and a half years ago. The list goes on and on. You can write as much as you wish, no minimum or maximum amount. I think the more is the better, because at the beginning you will not have the feeling, but with each thing, you will start to gain the feeling too.

(Of course, we all have different tastes, so feel free to try new things, and other exercises, and mix the steps, as you like it. In the end, it will be your Lemonade.😉)

I want you to remember something, if you did not get what you want you will get something much better. No matter what you wanted, a better thing is coming. Even if you cannot see it yet, as I cannot see how it will be better, we must believe that it wasn’t meant for us, because something much bigger is waiting. The lessons are preparing us for something greater.

So grab your lemons, squeeze them, add some extra ingredients, spice it up with some SpitFire, and slowly it will become a very delicious Lemonade

XOXO,

Krisz😘

(P.s.: Mom, friends I am fine, do not worry! 😅

One more thing, I will start a 21-day mindfulness challenge on Monday. Each day, I will share on Facebook and Instagram daily lessons (easy one or two steps story posts, each step will not take longer than 5 minutes to do), so if you wish to do it with me, follow the Spitfires on one or both of the social media platforms.)

Categories
Egyéb kategória Positive quotes

Motivation

XOXO,

Krisz😘

Categories
Egyéb kategória Positive quotes

Do not stop

XOXO,

Krisz 😘

Categories
Egyéb kategória Positive quotes

Dear never greater than excitement

XOXO,

Krisz 😘

Categories
Egyéb kategória Positive quotes

Success

XOXO,

Krisz😘

Categories
Egyéb kategória This is how we do it!

Easter in Hungary

Hello, Bunnies

Happy Easter or Happy Bunny, as we usually say in Hungary! 🐰

Easter is one of my favorite holidays, not only because it is a four days weekend, but because finally, it is Spring. Flowers everywhere, colors, nature is waking up, the days are getting longer and the weather is starting to warm up. Easter is about rebirth, renewal, and the celebration of the colors. (At least to me.)

So many traditions attached to Easter depend on the family or which part of the country you goes. So I decided to talk about my family’s Easter traditions. When I was a kid, we always decorated the house and colored boiled eggs. My grandma did it with onion leaves and made them brown. Sometimes she used wax to draw on the eggs. At home, we bought some egg coloring kits with stickers, but either way, the end was beautiful and colorful eggs.

Saturday my mum cooked the ham and the eggs, as these are the traditional breakfast for Easter morning. Of course, she cooked and baked as well, because the family gathered together on Sunday for a lunch. Also we “built the nest for the Easter Bunny”. My brother and I went to the garden with one of our mother’s baskets and we collected some grass, to make sure the Bunny has the best and nicest place, so he could bring us lots of chocolates. (Back then usually the kids got mostly chocolates, toys, and some money from their grandparents. Now it is a bit different because Easter became Spring’s Christmas, and the kids get toys and of course money after a certain age.)

When Easter morning came we woke up we were so excited to see what the Bunny brought for us. Also, the family set down together and eat the traditional Easter breakfast. This breakfast contained ham, boiled eggs, horseradish sauce, some vegetables, and fresh bread. (It was funny because we grow up like we never really had breakfast, we just grabbed a cup of hot cocoa and ate first around 10 am, so the Easter breakfast was delicious, but we did not really a huge fan of eating in the morning. 😅) Usually this is the same everywhere in Hungary, mostly because of religious reasons, even if our family wasn’t really a religious family. As a Christian (even though I am not practicing my religion) Easter is a big celebration after 40 days of fasting, the first time you can eat meat. Especially on Good Friday, the meat was forbidden (good for vegetarians and vegans, less good for me.😅) As I said I do not really want to go to the religious side of the holiday.

So after we had our breakfast, we had a look at the nest and we were so happy and grateful that Bunny loved us and we always get something and then we waited for the rest of the family. Slowly arrived our grandparents and sometimes our uncle too. They all brought something for us and the nest just got full of goodies.

 At 12am we started our lunch. We always had chicken soup, breaded pork and/or chicken, stuffed meat, oven-baked meats with rice, mashed potatoes, some salads, and pickles. My mum always made at least 2-3 kids of cakes and grandmas brought their creations too. Yes, we were so full, so the rest of the day we just enjoyed the sunshine outside our garden and talked about everything. As kids, we played with the new toys and had so much fun.

Easter Monday is much more interesting in Hungary. This day is known as “Shower Monday” too. Every woman gets sprinkled or showered with water or perfumes and men get colored eggs, chocolates, or even money as rewards. The original tradition was actually that the boy shows his interest to the wed-aged girl like this. Always the single girls get sprinkled and no one else really. Somewhere if the boy got a basket (not only eggs) in return that showed he is the chosen one and even the girl’s family blessed his interest and after that, they were allowed to start “dating”. 

Nowadays it is a bit different but still, women get their sprinkles/showers, but now doesn’t matter their age and marital status. Actually, if you are a man and you want peace in the house, you just shower every woman.😀 The “belief” is in Hungary that the woman must be showered “locsolni”, otherwise they will get wither, just like the flowers. The boys go around the village or in the city neighborhood and usually, they use perfumes to sprinkle, but somewhere (mostly in the villages) still water is preferred. This is the man’s choice, and these days girls give them money instead of eggs or baskets. The boys create some nice or sometimes funny verbs where they “ask” the girl if she allows the sprinkles (not that a girl really has a choice 😅), and these verbs make the tradition funnier.

I always wanted to be a boy on this day. My brother was so shy and he just sprinkled the women in the family, he never went around the village, but he doubled his pocket money on this day. On the other side… well until the end of the day, I get wet (come on!) and I had at least 5-6 different perfumes smell mixed up on me and I couldn’t wait to go home (usually Easter Monday we celebrated in my grandmother’s house) and wash my hair. 

But still, I love Easter and all of those traditions. I think especially after we grow up, we forget the fun and Easter can be a very fun day. 

Some families or sociates in Hungary make Easter games for the kids, such as eggs painting, contests, “find the eggs competition” (hide the eggs or chocolates around the place and kids have to search for them) or my favorite was the egg rolling game (whose egg went farthest was the winner). Easter is mostly about the kids, but still, families gather together, eat and celebrate. 

I hope you will have a lovey Spit(firey)Easter and the Bunny brings you so much fun, love, and sweets.

And don’t forget during the big celebration, that you are a Hero, no matter what!😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Question, comment, or anything, just follow me on Facebook, Instagram, or here.

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

3 steps, and you have a price tag

Hello, hello

I hope you had a lovely week and had so much fun. As I mentioned in my previous post, I started to write this post and I was almost done, but then life happened and I re-wrote it. Don’t worry, I still write about the price tags, how, when, why, and what to do with those (little) buggers. I will share my 3 steps technique. 😎

We all know that if you want to buy something, you will get a little tag on it with the price. That’s normal when you go shopping. Doesn’t matter if it is clothes, shoes, groceries, electronics, or any other stuff, it will come with a price tag. We also know that nothing is free in the world. We pay for our internet, electricity, gas (for the last two we pay a lot nowadays), hairdresser, cosmetics, nail technician, gym, etc. So we pay for everything that we want. And these things are normal and we do not even think about these tags, because we know these are the “extras” and we learned at a very young age that we have money, so we pay for the things we buy exactly the amount that is on these little tags. (Unless you are in Hungary in the market, there you must negotiate the price Baby! 😅)

What are the price tags? Of course, we know that these things will tell us how much it cost the desired item or service we wish to have. Simple, easy, and common sense. No one needs to think about how much a new dress will cost (which by the way you need because you do not have anything to wear on Saturday night when you go out with the girls… that’s obvious), because there is the price tag and you can decide by the price if it is worth it for you or not (guess what, the new dress will worth the price and no, doesn’t matter the numbers, trust me). And we all know this, but there is something that no one teaches us in school, no one explains and everyone assumes that you know…everything comes with a price tag means, literally EVERYTHING, even your dreams and especially your goals.

The question is never whether you will have to pay for your wishes or not…no. The question is always: how much? But with our dreams, goals, and desires it is tricky because you cannot find a price tag that will tell you that, if you decide to chase your dreams means you will not see your family for maybe at least 1,5- 2 years, do you want this? No. No one will provide a price tag for those things, but trust me you will get them sooner or later. So how do you know the price tag, if no one telling you? How you can decide if your price tag is worth it or not? Well, that’s why when you set up a goal, you have to set up a price tag too. Otherwise, if you wait for Life/God/Universe to give you one… well, I am 99% sure you will not like it, but far worst, you will hate it as hell. Life always tests us. Just like a mother testing their child if they are sure they want pizza for breakfast (yes, for breakfast, and yes they will want it), Life will test you the same way. It will ask you if you are sure you want that desired thing. Also if we think about it is easier than with the other things in our life, because if you go to the grocery store and they say the milk’s price is xyz, you buy the milk for that price and you are not able to change it (okay, I know you can buy in another store, or find the cheapest in elsewhere, or go to the Hungarian market and negotiate, but please stick to the theory). However, you can decide how much will cost your goals, and how much you are willing to pay for them. Also, you can increase or decrease the amount, at any time.

So the last question is, how do we set up our dreams’ prices? (We already decided what we want, and we have our “why” too, furthermore we even brainstormed what things will make us happy, so that could be indicators as well.) How I do, it when I set up a price for my goals, is super easy. Only 3 steps.

  1. I take a piece of paper and write everything that I think I will have to do to achieve my goal. Everything. Even the smallest things. I usually do not stop until I have at least 50 items on my list, that’s the minimum and no maximum. (brainstorm)
  2. Once it is done, I will start to rate them from 1 to 10 on how likely I will want to do the thing. 1 is for me the “No, Not at all, Never Ever” and 10 is the “Hell yeah! Let’s do this Baby!”
  3. When  I have the rated list, I will just summarize the things which were rated between 8 and 10. To make sure it is clear. After that just mark 3 or 5, so you will not feel overwhelmed and you most likely will do those 3-5 things. Guess what? Those things will be your goal’s price tag.😘

Do you see? I told you it is very easy. Okay so let’s see an example from my past and then I will let you have fun with your own price tags. So during the pandemic, I decided to lose weight. Not because I was fat, but because I wanted to be healthier and in better shape. I knew I wanted to lose at least 5kg (sorry guys, you convert it for yourself, I can’t and don’t want to please everyone😘). (I have done the 7 levels of deep, below the “What is your “why”?” post, someone asked me for an example from me regarding this exercise and shared there in a comment my “why?” for this.)

  1. I have set down and listed everything that I thought I could do to get the result. For example, exercise 2 hours a day, lift weights, eat more vegetables and fruits, leave bread, no pasta, no sweets, no hamburgers, drink at least 2l water a day, sleep at least 8 hours, etc. The list was soooooo long. 
  2. Sleep, drink water, eat more healthy stuff: Absolutely 10, “Hell yeah!” I will do those things, I love them. Easy baby!😎 But no pasta, no bread, no sweets?!?!?! NOOOO. “No, Never Ever!!!” 😱
  3. Last step, to make sure I will not feel overwhelmed and exhausted, I made a list that every day I will drink 2l water, sleep at least 8 hours, and eat healthier, but I will count calories (eat everything, but make sure smaller portions), Sunday is my cheat day, so I can eat sweets and exercise a lot (which is easy for me because I am still hyperactive). 

This was my price tag. I could and would pay this price to lose weight. I can confirm that I did. In 6 months I lost 5kg without suffering because I find my way, the way was fit for me and I knew what the price would be and I was willing to pay it. 

Also very important as I always say, to listen to yourself. This exercise helped me to set up my goals or achieve them, but may it will not be yours. I have tried many other things until I found the techniques which work for me. So try it and if it works, fine, if not, well don’t worry, there are millions of other exercises. You just need to find the one which will fit you. Oh, and you can change it just as the shops do with their prices… either you can raise or lower down. No limits and no failure if you feel that something is not worth it anymore.

Now, come on, GOOOO, and set up your goals’ price tags, but before you start don’t forget to (Spit)fire up yourself.

Love you guys and make sure you know that: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Any questions, or concerns, please DM me on Instagram, or Facebook or just leave a comment. Love you all! 

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

Dolce far niente

Hello!!!!!

I know it’s been two weeks since my last post and I promised I would share some tools to get out of feeling burnt out, but life happened. Actually, I started to write about the price tags last week and I am almost done so that you can read it soon, but first I wanted to talk about doing something really important from time to time for our perfect healing. It is “Dolce Far Niente”. 

I know you are confused and you think I am actually crazier than ever (except if you are one of my Italian friends or readers because I am sure you guys are laughing so hard). That’s okay. I started to learn Italian. Actually, I am very good at the cookies’ names now, which is so hard because I have to try a lot to know about their meanings, but everything for learning.😅 As you all know I love Italy and everything that is Italian, but this came from totally elsewhere. And I confused you more.😅Sorry, this is when ADHD hits during writing. Let me clear the air. 

Last Sunday I woke up after a really nice and relaxing sleep and I felt I want to do nothing. Not because I was sad or depressed, no. I actually just wanted to have one PJ day. I haven’t had it since a long time ago and I just felt I want to stay in my bed, watch movies, and not even bother to dress up. Then I felt the guilt. I am sure you all know the feeling. You want to do nothing, but you have miles-long to-do lists. Clean the house, cooks something for dinner, walk the dog, take care of your kids, maybe do some laundry, etc. I know just as my list goes on and on and on and always came new things, as yours too. I was hesitating. I should come out of bed and do my million tasks, because on Monday I will have to go to the office again (okay, I am lying now, because my Monday was off last week, but that’s another different story) and when I arrive home, I feel so tired and the lists of the excuses are the only longer list than my to-do list. So I felt guilty and lazy. I have projects in my life and if I stay one day in my bed, I waste so much time actually doing something to feel better and achieve my goals.  (We talked previously about what is the difference between being lazy or you give yourself the necessary time to heal, but we will later on for sure.) I started to panic as well, so total chaos and it was five minutes after I had my coffee. And then the miracle happened. I realized the most important tool I have to share with you first is “Dolce Far Niente”. (Also I have to use it in my life.)

I love Eta, Pray, Love movie, not just because they happened to be in the most beautiful places in the World or because Julia Roberts is one of my favorite actresses…no. I love this movie (and the book too) because it teaches you basic lifehacks. Unfortunately, not all of us can hit the pause button and just quit our life for a year to travel around the world and find ourselves, but if you watch the movie, you can discover so many lessons. 

And one of the most important is “the sweetness of doing nothing”. That’s what dolce far niente means. Of course, Italians are the masters of it, but we can learn as well. And if we wish to be healthy we should. I don’t say that you leave your kids behind and go for a weekend alone to rest. Not everyone can afford it or do it, but I say that you should have at least 1-2 hours each week when you don’t do anything and do not feel guilty. If you can have a day even better. To have time with yourself is just as much important then to get the tools and doing the actual work. You have one life, do whatever you like to do, what makes you feel happy. Of course, until you not hurting other people around you. I don’t say you should quit your life, we all have responsibilities but start to think about what you really want, what you enjoy.

You know what? This is today’s tool kit, called brainstorm. Take a piece of paper and write down everything you like in your life. Every single thing that makes you happy. List what makes you excited. Everything. We have five main aspects of our life: Social, financial, mental, physical, and emotional. This is the exercise. So simple. Just write down each category and write next to them what makes you happy. Once it is done, you will feel better and you know where to start your healing process. Circle three things (the most important ones in the category) and start to focus on how you can make them more.

This is how you will enjoy your life, this is how you will enjoy the sweetness of doing nothing. Because you need it. Everyone needs it. So guess what I have done last Sunday? Yes, you are right, nothing and I enjoyed all the minutes of it.😊

We don’t always need to overcomplicate our lives, just listen to your soul/instincts/gut, and it will tell you what you need. And if it says that you need to do nothing…well, who you are to question the big Universe/God/Mother Earth/ All Living? Put your hands on it and enjoy your gelato. 

Oh, and don’t forget: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Any questions, or concerns, please DM me on Instagram, or Facebook or just leave a comment. Love you all!

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

What is your “why”?

Hello

As I mentioned in my previous posts I burnt out and I am working on getting back on track. I shared with you my 4 steps to start and also I talked about people pleasing. However, days passed and my motivation started to lower a bit and that’s when I realized that I forget to tell you the power of “why”. It must be a reason behind every plan, every goal, and everything that we do. And that’s what I call “my why”. ( Not just me, many other and much clever people call it this.😅) 

What is the “why”? Why is it so important? How you can find it? 

Let’s start with the what. It is the reason for your actions. It can be absolutely anything from love, kids, money, wealth, fame, and health, to even your own nephew. (Yes, he is my biggest reason nowadays, but let’s talk about this later.) Doesn’t matter what you are doing in your life, it is a reason behind it. From waking up to going to sleep, there is a reason. The most important is when you identify your goals and write them down, you know why you want them. You must have a powerful reason to achieve your goals otherwise when Shit happens (and it will trust me), you just simply give up and you will be in the start again…sooner than later. You must identify what makes you do what you do, so you will be able to create plans to make sure you do the steps to achieve the goals.

Why is it so important? It is important because as my favorite motivational speaker says all the time: “motivation is garbage”. (Mel Robbins) When you identify your goals you feel full of energy and you can concur the World with only one breath. But days come and go and it will be days when you don’t even want to get up from your bed, and definitely don’t want to take steps toward your goals. Motivation will leave you. And that’s when you need to look at your “why”. If this is not strong enough, you will most likely leave your goals and they will only become dreams. Also when you have a why, you can start to set up what you are willing to do to achieve it. Because my friends everything comes with a price tag. The only question is how much you are willing to pay for what you want, and how strong is your why.

How you can find your “why”? Well, we all think it is easy. Obviously, we know why we want to be rich or why it is so important to our health. We all know why we want the perfect shape or why we want to be a CEO. But do we really know? Most of the time we think we do know, or at least that’s what we think until we do a very simple exercise. It calls 7 levels deep. 

This exercise came from another brilliant motivational speaker and life transformer person, I really admire, Dean Graziosi. The book where he introduced this exercise is called Millionaire Success Habits. This is a must-read book for everyone who wants to transform their life. Since this exercise was introduced, many other people use it and you can find it on the internet, just simply type “7 levels deep exercise”. It is free and you can download it from so many places like here. In my opinion, it is a very powerful tool and makes so much clarity on why you want what you want.

As I mentioned previously my nephew is my biggest “why” at the moment. I am working on a huge project in my life this year (I promise once I am there I will let you know) and hopefully the outcome will be spending more time with my family and especially with my nephew. So every time when I struggle or feel down, I know it is worth it, because of my “why”. When I have first done the 7 levels deep questionnaire, I thought I know why I want what I want, but in the end, I found out that my reason is deeper and more complex than I thought. 

During the next couple of weeks and months, I will share with you techniques, exercises, and tools that helped me during the years to be more positive, more balanced, and achieve my goals. I will share with you during these posts how these things helped me to become an office worker from night cleaning in London, to survive tough times, and stay the girl from the village who I always was and will be. 

I really hope these posts will help you too and (Spit)Fire you up.

Oh, and please don’t forget: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

3 Steps to stop being a “people pleaser”

Hello,

One week ago I wrote about how I burnt out and started to “come back” as usual. I shared my 4 steps to begin the journey, however, if you do not find the root cause of your burnout, it will return. It can be millions of reasons why, but that’s something, you will have to find out for yourself (remember: sit down and just ask questions, and your brain will answer). What I wanted to talk about today is one of the most common reasons, what I saw in my inner circle…and that’s my friends: people pleasing. 

What is “people pleasing”? Well, did you ever experience someone asking you something, someone who is important in your life (can be a family member, your boss, a friend, doesn’t matter) and you really didn’t want to do that thing, but you did it anyway? That’s “people pleasing”. You know when you feel you need rest, but your mother calls you to go to the family dinner on Sunday, while your plan was just to be in your bed and watch Netflix. Or, when you do not want to dress up to go to the shop, but you do it anyway, because of what the people will say in the village. Or, you do not have time and capacity to do another task, but when someone asks you, you do it anyway, because you want them to like you. When you push yourself and your needs in front of another (not because you want to, only because you feel you have to), that is “people pleasing”. Or trying to be perfect.

(Let’s make something clear.  We don’t talk about the situations when your parents or partner ask you to take out the rubbish or clean your room/house or the cooking is your turn… that’s laziness and you know it, so I just want to make sure that this post will not be an excuse next time when they will ask you.😅)

Why do we do that? Why do we want to be perfect for everyone around us?  First thing first, we all do that from time to time, (someone more often than others), so don’t be hard on yourself. Based on my experience, based on my and other people’s research (listen to Mel Robbins’s podcast about it, or read her book, just to mention one person who is an expert on this subject) we all do it because of our fears. 

From what do we fear? They will not accept us, they will judge, their opinion, how they will see us, etc. We can call it how we want, but guess what? We all basically want to be loved. So we do everything to make sure that people will love/like us. We try to be perfect, we pretend that we are who we are not, just to make sure that we make others happy, so we can get their love. You are afraid to say NO because you will feel guilty that you put yourself in front of others. Because in our society there are 2 types of people: either selfish or people pleaser. No middle way. You want to make sure that everyone gets what they want around you, so they are happy and they love you. Let me tell you something. This is absolutely my experience. BULLSHIT! If someone loves you, will love you even if you say no sometimes. These people will love you no matter what and the funny part is that they want you to be happy just as much as you do want them to be happy. So if you do what they ask but in the meantime, you are exhausted, anxious, and depressed, they will not be happy, because they cannot see the happiness in your eyes. 

I read this, heard this, and watched this so many times and in so many places, but for me, this was one of the most important lessons I have learned in my life: If you are not happy, you are not able to make others happy. First, you have to be happy, so you have happiness in your heart and you can give it to others. You cannot give something that you don’t have. Do you want your kids, family, your partner, your friends, your boss, your colleagues, and your neighbors to be happy? Be happy first and they will be happy because you are happy and if you are happy you are able to give love. It will not work in the opposite way. Your “love tank” needs to be full first.

Okay, I know now so many of you say “yes, but in this case, we will be selfish”. Yes, you have to be a bit. But my opinion of taking care of ourselves until we do not hurt others is just self-care. You have to take care of yourself and love yourself to be able to live and give it to others, so if you don’t make any damage to others, is it really selfishness or is it self-care? You see, huge difference.

Okay, so how do we stop to be a “people pleaser”, but not become selfish? I have my 3 “exercises” I usually do (but as you see, I burnt out too, so sometimes I forget to use these things, and that’s okay. We are human and we are not and don’t have to be perfect- we can’t).

  1. Questions. Ask yourself questions. “Do I really want this? Is it really good for me? Am I lazy or it is legit why I don’t want XYZ? What can I do today to make me happier? What is important to me? Do I hurt anyone, if I don’t XYZ?”- You will feel it. Your brain will start to search for the answers and you will feel and know the right answers for you.
  2. Say NO! You can, you should and you are allowed to say NO. I know this is hard sometimes and you feel the guilt, but you must. I don’t say to start an argument and shout. No! Just tell to the person how you feel. In the beginning, when you start to create your boundaries, people will test you. Life will test you. Sometimes you would say yes, just to avoid the conflict and let yourself be, but if you do it, you will feel tired again and you can start everything from the beginning. You will learn to love yourself if you can hold your boundaries. (FYI: The people who love you, will understand and continue to love you. But it will be hard because some of the people who do not love you enough will be left from your life.)
  3. Do something that makes you happy every day. Don’t care about what others would say, or how stupid it sounds, just do it. Something, anything. Doesn’t matter just makes you smile. Be silly, be crazy, and be yourself. (I know it is hard because people want you to be yourself, but “please not that much”. It will be a different post for sure.)

At the end of the day, the most important person in your life should be you, because when you are in your bed, you are alone with yourself (even if someone sleeping next to you). If you are not happy, do you really FEEL happiness about the fact that you made everyone else happy? Be honest with yourself.

Well, I hope it helps guys. I am with you and we stepping together to get back our (Spit)fire. 😘

Don’t forget: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: (This post is based on my experiences and what I see around me, but please know I don’t think it is the TRUTH, every one of us is different. May what makes sense to me, it will not make any sense to you.)

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

4 Easy steps to come back

Hello, hello

I know, I haven’t posted for a while. I am sorry, but I had to have a break from everything and everyone. I spent the holidays with my family and it was absolutely lovely. But since I came back to London, my life became so crazy. No lights, dark days, and lots of work. I realized that I burned out.

In the past months, I have just done my work, came home, eaten, and slept. I have done nothing. I was so tired, sleepy, and grumpy. I turned on the survivor mode. My energy level went down. So I had to turn it off. I know everyone is surprised and trust me, I was too.

I am a hurricane. I was and still am, a very energetic, organized, enthusiastic, positive, and absolutely hyperactive woman. So it hit me so hard that I don’t have energy, I didn’t want to do anything, just sleep. I thought something is wrong with me and I had no idea how can I come back again and be myself. I know it sounds weird, but I love to be a hurricane, with millions of plans, and tasks, and never sit down and be calm. It took me so long to accept that I am like this and that this is normal because this is me. Also, it was so hard to accept that from time to time we all burnt out. This is normal too. 

Well, you know me now, so you know that I am not a patient person. I get what I want because I will never rest until I get it. So the past months were suffering because I knew I want to be myself again, but I did not have the energy. Guess what? It is normal too.

I thought it is important to tell you that sometimes we all need to have rest. Slow down and just be. It is normal that we are not positive all the time. It is normal to be grumpy, negative, and tired. We need to give time to ourselves. Need time to feel these things too, because that’s the only way to rise again, to get back our energy level and go again. You are not less positive, you are a human. 

I am sure I told you this, but to be positive doesn’t mean that we always smile, happy and three meters above the clouds. It doesn’t mean that we don’t have bad days, we cannot be tired and have enough of the whole world. It doesn’t mean that sometimes we don’t give a shit and just f@ck for the fairytales. Life is a journey, with ups and downs. If we do not have the downs, we cannot appreciate the ups. Simply because we don’t know the difference. To experience and fully live the good, we have to get the inconveniences too. 

What made me realize this, how I stand up again, and why now? Funny. I think this week was the worst. On Wednesday, I went to the office and I felt so sleepy. Literally, I could sleep while I was standing. And it hit me on my face… my friend told me that something is really wrong with me because I am not complaining. F@CK! There it was. Just hit me. I have done nothing since I came back from my holiday, just complaining and feeling sorry for myself. 

How did I get back to my normal? I didn’t…at least not yet. Life is not like this. One day you’re down then the other day, you kick your ass and you’re back in the clouds. That’s bullshit. I am not a hypocrite, I thought that it should work like this. I had to realize that it is a process. It took me months to be this down emotionally, so it will take me some time to get back on track. 

BUT, this is a positive blog, so I will share with you how I started. (This is not the first time in my life when I am totally down, so I have my method for this situation.)

  1. Accept. This is the first and the hardest step, but the most important as well. You have to swallow all your pride (trust me, I am one of the most stubborn people ever, so I know how hard it is) and accept that something is wrong and that’s okay.
  2. Sit down. Take time to sit down and find out what is wrong. If you want to solve a problem, first you have to identify the actual problem. It can be more than one. Just find out. Identify the problem(s). 
  3. Plan. Don’t need to be a big plan and please give Life (God/Universe/ Mother Earth, etc.) a chance to give better. But have a plan. That will be a guide. Needs to be written. You should have a “deadline”(realistic and it can be flexible) too. Break it down for days, weeks, years, etc. (What is not written is not real. If you write down your dreams, breaking them down, they will be goals and most likely you can achieve them.)
  4. Do the first step. As I said you cannot back to 100% from -100% in one day, so just find out what you can do NOW. It is important that you have to do something immediately. (Simple psychology. Lots of studies prove that immediate action is a brain hack that helps you feel small success as you have done something to be better, but does not overwhelm and scare you, so you most likely continue.) Work for it every day.

Step by step. Just be patient with yourself. And don’t forget, it is okay. So kick your ass, get the spark from your (Spit)fire, and just do it! 😘

Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.s.: Quotes will be back in March. 😎 Don’t forget to follow the Spitfires on Facebook, Instagram, or here. 

Categories
Positive quotes

Merry Christmas to everyone! 🎄😘

XOXO,

Krisz 😘

Categories
Egyéb kategória This is how we do it!

Santa is coming tonight

Hello, hello…

…or should I say Hohohohoooo?! 🎅

I know some of you are just looking at the title and have no idea what I am talking about because today is only the 5th of December. Let me explain to you and I promise until we finish here you will go and clean your boots (okay, sneakers will work too 😉). Okay, now, I am sure you lost (except if you are from Hungary).

So I know most of the world celebrates Christmas and Santa brings presents on the 25th of December…well not in Hungary. Don’t worry, we have Christmas and we get presents too (in my family we open the presents on Christmas eve), but in Hungary Jesus brings the presents and the Christmas tree too on Christmas eve (yes, we do not decorate the Christmas tree until the 24th of December’s afternoon)… so now you wonder, what we do with Santa?!

Well, we do nothing with him, but he brings us presents on the 6th of December night. I do not wish to explain the whole history of this tradition, because is more religious and I do not want to mix this here, but I can explain the actual tradition. 

So in Hungary (and some of the other European countries too) at this time, the kids are cleaning their boots and preparing them for the night. On the 5th of December evening, we had to clean our boots and leave them in the window before we get ready for bed. We had to make sure that they are nice and shiny and left them in the windows to make sure that Santa easily can find them During this magical night Santa picks up his sleigh and all his reindeer (we are not that weirdo, we call them on the same name the same as the rest of the world does) and deliver the presents to the kids. Fill up the boots with lots of nice things. Nowadays the kids get maybe some small toys too, but the original tradition is that Santa only brings sweets and chocolates (in my grandparents’ childhood was a bit different, they had fruits, sweets, and nuts)…lots of chocolates. During this time of the year, you can buy small packs full of different kinds of sweets or you can make them your own (the only must-have is the Santa figure) or just leave the goodies as it is in the footwear. But one thing is sure, everyone gets something…

…and here you can ask “what about the bad kids”. Well, the bad kids don’t get anything or they only get “sorghum” (I am not sure you have a proper word for this thing, so you can see a picture of it below). Actually, still, today parents threaten their kids during the year (or should I say blackmailing?) with the fact that if they do not behave or be nice, Santa will not give them anything or they will get only a big bounce of sorghum. (Let’s make something clear, I have it sometimes, but because I was a bad kid… I was always cheeky. Just for clarity.😋)

The week of the 6th of December Santa goes to schools, kindergartens, and nurseries (even into the Library in Hobol, search for it!) and brings small presents and chocolates to the kids (szaloncukor, it is a traditional Hungarian bonbon only for Christmas). The kids decorate the houses, and the institutes, and sing songs to Santa when he arrives.

As a sweet tooth, this is one of my favorite traditions. And the answer is YES, I cleaned my boots already. 😉

So have fun, clean your boots and if you were good enough during this year, maybe you will find something in your footwear tomorrow morning.😘

Love you guys and Happy Santa day for tomorrow!🎅

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: For the daily quotes and more fun, please follow the Spitfires on Instagram and Facebook (find as spiritofspitfires).💖

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

Expectations

Hello everyone,

I hope you are relaxing and starting to be excited about Christmas (ps.: I still love all Griches too, no discriminations here).

I have a lot going on in my life nowadays and I just started to wonder why I do all my relaxing stuff and still, sometimes I feel down and a bit sad. (Nothing wrong with it, because no one is always happy and all over the moon, but still I didn’t understand what is happening.) This time of the year is my favorite. The preparation for Christmas, the lights, the smells, the decorations, the waiting time, the activities and London looks like a big Wonder Land. So I started to feel weird, why I was not happy and excited as usual… and then it hit me on my face. Expectations.

I had a look around me and inside me and then I realized we all expect something from everyone and everything. All our life is about expectations. 

The saying is true: nothing is for free. Even for love, we expect to return some love and if we do not get it we seek it and beg for it (that’s another story). We expect our parents to love us, and our friends to check on us sometimes. We want our colleagues and bosses to appreciate our work, also we wish the cashier will be nice in the shop, and the product we bought will be perfect for the price we paid for it. We have expectations from women and men as a society. We expect leaders to look and behave in a certain way. We want our favorite movie star to be always perfect and act kind. We wait for our partner to remember our birthdays, anniversaries, and all occasions.  And the list just goes on and on. We are fighting and argue with each other because we wish people around us to be how we imagine them they should be. The worst is about expectations that we think we should get some reward for the effort we make to be someone who we think we should be to get the reward.

Don’t get me wrong, I am one of the luckiest people ever, because I have got lots of love and appreciation in my life, but still I am not an exception. 

So I started to list what I am expecting and most importantly from who. Yes, there are lots of people I interact with on a daily basis, so I had to let go of what and how I wish them to deal with me. People are different and that makes life wonderful. What made me surprise the most that I have so strong imagination for how people should act who are my closest ones. If someone knows me, know that I do not trust that many people, but if I do, I would do everything (literally everything) for, and to them. So that’s why surprised me when I felt a certain way for the people I love. I had to accept that even my loved ones are not perfect and they have every right to live their life as it is the best for them. Even my parents, my friends, and my family. Everyone has the right to choose what is best for them.

The other hit on my face was an even bigger slap. I am not just expecting people, products, and situations to be in a certain way… I have the biggest expectations about myself. Even when I feel down, my first thought was that why I do not feel a certain way, my feelings shouldn’t be like this. Should or shouldn’t. I never liked these two words because I felt the pressure that people want me to be someone who I am not, and I am not enough good. And yet, after 33 years I realized that actually, I am the one who built up those expectations. No one wants me to be perfect, on top all the time, happy, or million other things. 

What I realized is that because of our expectations and the way we see our life “should be” make us unhappy and do not realize the good things around us. Do not need to be big things…or actually, everything is a big thing that makes us happy, grateful, lucky, loved, etc. I don’t say that we cannot do our best, we must try to do it, but be aware of our limitations. It is totally fine not to be happy or feel a bit sad about things. 

Perfect doesn’t exist guys. Perfect for me exist, but perfect me?! Never. We all are human and like this, we are imperfectly perfect. All of us. Just the way we are. I believe that we are always at the right time, in the right place with the right people. May we not agree and cannot see it yet, but at the moment it is the best and it is how it “should be”. Don’t get me wrong, I still learning to let go of my expectations and just simply be happy with what I have gotten every day from life, from the people around me.

One last thought before I leave you to just relax, as it is still November (yes, even if it is the last evening of it). Letting go of your expectations does not mean you have to let go of your wishes. Just simply communicate with the people around you. Nothing wrong with it if you tell people what you want or how you want them to deal with you. No one is a mind reader, so you must tell people what is good for you (of course in a nice way), what makes you feel appreciated, loved, and not taken for granted.

I heard a very true saying from one of my kindest friends: “Be the most selfish person ever and do not let go a little from it, but make sure you do not hurt anyone around you! This calls balance!”

I wish you a really nice evening and time to prepare for the holidays. I am back soon with some Christmas traditions cheer up!!!! 😃

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: For the daily quotes, please find the Spitfires on Facebook and or Instagram. 

Categories
This is how we do it!

5 tips to SpitFire up your mornings

Hello Guys,

As I promised, November is about relaxing and preparing for the winter. I wish to help you to make ready for the crazy, busy holiday season, the end of the year, visiting family, having Christmas parties, and all the fun things that require a lot of energy from us. Yes, we must prepare our minds, body, and soul for all these. My philosophy is to do everything step by step. That’s the best way to set up and achieve our goals too.

All story starts at the beginning, and so do our days. The morning routine is very important because how you start your day will be the foundation of your whole day. Very important to set up our own, unique morning routine. I don’t believe in fixed recipes (it could explain my not always… let’s say like these “well-presented” cakes or foods🤔), so what works for me may not work for you and it is fine like this. We are all unique and that’s what makes life so wonderful. 

Okay, let’s get into it. 😉

  1. Set your alarm

Well, that sounds easy, but trust me, so many times, this is where everything will be decided. I use two alarms, with 10 minutes difference, because like this I have 10 minutes to think about the day ahead of me, visualize my goals, be grateful for my life, or just simply prepare my soul until I physically kick myself out of the bed. Another nice tip is from Mel Robbins and her 5-second rule, which is an amazing book and a more amazing technique to force yourself to do actions, in less than 5 seconds. The whole idea is that your alarm rings and you count back 5-4-3-2-1- GO! That’s it. No snooze or “please, just 5 more minutes, mama”. (I highly recommend her books and her podcast too, to get practical tips without sugarcoating. Also, you can use the 5-second rule before every kind of decision in your life.)

  1. Coffee, coffee, coffee, and water

First things first, water. Water helps to wake up your body and of course after a nice (minimum) 8 hours of sleep you will be dehydrated, so you need it first. Someone just drinking a glass of water and that’s it. Someone is a tea or smoothie person. What works for you, Babe, no judgment here. But if you want to communicate with me and wish me to operate as a normal human being…well, better give me a coffee in the morning. 

I love to do my coffee because that’s another opportunity for me to think about my day, organize my tasks in my head, and enjoy the wonder of a sunrise or everything that I want. My soya-cinnamon-honey cappuccino is a guarantee of a perfect start to the day. 

  1. Write in my journal

That part of my morning is important because that is the time, when I sit down, drink my coffee, and let myself relax, feel what I have to feel, let go what I have to let go and also summarize the previous day. Usually, I am writing about my feelings, prepare my goals, make lists, organize my tasks, create plans, or just simply write what’s in my head. Here are no right or wrong things, no judgment, simply just notify my thoughts and my feelings. Our brain is a very nice and complicated muscle. Like all other muscles, it can be trained. Your “brain push-ups” are your thoughts. When you write about your thoughts, you train your brain, because it cannot be focused on anything else, only what you are writing. If you think and feel positive during the morning, you most likely have a good and happy day. (After all, I allowed myself to turn on my internet, and check messages, emails, and social media, for a maximum of 5 minutes!)

  1. Yoga (or any kind of exercise- just move your body)

And we arrived at the favorite part of my morning routine. I love yoga. I never thought it will be one of my favorite types of exercise, but it slowly became one. I do 15-30 minutes daily, depending on how much time I have left after writing. Usually, I use YouTube videos, but lately, I found out about the Boho Beautiful Yoga app and I love them. Juliana and Mark are a lovely couple and incredibly nice teachers and they have amazing yoga, pilates, and meditation videos, also they have a podcast, website, and YouTube channel. Also, they have some free programs which are so effective. Lately, I have done the 7 days Blissful Body Bootcamp series which was 15 minutes of yoga a day for 7 days… intense, and killer, but worth every minute.

The most import is that you do something for your body. Move a little bit. Do push-ups, lift weights, go for a run or a walk, dance in front of the mirror… doesn’t matter, just make sure you move a bit and check how you will feel. Movement creates endorphins as well as dopamine in your body, which are the “happiness hormones”. I think you get it now why it is important. 😉

  1. Learn while you get ready

Usually, after I finished my daily yoga, I start to prepare myself for the day: get dressed, brush my teeth, make my hair, etc. As I am a proper woman, it takes so many times. (Okay, not that many… average…30 minutes…or maybe sometimes more…whatever🙄) So I have time to train my mind. That means I listen to podcasts (yes, it is a kind of brand-new morning routine as you know from my previous podcast). I love it. I love the fact to use my time to learn something new and I do not waste a minute of my morning. So effective and energizing, at least that it causes me.

So, folks, that’s how I relax and get ready for my day. It became important to me to take care of my soul, my mind, and my body. Not just because everyone is getting older (of course except me), but it feels so good and this routine gives me a nice and calm vibe to start the day. Of course, I do have bad days, lazy days, or even moods, but still, my mornings are always calm and balanced. I do not say that this is the best recipe for everyone. We are all different…some of you are owls and like to stay up until late, so you will not wake up at 5.30 am to do all of this. Or even someone who has more energy during the afternoon (it could be a good afternoon routine too) will prefer to do these things then. Also, all of these things can be done at different times of the day or actually more often each day. The most important that we all need to take care of our mind, body, and soul to feel better and be better people. 😉

I hope you have a relaxed and nice November and if you are as much a Christmas freak as I am… well…the holiday season officially started!!!!! 😁

XOXO

Krisz😘

P.S.: For more fun, tips, relax, please follow Spitfire on Instagram and Facebook. 

Categories
This is how we do it!

Podcast relax

Hello guys,

I hope you are doing well. I cannot believe it’s already November. One of my favorite months, because nature has amazing colors, everything is just slowing down and starting the preparation for the winter…or in my case for Christmas. 

I have started this part of the blog where I will share my recommendations, favorites, and things which helped me during the years of my positive journey. And this post will be one of my many recommendations. Also, I recently wrote about the importance of slowing down, so I bought a tip for you on how to educate while you are just stepping back a bit from your crazy busy life. November will be all about slowing down and relaxing. I plan to bring some tips about how to be more relaxed. It will be a very exciting month, I promise.

So what I have realized is literally 24 hours is not enough for me (okay “fun fact” that I am capable of sleeping like, and as much as a baby, but I need at least 8 hours of sleep to be able to function) to do everything I wish and also like to do. I like to do so many different things, such as Zumba, dance, meditation, yoga, eat ( one of my favorites), sleep, sometimes cook or bake, read, learn, etc. So I had no idea how I fit into my busy schedule of self-development. My best friend said that he loves listening to podcasts and my first reaction was: “Dude, I have no time and even I don’t like to listen to one subject, I love listening to music, but not people talking.” Guess what he introduced me to Joe Rogan’s podcasts (okay, I am a huge fan of Scott Eastwood, so the interview with him) and my whole world changed. Let’s make it something clear, I do not like to listen to thematic podcasts because I am never really sure which subject is interesting to me, but I love to listen to totally different subjects. However, positivity, mindset, self-growth, and well-being will always interest me. Since that interview, I became a huge fan of podcasts because finally, I have “time to learn” most easily and quickly. I love learning new stuff, but the fact that my mind is just as hyperactive as my entire self… Well, the classroom learning is just simply freaking me out. Staying over the books, and memories for hours, and the next day after the exam I will not remember for a word…yes, learning wasn’t my best hobby. Don’t get me wrong, I keep studying new things because I think self-development is one of the most important things in life because it challenges you, but not in a classical way…at least not for me.

Podcasts are the best classrooms. I can do the dishes, cleaning, walking and I can learn from the world’s leaders. You can be an expert about anything and you do not even have to pay a huge amount of money to learn from your idols, role models, or even from scientists. You can learn about anything…history, music, sports, social media, business, cars, money, entrepreneurs, well-being, etc. I started to listen to many podcasts depending on my mood. 

My favorites are (of course) Scott Eastwood’s Live Life Better; Oprah Winfrey and the Super Soul Conversations; Tony Robbins and The Tony Robbins Podcast; Joe Rogan and The Joe Rogan Experience; Mel Robbins and The Mel Robbins podcast…and one of my friend’s podcast is What Wild Women Wants with Rachel Rose (if you like spirituality and holistic health this will be your favorite). One of the newest is Archetypes with Megan (yes, Duchess of Sussex), I always liked her as an actress and I do since then. I listen to many more, but not all. 😅

I think this type of education is amazing and makes it easier and quicker to study different areas of the World. What I have learned since I started my “positive journey”, never stops growing. You always need to challenge yourself and be an expert in as many areas of life as you can, because when you feel alive, you can feel confident. Even if you think you know something, just question that knowledge and be open to new opinions, and new views, so you will keep continuing to grow.

I know many of you are just laughing now and saying: “welcome to the 21st century Babe.”, “Podcasts are so obvious and everyone listening to them, where do you come from”. Well, you are right, but as I said so many times in my previous posts, everyone has the “click” or as Oprah says ” aha” moments when the time has come for them to be ready to get the information.🥰

I love you all. Listen to podcasts!!!! 😅

XOXO,

Krisz🥰

P.s: Quotes will be back soon. As I mentioned earlier November will be all about how to slow down.  If you don’t want to miss anything, please follow the Spitfires on Instagram and/or Facebook. 😘

Categories
This is how we do it!

Slow down!

Hello guys,

I hope you are all well and enjoying the beauty of the fall. I know I have not posted for a while here or on my social media, but I had to slow down. 

I am a very energetic, hyperactive and always on the move person. Never stop! Stop? Sit down? Relax? Never really was in my vocabulary. To be honest, during the past years I have gotten better, but I am still addicted to stress. I couldn’t leave without it. Well, now I had no other chance, because life just actually did shut me down.

Two weeks ago I got a really bad cold. People who know me, also know that cold never stopped me from working and especially never forced me to stay in my bed…at least not longer than a day. I have spent five whole days in my bed, having tea, medicine and everything to get better. I literally couldn’t get out of my bed, I physically wasn’t able to do so.

And that made me think about the importance of slowing down, stopping, relaxing and listening to my body. 

I believe that your body and your soul are always telling you what to do and what is the best for you. I worked a lot, never stopped stressing, I had so many activities after work too, the blog, the pictures, the new projects which I have just started…well I got overwhelmed and my body physically stopped me and saved me from myself.

In my opinion a cold or any kind of illness has two parts:

a.) Physical. This is clear, your body is tired and needs to stop to recover.

b.) Emotional. It can be any kind of “negative” (or how I call “emotions that no longer serves you”) emotions.

I believe that we only will be better for good, if we start with the emotions part. We need to find out how we hurt ourselves, not always consciously, sometimes we do not even realize. Sometimes these are “small” things (at least no one even thinks about those that can affect us in a really bad way) such as guilt, sadness, judging, and negative self-talk. 

Have you ever caught yourself you made a mistake and you just said “oh, I am so stupid”…do you see my point? We don’t think it could hurt. Or what about when you see someone on the tube and you start “really, did she/he not have a mirror, what does she/he looks like”?…yes my friends, pure judgment. I could tell you a million other examples, but I think you got it.

We are always so busy in our everyday life…grab the kids from school, cook something for dinner, go to work, do some exercise, even we stressing ourselves when we try to relax…our mind is not relaxing even when we finally dedicated the time to do so…how many of you just sit down to watch a movie and in the meantime you thinking about that you need to go to grocery shopping the next day, make the presentation on time, need to visit the parents, etc. My special favorite, that’s what I do most of the time: schedule X amount of time to read, exercise, even with meditation and during my relaxing “me time”, I can’t relax, because I am constantly checking my clock, just to make sure I will not spend one extra minute on each “task”, because than the whole schedule will be screwed up. Yes… I know, it is so pathetic that I am stressing about my relaxing time. 

What I want to say here is that please listen to yourself. And now I see someone’s eyes are rolling and asking me the magic question: How? Well, that’s easy, just ask yourself frequently “What would make me happy?”. That’s it. And let it go. Don’t force the answer. Maybe today it will be a bunch of flowers or a cake…cool, do it. (Maximum tomorrow you will spend an extra half an hour on the gym🤷🏼) Go for a walk, call a friend, watch a movie, have a glass of wine…whatever makes you feel happy, but ask and listen!!!! Don’t wait until your body shuts you down…trust me it will do it sooner or later.

Fall is about to slow down and prepare for the winter. As nature transforms itself and starts to prepare, slowing down, we should do the same. During the summer we collected a lot of energy from the long days, from the experiences during the holidays, we spent so much time in the sun, we did it to be prepared for the colder months. As the days get shorter, everyday is getting darker, our body must be slowed, must be prepared.

I will try to share with you from my life and my preparation as much as I can, to do it together and slow down together. So follow the blog on Instagram and Facebook to get tips to slow down and ask as many questions as you like. Even a Spitfire allowed to slow down and relax a bit. ❤

I love all of you so much! ♥️

XOXO

Krisz🥰

Categories
Blog

The Queen

The Queen 👑

This is a bit unusual post from me and sorry if someone doesn’t really care about it, but I wish to tell what I see and how I think about the current situation.
As you know, I live in London and I’m sure everyone knows that The Queen is dead. Why do I want to talk about this? How is it affecting me? What does it look like to live in London these days? What do foreign people think about this?
Well, I never was a “huge fan” of the Royal Family, but I never had a problem with them either. They are a huge part of the community, the history and the everyday life of the UK. The whole country built up to this monarchy. Some people are proud of them, some hate them, but one thing is sure, everyone has feelings about the Royals. I heard people say that they just take their money and do nothing…well true and false. The people are paying with their lives, but they are a part of this country’s history. My opinion, if we do not give this money to them, this money will go to someone else’s pocket…at least like this we sponsor history.
And the Queen’s death is history. I’m 33 years old and I have never lived in a World where England doesn’t have a Queen and that Queen wasn’t Elizabeth II. So when I heard the news, I felt sad and shocked. I liked and some ways I adored that woman. She was funny, kind and had an amazing humor. She was a bit like everyone’s grandmother. But she was so powerful, elegant and everyone respected her for her service and her huge heart. I’m sad. Even though I have never met her, she is on our money, buildings, transport, she is in everyone’s life in the UK. An era has ended on Thursday, 8th September 2022.
She has been reigning for 70 years. She has done many things during these years, you can read them everywhere. Her elegance and still being a human made me respect her, not those amazing things. Yes, sure she made mistakes as everyone else. Even if she was The Queen, she was a human being. He Majestic was born in a different world, she had been through so many things and many more changes, but she could stay as a human. She wasn’t just the Queen of the UK. If you ask people around the world, they may not know who their own prime minister is, but everyone knows who Queen Elizabeth II is. Funny story, but I remember when I was a kid (around 5-6), I heard in the news about another royal family. I was shocked and totally confused… I said to my Mom “How is it possible that there is another Queen in the World? I thought The Queen is (sorry, I was a kid) that old lady called Elizabeth?!”. So yes, she wasn’t just the UK’s Queen.
How is London now? Quiet. You can feel the sorrow in the city. People are living their lives, they are in pubs, but those pubs are much quieter than usual. The streets are less busy. You can feel the sadness and the shock everywhere. I have never seen this quiet weekend since I moved here.
As I said, an era ended on Thursday. I hope she will rest in peace.

Thank you for listening guys.

XOXO,

Krisz ♥️

Categories
Egyéb kategória This is how we do it!

Hungary vs Italy: The wedding competition – part 2😉

Hello Everyone and welcome back!

I know, I know, I am always late with the posts and I am so sorry, but I am a very busy woman (I must live my life, so I can deliver new stories, once I put my ass down and finally write them). But now I am back and as I promised, I will let you know how it was at the Italian wedding.

Before I start, I would like to dedicate this post to the couple, my dear friends and say Thank you that I can be there and you shared your happiness with me, but most importantly Thank you for being such amazing friends and part of my family. I love you to the Moon and back guys!❤

So let’s get the party started!

In Italy they will skip the coming and going part between the 2 houses, but the groom’s family and friends are gathered in his house and the bride’s side of the guest in her family house.

By the way, in Italy the groom cannot see the bride until the church doors open… trust me, I am one of the “cold hearted woman” and I do not get cry so easily, but when the doors was open and I saw my best friend as real Princess (btw she is always like a Princess and she never believe me)… well though Krisztina started to cry. It was worth everything to see her and her husband’s happiness on that day.

 As I mentioned in my previous post in Italy the couple can do the government and the church wedding in the church, so both are placed in a very nice church in Udine. The guest arrived and everyone was waiting outside until the very last moment (when the bride arrived) in front of the church. Once the bride’s car arrived (and before obviously she came out of it), everyone just went inside the church and had their seat. (My friends created a kind of booklet with the ceremony, so we could follow the ceremony. If you know Italian, but that does not matter.) Previously I told you, I understand a bit of Italian and the ceremony was really nice and the priest was such a cool and funny guy. After the ceremony ended, it was rice, bubbles, flowers, and everything you can imagine. (This is similar in Hungary too.) Everyone had a chance to take pictures with the couple  or of them. 

When the ceremony/ceremonies over the real party has started. As I said in my previous post, both countries’ weddings continue in the same way… “GO TO EAT!”🤣Well in Italy we have been in a really nice castle on the top of a hill… trust me (now you can be jealous, all of you) the view was absolutely breathtaking. I attached some pictures for you guys, but these are nothing compared to being there… If you don’t feel that finally you are alive in that place…well you will never feel it anywhere else. The hills, the nature, the whole milieu…It was such an experience.

Back to the wedding, both countries love the welcome drinks part, but in Hungary we prefer the alcoholic, especially spirits… okay, okay, I am not trying to market better, Pálinka. 😀In Italy they are more sophisticated, so different kinds of wines, lemonade (most amazing I have ever tasted in my life- sorry Mum),  and water with ice, so you can cool down a bit in the 40 degrees. (It took place on the front garden of the castle and trust me the view was absolutely “disgusting”) The couple arrived with in a very nice old timer car and that’s another different point, because they just stopped and let everyone take pictures of them or with them, while in Hungary you do it only after the wedding ceremony.

And finally we are on the food part! I know, I started to get hungry too. But in the traditional Hungarian wedding everyone sits around the tables and starts the dinner, in Italy first you have a huge buffett…I don’t even try to write you down all the food was served there and I don’t think that everyone ever described a word how delicious it was!!!!! (This kind of “dinner” started to take place in Hungarian weddings too, but as I said this kind of thing really depends on  the couple.) But seriously guys… you have no idea how much food is there!!!!! (Funniest thing that my best friend- THE WIFE- asked me how the food was and was it enough?????? Are you kidding me??? Have you seriously asked that question????😮🙄🤣) You know, what… I think the pictures will say everything… and that was only the buffet. The couple was the first to eat and when they had picked up their preferences, the rest of us started to have “something”.

After everyone finished with the buffet the couple took pictures with everyone on the top of the hill, behind a very nice view. They made sure they have pictures with all the family and friends and also some just the two of them.

When you think you are full with all the best Italian stuff and had a walk around the place, made your picture with the couple, discovered the gardens, with flower swings, gates, (yes, you read it correctly, a Flower Swing!) swimming pool, woods and everything else you can not even imagine, someone just says that the dinner is about to start…WTF???? Really?? I have just eaten a whole pig with every kind of cheese, vegetable, sausages, the most amazing bread I have ever tasted and I was much more rolled down the hill than walking, now we just “start the dinner”!!! Don’t laugh guys, it was so serious. 😅Not just a bit of food… nooooo… 5 course menu…5!!!

Well, I have attached the picture of the menu, so you can have a look at it…don’t even bother myself to write it down…no.

During the dinner, between the courses the couple walked around, played the shoe game, which I think I have mentioned in the Hungarian wedding, because that is similar and you were allowed to take pictures of yourself which ended up in a photo album as a memory for the couple. 

At this point I would like to say how lovely, nice, kind and friendly the Italian nation is. My friends created an “English table”, so me and my best friend sat at the table where everyone spoke English too and they were lovely. I have not felt for a moment that I have not belonged there. Even though it was clear that some of them have known each other for a long time, they welcomed us as they have known us for so long. It was another amazing experience to meet with those lovely people.

Once we “survived” (no, not finished, survived) the dinner, guess what was waiting for us outside in the garden????? I know you can get this.😅 YES, more food!!!!!!!!🤣 Fruits, cakes, every kind of sweets and…and…a CHOCOLATE FONDUE… I think that was the point where I just put my hands up and said: “I will die by eating, but at least in the most beautiful place I have ever been!” By the way, that was the “rest time” before the party started and 3 people brought out the Wedding Cake!!!!!🤣 I love Italian people, I do! They know how to enjoy life (or at least how to eat without dying) and I think the rest of the World should learn from them this mentality!

It was a lovely cake cutting ceremony with fireworks and Ed Sheran’s Perfect song… yes, I cried there too…and what?!😅 Pictures say it better than me, how lovely it was.

After that started the dance. Of course the couple opened it and after their dance, everyone started to enjoy the night. The bar was open, the people were happy and all went absolutely perfect. Italian weddings do not continue until the morning and I was really happy about it, because it was a long day before (that’s another story), but in the meantime I wish I could be there forever…in that place, with those people and just feel the happiness that was there… to see and feel the pure love, gratitude, joy and all the positive energy in the World. 

Before we left my friends surprised us with the “Thank you gift”, which was a bottle of the local wine which was made for that castle specifically and a bit of local sweets, but the surprise wasn’t those things… I knew from the beginning that they are lovely people and I will do anything to keep them as friends forever…but they have even thought about our families and sent them gifts too.

Well it was one of the most amazing weddings I have ever been to and not only because of the fact that it was in one of the most beautiful places, not because it was in Italy, which is one of my favorite places on Earth…nooo… because I saw my friend’s happiness. I love you guys so much and I wish you all the best. I wish all your dreams will come true and be as happy as you have been on that day for the rest of your life.💞

XOXO,

Krisz💞

Categories
Egyéb kategória This is how we do it!

Hungary vs Italy: The wedding competition – part 1😉

Traditional Hungarian wedding

Hello,hello

As I mentioned a long time ago, I want to make a site where I will see the differences between nations, cultures, traditions, foods and so many other things based on my discovery. I am so excited about these “projects”, because I really love to talk to people. As you know I live in London, which is a beautiful cultural mass, so I am in the best place to do it.☺️ I hope you will enjoy reading these, just as much as I enjoyed writing them.

I am so lucky that one of my best friends is Italian and her (now) husband too. So when they invited me to attend their wedding, I felt so excited and so honored. Especially because they are one of the best couples I have ever met. Their love story and how they live their life is so inspiring.
So what’s the difference between an Italian and a Hungarian wedding? Well I have no idea where I start the list.😅 (Here I want to make a note that I love weddings and doesn’t matter where they take place, I just generally love them, so both nation’s weddings are incredibly and of course these are just general differences,due to a wedding is always based on the couple’s style.)
Let’s start with my nation’s, The “Traditional ” Hungarian wedding. The wedding starts with the groom going to the bridge’s house with all the invited people and asking the bride from her father. Live band escorts him to the house and the bride’s family offers small cakes or pastries with some drinks (of course alcohol) to the people who came to the house to see the “ceremony”. Some couples hire a ceremony master, some use the maid of honors, it really depends on the couple. (This is an old tradition, nowadays this part often will be skipped.) After that the whole crew must go to the groom’s house and ask the groom from his mother. (Again cakes, drinks, music, fun and some couples skip this part too.)
Once they have both been asked out from their parents, everyone goes to the church or the local council, it is absolutely up to the couple which will be the first place or nowdays the church wedding is not really a part of the weddings, due to not that much place in the World accepting the marriage which was only blessed by the church and not by the government. But if the couple decides to go to have both, they usually go to the church first. And that part is similiral in Italy, only they can do both the government and the church wedding in the church. Okay at this point I would like to make a note that I do not speak Italian, but I can understand a lot, so based on my “piccolo” Italian, the ceremony is quite the same, unless in Italy some guests say speeches about the couple, while in Hungary we are not allowed to do that. Shoulders must be covered in both countries in the church and that’s okay. (Another quick note that it was a christian catholic wedding- and I am christian too.)

After the ceremony in Hungary there is some rice, flowers, bubbles and whatever you want. Also there is the part where the guest is allowed to make “official” pictures with the couple, due to after the ceremony the couple usually goes to their chosen “photography place” where the official wedding pictures will be made. These pictures will be sent to the guests who were there, family members, to take as memories and the couple usually ask for an album for themselves as well.
While the couple is busy being photographed…Both countries’ weddings continue in the same way… “GO TO EAT!”🤣And trust me if I say both nation are really obsessed with the food part. The entire World knows that Italians are so into food and fashion… well Hungarian too. So you end up at the party place. It can be anywhere… restaurants, bars, cafes, fields, tents, castles, etc… anywhere where the couple like to have their wedding. This really depends on the couple, the number of attendees, the food, the type of the party or the theme of the wedding.
Once you arrive at the party place the first thing is…yes, you are right, drinks. 😅 It could be spirit, champagne, wine,etc. The most important thing is that you have to have your welcome drink.
The Continuation of the day is a bit different in each wedding, because in places you just sit down and be ready for the dinner or some couple choose to do their first dance before the meal is served or starts with some wedding games. The tradition is that the people have some cakes, talk a bit, drink a bit and once the couple arrives the dinner starts. Usually there is a siting plan, due to next to your name will be the wedding favours gift. The traditional Hungarian wedding menu includes chicken soup, which is always the start served with the vegetable and the chicken itself. Then comes the fried,baked and cooked meats/ vegetables (mostly pork, chicken and/or beef; fried mushrooms, cheese, cauliflower, etc.) with mashed potatoes, chips, rice, fresh salads, sauces, pickled onions and girkin, etc. The end comes the cakes … lots of different kinds of cakes. The menu is massive, but it is necessary otherwise you cannot drink… which is a very important part of the wedding. During the dinner, between two courses we do wedding games (it is kind of similar in Italy and the games too). The groom should take the bride’s garter with his teeth…or the quiz game where they have each other’s shoes and have to pull up the right shoe to answer the questions…the story telling game, where they involve the guests too. The ceremony master starts to tell a fairytale and each person has their own character. When you hear your character in the story you have to stand up…if you miss it or you stand up at the wrong time …well, you must drink.
After the dinner the couple danced their first dance (same in Italy) and the party officially started. The traditional music is the traditional Hungarian gypsy music from a band, but it can be a DJ too who plays the popular ’80 and ’90 songs.

A bit later the couple cut the wedding cake and the party continued with dance and drink, drink and dance until midnight… midnight they start to serve the traditional Hungarian stuffed cabbage, which is actually meatballs with cabbage…one of my favourite part of the weddings.😅 And in the meantime the couple goes and change their dresses from white to red, the symbol of that the bride is now officially a wife and a groom became a husband. Once this happens it will start the New wife dance… So traditionally the wife has to dance with all the male guests and the new husband dances with the female guest. Before the guests start their own dance with the couple they have to “pay” for this dance (the couple’s parents have a huge pot and the guests put their wedding gift- usually an envelope with money- into the pot). When everyone finished with them and paid for their dance it started another funny game. The New wife has a broom and the new husband has a dustpan. The guest throws the coins into the floor and they have to collect it all in a bucket, but the guest always continues to throw the bucket to the floor. Once all the coins are in it, the party counts until dawn. Usually the Hungarian weddings finish somewhere between 4am and 6am.
Every Hungarian has a little bit of Spitfire in them, especially if it is about a wedding 😅
Huh, I didn’t realize until I finished with how long this post is, so I will let you know about the Italian wedding in my next post which will be published very soon, I promise, so please check my Instagram, Facebook or just like the blog below the post so you will not miss anything.😘

Love all of you and I hope, I will have you all here tomorrow to see the Italians.😘

XOXO,

Krisz

Categories
Egyéb kategória Story of My Life

The Preparation

Hello Everyone!

As I promised, I am back to tell you why a 23 years old girl decided to leave all her life, family, friends and everything she has known and went to London. I do apologize that it took way too long to write this, but I was in Hungary and Italy and I will let you know about that time too.

In my last post I told you, I had a nice life and I was really happy, but I felt that I needed more. I cannot really explain the feeling, but I felt that I must go. It was one of the strongest instincts I have ever got in my life. I was always a “dreamer” and I still am. Always wanted to see the World, discover all the miracles and meet new people. (Later on I will bring you some stories about other people’s lives too.)But now, let me tell you how for the first time in my life (at least this is the first I remember) I was attracted to things and joined the “law of attraction”…and how it all actually started.

It was in the middle of November and I will remember until I die, that the sun was shining and my boss asked me into his office. I have never imagined that this meeting will change my whole life. 😊 (Just a bit of explanation to understand better, but in 2013, in Hungary the whole government system was changed and they started the preparation in 2012 last quarter.) He told me that I will have to start in January a training course, the office will pay for it, but it means I cannot leave the office for XY years (do apologize guys, but I have no idea how much was it😅) or if I want to leave earlier, I have to pay back the training’s cost… and that was the moment what hit me so hard. I told him that okay, and I will do it, but I felt I would collapse.

I went outside to the fresh air and started to think. I was 23 years old and I never had money to travel, see the World…not even to move together with my (ex)boyfriend. My parents always gave us everything they could (and even more), but they weren’t allowed to give those things and I never wanted them to support my “hobbies” or my life, because they have done it for so long. They raised me and my brother wonderfully. 

The salary was nothing actually… So I had to do something else (and that’s what I really felt). I will die in the same village where I was born, I will live with my parents until I will get a mortgage which I will never be able to pay back and the farest place I have ever been will be Budapest.

So I called my (ex) boyfriend and told him that I will move to London in January.😅 I explained to him everything and he said okay. (Why London? Because God bless my German teachers during the 12 years they tried to teach me Dutch, but I still cannot say a word.😅 I have never liked that language and I don’t really know why. So I thought I speak English- well very quickly I had to realize that I don’t- and another reason was that jobs are in London, so that’s why.) I went back to the office and told my Boss that I will give my notice on the last day of November and I will move to London. He was so understandable and supportive about this.

But still we had no savings, no money and both of us had debts. And here comes the law of attraction… I had no idea how I would manage financially to come to London, but I knew I would do it, no matter what. I had only one high school classmate here and he helped us to do the CVs, but we had no idea where we would sleep or what we would do there. We wanted to get a job from Hungary to London, but the World doesn’t work like this. You physically have to go to interviews and no one gives you a job just because you look cute (even if I do). So we had no idea about anything, but we were sure we were coming on the 9th January 2013. (Why that day? Well, we closed our eyes and pointed to a date on the calendar, checked the tickets, the prices were okay, so we kept the date) 

Miracles just started to happen about the money. We got bonuses, unpaid projects had been paid, family helped as much as they could…so in the end we just had a bit of money which was okay until we found our first job. (That’s another story!) Everyone was so supportive, helpful and of course worried about us. (We were worried too, but of course I can only admit this now. 🤣) 

2 weeks before our flight we went to Budapest to an agency, which promised some job in England (no, not in London, somewhere up North in a  village), so we went there, but we had to realize that he wants so much money and no one would wait us in the airport, we supposed to buy new tickets to another airport, etc. So we left the office, stand in the middle of Budapest (it was my 3rd time in the capital) and we had no idea where we would sleep or what we would do after we arrived in London. Now it is so funny how God (Universe, Life, etc) helped us. My friend just checked his phone, because we heard an interview a couple of days before with the most popular Hungarian Lettings Agencies owner, and their HUngarian office was only a couple of minutes walk from us in Budapest, so we went there.They were very nice and we were about to rent a room and in the contract they have guaranteed a driver who will pick up us in the airport. 

That’s how and why in London. Never give up and just have faith. So many years later I have realized that we actually just attracted everything for us. Only with our faith and positive attitude. We do not always need to know everything or control the things around us. Sometimes it is enough if you just truly know what is the end, what you really want and let the life flows… and of course need a bit of sparkle from your (Spit)fire.😘

With lots of Love:

Krisz (Spitfire)

P.S.: In the last 2 weeks I was lucky enough to collect lots of so many stories of interesting people’s life and some experiences (including a lovely Italian wedding), which I will share with you. (I try to write more often, I promise, I will try!🤣) Very soon the daily quotes will be back too, so follow @spiritofspitfire on Instagram, Facebook or Like the blog, so you will not miss anything.

Categories
Egyéb kategória Story of My Life

The Beginning

Hello Guys,

I am Kris (Krisztina and most of you know me) and I am from Hungary. Before I start to tell you about London, I think it is important to tell you about where I come from.
Once upon a time… yes, a princess was born in South Hungary, in a really small town. (I know, absolutely typical and nothing really interesting 🤷‍♀️)On the day when I was born my parents bought a plot in a small village, where they started to build our family home. When I was 2,5 finally the house was ready to move in and my very first memory is that my parents let me choose my room.
I had an amazing childhood and I am so grateful for everything I have got from my family. My parents were never rich people, but they gave me and my brother everything they could and even sometimes more. Yes, I have a “little” brother who is 4.5 yeras younger than me and I am so happy that I have a sibling (at least , now I am happy about him.😉). Of course, we have had difficulties when we were kids, but this is absolutely normal. Who doesn’t have fights with her/his siblings, seriously?
I was lucky enough to know all my grandparents and we had really strong connections with all of them. Funny to see how my pride (and many other qualities) came from my dad’s mother and my way too big mouth (and many others) came from my mom’s mother.I am a really good mix of them.
My village is small, around 1000 people live in it, but it was a wonderful place to grow up. I used to go to the Kindergarten and Primary school too in this village. I had great teachers and so many friends. I am lucky to have a lot of good memories from my childhood. My parents and my family loved me, I have got lots of love from friends, teachers, people and still I have when I am going home, from time to time.
Obviously ,later on I went to High School, which was in a small town, not so far from my village and those were the best years of my life. The college and all the people there shaped me and helped me to become a young adult. Lovely atmosphere in a beautiful place, next to one of the biggest rivers in Hungary, so many parties, friends, first loves, first break ups (well, a Princess need a real Prince and cannot kiss all the frogs), smiles, and lovely teachers who always tried to guide us, but also leave us to find our own ways. I will always be grateful for those years and those people.
Since I remember, I was always hyperactive and I had that feeling that I have to do something, not just be and live the life like others. I always wanted to create, help, be there for others.
So after High School I have got one of the biggest opportunities in my life, because my village’s notary gave me the chance to become a part of that amazing team. I was only 19 years old when I started there and I was almost 23 when I left. He and the team teach me a lot and I have got a second family. I also can thank him for being one of my best friends too. Lots of nice times, laughs, happiness, also like in every “family” were hard days too, but we took care of each other and I loved to work there. I will always be grateful for those years. From him came one of my favorite quote too (he gave me on the day I left them to go to London):

“The longest journey begins with a single step.”

So why did I leave? Why have I decided to move to London and leave all my life behind? Why does someone just pack and leave?
Well, I think this will be another day’s story, but I promise I will continue. I hope you will be with me. 😉

Love you all. 😘

Kris
P.S.: To my readers from other countries, Budapest is a lovely place and a must to see, but if you have a chance, come a bit south and you can see so many nice places too. (Lake Balaton, Pécs, Szigetvár, Barcs, Kaposvár etc.- these are “my area”, but you can find other lovely places in Hungary, trust me. 😉)

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

Who am I?

Hello Guys,

I know, I know, I didn’t write a word almost a month ago…I promise, as soon as I can, I will kick my own butt. Due to I assigned May to “Confidence”, I wanted to talk about my confidence (or sometimes, when I don’t have), how I lost it and how I built it up so many times…but something came in my mind that I couldn’t let it go and I think first we need to clear the air about this question. Once we know who we are, we can build up our confidence, opposite this will never work. But seriously, is this the right question or is it something else that we are searching for?

I had a lot of conversations about this with my friends and family. It seems that nowadays everyone wants to “find themself”. We are just searching for something that is actually US. 

Who am I? So many times we feel we are lost and have know idea who we are and what we really want in our life. And that’s okay. Noone need to punish themselves about this. This is a normal outcome of growing. We can grow by the changes and never by the routine. During those changes our personality changes a lot (even if we don’t want to or don’t even recognize that.)

In my opinion we are not just one “thing”. If you ask people who they are, mostly they will tell you their jobs. “ I am a doctor”- “I am a banker”-” I am a hairdresser”- “I am…” Really? Are we really our jobs? Or do we “do” something for the living? Do you see the difference?😉

Or when you ask a mother- “I am a mother.” Yes, you are…but you are not just a mother. She is also a daughter, a sister, a wife, a girlfriend, a friend, etc. Or obviously if it is a man, he can be a father, a brother, a friend, also he has a job, so he can be a banker, fisher, etc.

My favorite one is when actually the answer is based on our mood…”I am angry”- “I am mad”- “I am upset”- Seriously? Are you? Is this who you are? Or is this what you feel at the moment? And this is very important and very dangerous guys, because words have power…what you feel,who you say you are today will be the one tomorrow. Don’t get me wrong,when we say and feel “I am happy”-“I am amazing”- “I am excited”… These are all good “to be”s, and we should use these phrases so much more, but be careful with the negative pair of them.

I don’t know how you work guys, but usually “I am” at least 6 different people each day (and that was an easy day). My point is that this is one of the most complicated questions ever. The answer: It depends on the mood, the job, the place where you live, the people around you, the environment, ethnicity, etc. I am stubborn, moody, complicated,hysteria, a fighter,a woman, a sister, a friend. I am also clever, nice,kind, pretty, sexy, bitchy, lost, smooth, even the worst days I can be a dragon (dracharys) and able to burn it down everything around me.😅

Based on the conversations with people around me and on my own “searching myself journey” here is what I found out: the most important question is not “Who I am?” The most important is “Who I want to become?” My mentor and mostly my friend ( drop me a message if you want her contact, because she is a magician and helped me a lot everytime when  I had difficulties in my life) helped me a lot with this question and let me realize this.

I’m sure all of you heard this so many times, but it is so true: “who you think you are today, will be the person tomorrow.” So my conclusion is that we do not need to find ourselves. We are who we are and we are all what we think we are. Most importantly we should be happy, in harmony, accept the worst sides of us, because those are us too and find who we want to be. Once you find the answer for this question, you can work to become that person. 

How do you do that? How do you find the person you want to be? Just ask yourself everyday, every time until you find the answer. (Or at least that’s how I do.) And trust me, during your journey, your life this answer will always change and that’s fine too.

No matter what you should know that you are perfect (even when you are a dragon). 😉 You deserve to be loved and if someone says otherwise, just say: Dracharys! 😉

I love you all♥️

XOXO,

Miss Spitfire 😘

P.s.: If you have any questions or just want to see the daily quotes easier, please follow my Instagram or Facebook page. I plan to change the blog look and the quotes,but I will update you guys on time.😘

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

Gratitude and happiness

Hello Lovelies,

Yes, you are right, I am much happier than ever. 😁 (Okay that’s just a joke, because nowadays I am quite happy every day.) As you know, (because I told you in the past posts) I have started to do a “course” with the Transformation Academy (no, I am not promoting them or it is not a commercial, I just really love their courses) which is called the 21 Day Happiness Challenge. It is amazing. 😊 I cannot tell you everything, but I have done a bit of a summary for you. The course was made to break 3 parts. 

The first part is called “Happiness routine”. Each day you will add another activity to your happiness daily routine, so at the end of the week, you will have a 7 points Happiness routine list which you can practice everyday.

The Routine:

  1. Gratitude
  2. Music
  3. Self-Love
  4. Physiology
  5. Happy Anchor
  6. Incantation (affirmation)
  7. Meditation

Well, as I said I am not allowed to talk about them so much, so I will not explain each of them properly, but I am sure that you can figure it out, which activity means what. (I really recommend the challenge with the Academy, because they are super nice and all is fun.)

What I can talk about and I want to talk about is gratitude from my perspective. Why the gratitude? What does it even mean? Why is it so important? How can we practice? Why does it work sometimes and why not the other times? Do I need to be grateful everyday and all day? Is it even possible? 

Let’s start at the beginning as we usually do (then I will talk too much, losing the subject and in the end I will be somewhere else- I know.:) – but I also know that that’s why you love me. 😜). So why the gratitude? We are human beings (yes, even me) and we have feelings, plans (that’s definitely me), dreams and wishes. And that’s okay. What is not okay, that we do not wish for something more and appreciate what we already have or achieved…Noooo…we want things (not even wish) and in the meantime we do not care about what we have. ( I made the same mistake so many times in my life, and paid a huge price for it.) I know and I understand that maybe the job is sh@t, or your boss is a Khmm yes, what you think he/she is… and your boyfriend doesn’t even listen to you, or the neighbor is so loud and annoying, or your parents/teachers want way too much from you, or the house where you live is a disaster…etc. The list is long and we all know that nothing is always perfect, so if you look at your life a bit, I am sure you can find something to complain about. And that’s the point where we all make mistakes.

Wish for more, that’s absolutely perfect. Work for it. But NEVER, ever complain about what you have. I don’t say that because in Africa the children are hungry, so you do not eat. That’s stupid. Or I do not say, if your neighbor is loud, just sit and wait for some miracle. That’s also stupid. What I say, that instead of complaining about what you do not have or have but not how you want it, just sit down sometimes and see what you can like/love about your current situation. Maybe your boyfriend doesn’t listen always, but you are with him, because of some reason (that’s just you know why). Instead of complaining, leave him  if it cannot be solved the problem (yes, if he hits you, or gives you drugs, etc.), or just sit down and think about how someone may want a family and kids, but she/he doesn’t even have a boyfriend/girlfriend. Or you complain about your job, but you are there because you loved once. You get your salary from there. So just send your CV, and in the meantime, find what you loved in it at the first time and when you have a better opportunity, just quit. Simply and less stress.

Until you cannot find good things in your life, you can never be happy. Even on the worst day you can find something…like the sun is shining, you have a home, you have family, friends, you have a job, you can eat, you have clothes to wear, etc. After I wake up every single day I write at least 10 things why I am happy/grateful from the day before. It could be small, it could be big things (or things are big for me), but I do this. I think this is a very nice exercise, because you can “live it again” yesterday, and feel gratitude straight after you wake up. And try to keep it for the rest of the day. I have read in so many books that how you feel the first 20 minutes of your day, will define your day. 

BUT…and here is the trap… it is not enough just to write everyday why are you grateful, you must feel it. Of course if you write something so many times, the feeling will come, but if you don’t feel gratitude the whole listing, journaling, meditating, etc is just a bullsh@t. The feeling is the key.  Also if you write every morning why are you grateful, but the rest of the day you are just complaining about your life…well why are you exactly waiting for the miracle? I know how important it is, because I made those mistakes.

I had a super job, but I wanted to change. I wanted to do something different. Instead I just wished for the new job and was happy, because I already had a job, so I could pay my bills, I could fly home to visit my family, I had nice colleagues, etc. Noooo, what have I done? Yep, I started to complain. I have complained about my colleagues, my commute, about everything, whatever you can imagine. Nothing was good. I got a new job soon and it was worse than the previous.

Do you think I have learnt from this? Of course not. I made the same mistake with my house. I lived in a nice house, which wasn’t perfect, but it was nice, in a nice area and I used to live with nice people. I have done nothing just complaining about it and soon I had to move and guess what happened? Yes, again, I had a house where mice were running around, it was noisy and it always smelled like the KFC on the corner. 

What I want to say, that it is normal if you want something better, but you cannot get better things until you cannot truly feel appreciation for what you already have. It’s not enough to just write the things every day, you must feel it. Also very important that if you make “mistakes”, do not punish yourself. Sit down and try to find what you can learn from it.

I have a person in my life who is really nice to me and he said something yesterday which is so true and I think everyone should consider it: “Whatever condition or place you find yourself in life, always give thanks to God.” (Universe/Life/Mother Earth- however you call it) Just think about it. 😊

So be happy and grateful for your life everyday, even if it seems you are sitting in the middle of the storm, because after the storm will come the rainbow.

XOXO,

Miss Spitfire😘

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

Forgiveness

I know, I promised that I will share with you my Happiness Challenge experiences and I will. Actually Forgiveness is a part of the challenge, a bit later, but I thought this is one of the most important. 

Why? Well, you can do a Happiness Routine and all the practices and they will help, but if you do have negative feelings for someone (or even worse for yourself), how can you be happy and positive? You see? You can’t. Or at least not permanently. (Again that’s just my opinion and based on my experience.) When you have negative feelings about something or someone, you cannot be positive. When you are negative means that you do not have love or any kind of positive energy in your body, so your vibe is not the highest ever. Happiness is a positive and very high level of energy, so you must forgive and let go of the things that you do not desire in your life.

Let’s just clear the air first. What does it mean to forgive? So many people (including me in the past) think about forgiveness like a ritual and they also think you have to go there and say it out loud to the people who make you angry, upset, mean, etc. That’s not really true. You can do that for sure, but forgiveness is much more for your own health and nothing to do with the other person or the situation. There are so many techniques that can help you to forgive( I will give you some ideas), but it doesn’t matter which one you use, if it is not coming from your heart. To forgive someone is just a decision. You choose to let go of the bad/negative/unsatisfied feelings and open the next chapter in your life (with or without the person or situation).

Also forgiveness is not equal to forgetting.Forgive someone does not mean that you have to forget everything and let them behave like nothing happened. Actually the opposite. You should remember, even if it hurts you, because if you do not learn the lesson, it will happen again. I believe that everything and everyone enters our life for a reason. Someone comes to give you positive feelings, someone teaches you something, someone stays “forever”, someone just a “traveler” when finished with their “job” they let you go without them. And it’s good like this. Forgiving is creating your own boundaries. 

“Forgiveness is not for the other person. Forgiveness is a gift for yourself.”

Elizabeth Lombardo

I have learnt another lesson about forgiveness. When you do it, you should check the “mirror”. What does that mean? Well, you forgive something that created a bad feeling in yourself. You are never forgiven for positive/good things. The most important question (and actually this is the “mirror”) is why those things bothered you? Why did you feel bad about what other people have done to you? 

I know it sounds stupid and not make any sense at the first time, but you should check why d you hurting yourself and with what. (Okay, now I hear that everyone says: “she is an idiot”; “why should I hurt myself?”; “This is crazy”; etc.- trust me, I have asked the same questions when I first heard about this theory. Just think about it.) We have thousands of thoughts every hour and day. And trust me you cannot control all of them (nope, even not me, who is a very control freak woman. 🙂 ) You do it unconsciously and that’s okay. That’s not a problem and you do not have to check all your thoughts (you will never be able to do that). I just say, that when you sit down to forgive something, think about the fact that may you created this situation, because may you do not trust enough, not love enough yourself, may you punishing yourself about something (what happened in the past).

When you have to forget someone it means you are disappointed. That means you expected something and it did not happen or not on the way you wanted. You can avoid disappointment if you do not expect anything from anyone and if something good happens then you will be happy, if not…well, it would be good like that. (To be honest, if someone knows how NOT to expect anything, please write me, because that something I still cannot do. 🙂 )

So as I said I have a couple of techniques that I use to forgive.

  1. “Writing and burning”- basically I write all my harms on a paper (or you can do it separately, each harm on each paper). Read them out loud and then burn the paper and feel all your anger just gone. (Do not do it when it’s windy or inside your house (not even in someone else’s house, whose you are angry) and make sure you think about all necessary security measures. – At least a glass of water next to you!!!!)
  2. “Eraser”- also, I just write down everything that I wish to forgive with a pencil and instead of burning the paper, I use the eraser and see all my anger gone.
  3. “Meditation”- That sounds very difficult, but it is simple. Just close my eyes, think about the person, think about the situation and the feeling that I felt. When I have got everything, I just simply imagine that the person is in front of me and I say “I forgive you.”

So I will be back with all the experiences from the 21 days Happiness Challenge. BUT until then, you can follow me on Facebook, Instagram or even here and you can get a bit of Happiness from me via my favorite happiness quotes.

Have a super happy (and forgiving) day Spitfires! 😉

XOXO,

Miss Spitfire 

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

How to move as a Spitfire (or not)- Part 2

As I promised, I am back with the rest of the story.

So we’re about a week from the moving out date. We were really upset,tired, exhausted and definitely lost. We started the whole process from the beginning. Search for flats (but of course now only for two people), call agents, tell again the situation, etc. Finally there were 2 amazing flats, but The Sign came again…

The agency said we are more than welcome to go and view the properties, but “there is a little bit of an issue with our moving date”. 🙄 Seriously??? Again??? 

Let me explain to you the meaning of the “little bit of issue “- of course if you first thought that mean “we were in the deep shit” , you technically right and dirty minded – it means that they do not like to be on the rush, so what can be done in 2 days, they will do in 3 weeks.

Yes, you are right, another WTF?!?! 

So we visited the 2 properties and we had 2 days left… So much fun! 

Short version: rent a storage room in Southend where we can put our furniture, rent a room on Airbnb, so we can sleep somewhere and pray!!! Pray a lot! 

We did packed our stuff on the 24th to a (rented) van, take them to Southend,but of course not everything could fit in the van (trust me I have selected which are the most important stuff I have…the rest…well RIP), so for a week our Fiat Punto was full of stuff too. It was a huge mess…we were a huge mess.

Do you know for sure when you reach the bottom? Because you start to think clearly and recognize the small signs that maybe can help to sort out your life. On the way back to London we did recognize that maybe we do not have anything to do in Southend. What if we just stay in London and see what life will bring to us? We have decided that we will try with shared houses , because we were sure that we cannot afford a 2 bedroom flat in London. Just set on a bed in an airbnb room, without a home address (technically we became homeless) and waited for destiny. Totally exhausted and hopeless. 

Life is a funny thing guys, because when you let go of something that was actually meant to you, you will get it just as easily as taking a breath. On the flatshare website we found a 2 bedroom flat and you never guess what happened. From the 6-8 application, that 2 bedroom flat was the only place where they did call us and we went to view it. (that was on Wednesday, we had to move out somewhere until Friday, otherwise we will seriously sleep on the street.)

On Thursday at 4pm we signed our 12 months contract for the 2 bedroom flat in London. The other funny fact about this flat is that it is actually in Crouch End, the place what we always loved and always wanted to move there, but the house costs are there way to high for us, and yet, we have got a 2 bed flat for less than what we did paid in our previous house. 🙂 We both cried…after 3 weeks of nightmare and hopeless fight to move to Southend, we did get a flat in one of the most amazing areas of London, just as easily as taking a breath. 🙂 What is this if it is not a miracle???? Maybe I am a dreamer and I am way too optimistic, but this was one of the biggest miracles in my Life. (Slowly I will tell you the others, I promise.) In that week, when we did not have a home, we faced a lot of other small miracles too. I did sell some of my clothes on Vinted, so many random people just smiled to us, we found an amazing printing shop in Palmers Green (Kodak, go there guys because they are so quick and lovely), have back some money from the storage place and last, but not least if you planned to visit London and you do not know where to sleep, book on airbnb one of our host’s amazing rooms. The house is in Palmers Green. It is a lovely area, she is a nice host, helped a lot, smiled a lot and the rooms are huge, clean and tidy. Also she taught me that never plan in your life, because Life will sort you out just the way it is the best for you. You can have dreams, goals and do for them, but not plan. Just let your life happen. 🙂 Thank you, I will be grateful for her help until I live. 🙂 (I can send the link if you wish, guys.)

Also I have another person who’s I have to mention and I think he is one of the best property agents ever. He helped us a lot during the time we have lived in Pelham Road. He was always helpful, nice, kind and one of the nicest people I have ever known. He did everything he could to help us. Even 2 hours after we moved out of the house, we did get back our deposit, which is super quick. I will be grateful for his help as well forever. (If you need a house in North London, ask me for his details and I am sure he will help you too.) 

( I did not forget to mention about my family and friends. They were always next to me and my best friend. They worried about us, cheered for us and they are the best ever. I am grateful for them every single day and I will until I die. ;)- They are the best. Mom, Dad, my brother and his wife, Nicole and Pasquale (I can never be enough grateful for you guys and what have you done to us), and all of them at home, in Hungary. ) Of course Adam has the biggest thanks, due to he is the best friend who did everything with me and whom I still live with. Thank you for being my best friend for 17 years now. 🙂

Of course Friday we went back to Southend and packed our stuff from the storage, packed in Crouch End.We have got another amazing property agent. He is lovely, quick (he did all the paperwork during an afternoon, what on Southend would take 2-3 weeks) and so helpful (you know, ask for his details) We got used to our new home and we finally found peace.

Do I hate my “friend” why she left us? No. She is a nice person and if she thinks earlier, maybe I cannot go home and have the best Christmas Ever in my life, or my Mom could not come and have an amazing time with just the 2 of us here. May we be in Southend, pay less rent, but also we have less salary. May I not learn what I did learn during this time.

What have I learnt? Well so many things. As I mentioned I have learnt to trust people and Life again. I realized that maybe I wanted to go to Southend, but I have nothing to do there. Maybe a month sucks worth it, just to have a nice Christmas and a relaxing week with Mom. I have learnt that we can wish for better things, but we must appreciate what we already have, because nothing is forever and everything is changing…always. No matter what, life never stays the same forever. I have learnt not to take anything or anyone granted. And finally I have learnt to listen to my instinct and trust only the trustful people around me and realized who I can really count on and who’s not. People are just coming and going in your life.

I do understand no what my friend and master Anita always told me about the mirrors. 🙂 Once you criticize someone, stop for a minute and look at yourself in the mirror and find out why those things are frustrating you in the other people, so you will realize that those are the things that you do as well absolutely subconsciously. 

And I finish this story with Anita’s other lesson: “Nobody is your enemy and nobody is your friend. Everyone is in your life to teach you.”

I hope you did enjoy this story and I can help not move like Miss Spitfire! 😉 (I make mistakes so many times. 🙂 )

Next time I will bring you some positive “lessons” about happiness. 😉 

Oh and don’t forget to follow me here, Facebook and/or Instagram for the daily positive quotes. 🙂

XOXO,

Miss Spitfire

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

How to move as a Spitfire (or not)- Part 1

I am sorry I have not written for a long time now, but trust me,when you read the story of my last 2 months, you will understand everything. Usually, I write you some positive and energy boosting stories, and I promise I will,but first, I just want to share with you my last 1,5- 2 months.

May I mention that I live in London with 2 of my friends… Well, I reduced the amount to only one. Start at the beginning: How did it happen?

As I said we live in London, but last Fall we felt that we had enough of London (now I know it wasn’t about London, it was only a part of it), so we decided to move to Southend-on-Sea. It is a lovely city next to the sea. Quite, clean and only 40 minutes by train from London. The property prices were much lower than in London and we had work opportunities there too. We could save some money from the rent and utility bills. All looked amazing and perfect. So, why not?

We set down and discussed this. My “friend” asked for a bit of time to think about it, due to her jobs in London and she didn’t really want to leave London. She has got 2-2,5 weeks to think about it. She did write “pro/contra lists’ ‘. That’s fair enough, due to not everyone just having enough, pack and move to a different city or even country (yes, it was me). She did put everything on a scale and in the end she decided to come with us. YEEEEPPP!!! ( I say again, it was in November, after at least 2 weeks of thinking.) So we did give our notice for the previous house and we had the moving date: 24th February 2022.

Days, weeks and months past. My Mom came to London, had an amazing Christmas and New Year’s Eve (you know all about). We came back to London after our holiday and we were really excited about the move. 

Here I have to mention a bit about signs. As I said , I am a true believer and I really try to live as positively as I can, and like that I absolutely believe in signs. You can call as you wish God/Universe/Life/Etc., but I am sure we always receive signs which guide us in the right direction. If we are clever enough to listen to them we would have less pain in our life. I also told you that I am very stubborn…so like this, I always learn the hard way. Time has come to start searching for our new home. And we did.

First sign was actually that the government made a decision: if more than 2 people wish to rent a whole house, then the landlord has to have a license called HMO license. This license came with a lot of obligations from the landlord (for example the house has to have at least 2 bathrooms, x size of a kitchen, x amount of rooms, etc.). So of course not that many landlords wish to have this complication in their life, so we had our first problem: we couldn’t find a landlord who wants to have us. Sucks…yes…but the story is far away from the end. You know me guys, I am not the kind of girl who just gives up after the first try. No. We have tried to find a solution which can be good for our future landlord and for us too. And we did. If these 3 people are related then the landlord does not have to pay the HMO. (Related means: marriage, family, kids, siblings, cuisines and of course you are able to proof it- bills on all of your names, previous tenancy agreements, etc.). Guess what? We became cuisines. 🙂 Problem solved. We were happy and even found a house. 

Second sign: We were about to go to Southend, see the house and make an offer. Technically just to go and sign the papers. (It was a week before we had to move out.) Half an hour before we were about to depart from our house, my “friend” said that it cost way too much to travel every single day to London (which she just checked the night before- £300), so she cannot come with us. My best friend and I must move out together without her. WTF????? (And now I mean What The F@ck???????????) She asked for time to think, she said she has done research and lists… and yet, she said 30 minutes before we had to depart to move, that she cannot afford the train tickets… Seriously???? I think even Buddha could be f@cking upset about this. So we stood there a bit more than one week from the moving out date, no house,no options and had to start everything from the beginning.

What could we do? How do we sort it out? What was the solution? How we became technically homeless for a week? How does the story end? What have I learnt from all these? And most importantly how does a Spitfire make a magic of all of these situations? You will know if you will follow me and read the next part of the story. 😉

Trust me this is just the beginning. 🙂

XOXO,

Miss Spitfire

Categories
Blog

Mindfulness

Hello guys,

I hope everything is going well with you. I do apologise because of the “blog-break”, but as you saw on the website, I’m a bit busy nowadays and I love that. ❤ I try to do many nice things, such as offering a free 5-question workbook. The next one is coming soon, which will help you on your self-discovery journey. 

But I’m here now to talk about an important topic, which is our health. I know this one is all over the place, and everyone is living a healthy lifestyle, and mental health is a huge topic nowadays, so the question is relevant: “What new can you tell me?” I’m not sure I can, but I believe the importance of repeating things that are valuable and can be beneficial for others. 

Since the WHO describes it very well, we all know that health is not just not being sick, but it’s feeling good in our body, mind and soul. We all know the components of a healthy life, such as a good night’s sleep, reducing stress, a balanced diet, and the list goes on. I promise I have no intention to speak about food or sleep. Also, I’ll avoid the “no drugs, alcohol or smoke” part. 

What I want to talk about is what I do every day as a life coach, which I see firsthand. This blog is positive, so today’s topic is mental health. And mindfulness. I truly believe that if someone follows a healthy diet, exercises every day, has at least 8 hours of sleep and doesn’t have any bad habits, they still can have serious health issues because of stress. Since the internet and social media are part of our everyday life, the World has accelerated, and the stress factors have increased significantly. Although companies are investing substantial amounts of money in various work-life balance activities, the burnout rates are on the rise. Why? Well, I used to work in the corporate area, and until the multimillion-dollar companies deal with their employees as robots and not humans, a weekly massage or yoga will never help. Think about it. Your company offers fresh fruits for breakfast. You took it, then you went for a company-paid 30-minute massage. When you finish with that, you sit down next to your computer, and you have 30 unread messages regarding what is wrong in the company, and everyone wants you to fix it. How would you feel? Or when you have to take your laptop with you during your holiday, just to make sure that you are reachable, and if you are, trust me, they will reach out. If they don’t, after a week of holiday, your inbox will be full, and I guarantee that when you finish with all those emails, you will feel even more tired than you left for those holidays not to mention the maternity period, especially in the UK, where, as a mother, you have to return to work after 6-8 months. However, the daycares for the kids are free after the age of 2, and the grandparents don’t live nearby or even in the same country. As a private English teacher, I work with kids and see overwhelmed and burnt-out kids every day. Be calm, be happy, be a kid, but they are in the schools until 3 pm, and after that starts the sports practices, the dance lessons, the private lessons (Maths, English, German, Biology, name it and they do it), plus the homework and we surprised when the kids are burnt-out at age 12. Not to mention the graduation periods…Jeez… they’re only 18 years old and they have so much pressure on their shoulders.

Work-life balance is just an illusion in the world. Unless you create one for yourself. I’ve been there, done that. Trust me, hard and sucks, but it’s possible. How do we start to do that?

  1. Time management is essential. The problem is that in our early years in school, we learn that everything has the same importance, which isn’t true. I don’t care if you are a student or an employee, you have to manage your time. And to do that, you must know your timeline. It means that I need 1 hour in the morning to get ready. Doesn’t matter how hard I try, I cannot be 100% during the day without my 1-hour morning prep. How long do you need? Don’t try to put 2 hours’ work in a one-hour timeframe and then be stressed out because you are not done yet.
  1. Prioritise. Multitasking is a very nice and fancy world in our lives, and that’s why we are stressed. That’s what’s expected from us. But the human brain was never wired to do a million things at once, and especially not perfectly. This is the biggest BS in the modern world. Not all the subjects are equally important at school. Come on, don’t tell me that art classes have the same importance in your college application as Maths or the languages? Unless, of course, you want to be an artist, but then Maths doesn’t matter that much. Same in your workplace. Trust me, not all 100 emails have the same priority. John’s “thank you email” will not bring 1 million for the company, but if you don’t answer the biggest client’s email, it can cost that much. So forget the multitasking and prioritise regarding the importance of the company, your life, your mood on that day, your lifestyle or the period you are in it. I used to work in a bar, and my mentor told me that, and since then, I live my life like this: “Step by step, and day by day.”
  1. Delegate. I know it’s hard to say, especially if someone is a perfectionist (like me), but you don’t have to do everything alone. Ask your friends for the exam items, so you don’t have to do them. Or ask your colleagues to help you. Women!!! You don’t have to do all the housework alone. Because your spouses, partner lives in the same house, they can help as well. I don’t say that from now on our other half should do everything, but we cannot die if we ask them from time to time for some help. We will not be less super women, just more clever. Share the housework. Discuss who likes to do what and share. I have bad news: no one is a mindreader, so if you don’t ask, you will never get the help. Just ask. Remember Smarter than harder.

Once we have a bit more time, please use it to get some rest. We will not miss anything if sometimes we do what feels good for us and say no to an event, or we just delay our so-called important obligations. Have some fun. Sometimes, I sit down and brainstorm all the things that I loved to do when I was a kid, and I do at least one item from the list. Fun, joy and happiness make us feel alive. Play like the kids. 

Create boundaries and try to focus on yourself instead of trying to please everyone around you. I know, I said this a million times, but still true: At the end of the day, you will be alone in your bed with your emotions. No one can feel your feelings, not even your partners, friends, family…only you. 

Summertime has so much magic regarding our mental health. Go for a walk in nature, go for a holiday, spend as much time as possible with your loved ones, take a night swim in the lake, go for a horse ride, have a picnic, take a day off and get lost in the woods, just go outside and enjoy the wonder around you. 

So SpitFire Up, and please take care of yourself. Summer is the best time of the year to create new and joyful habits.😘 And if you need more support, book a free 30-minute consultation, and we will see how to continue. ❤

Oh, and please don’t forget: You don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Please follow me here, on Instagram, Facebook, or Pinterest.

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Free workbook❤ Life Coaching

“5 questions that help you find your purpose”

🎁 Free Workbook to Find Your Life Purpose

📍 Many young people are stuck and don’t know where to go next. This workbook will help you start with five questions that will take you deeper. Download it for free here!

👇

“5 questions that will take you closer to your life purpose – Workbook”

🎁 If you would like to talk it over and see the direction more clearly, you can sign up for a 💬 free, 30-minute consultation with me, where we can see how I can support you on your journey.

📩 Sign up by email: kriszti.nyers@gmail.com

📱 Instagram: @kriszti.nyers888, @spiritofspitfires

or any of the places listed in the contact menu.😘

Have fun and have a wonderful day! 😘

Categories
Ingyenes munkafüzet❤

5 kérdés, ami közelebb visz az életcélodhoz

🎁 Ingyenes munkafüzet az életcélod megtalálásához


 📍 Sok fiatal el van akadva, és nem tudja, merre tovább. Ez a munkafüzet segít elindulni – 5 kérdés, ami mélyebbre visz. Ingyenes letöltés itt!

5 kérdés, ami közelebb visz az életcélodhoz- munkafüzet

🎁 Ha szeretnéd átbeszélni, tisztábban látni az irányt, jelentkezhetsz egy 💬 ingyenes, 30 perces konzultációra velem, ahol megnézzük, hogyan tudlak támogatni az utadon.

📩 Jelentkezés e-mailben: kriszti.nyers@gmail.com

📱 Instagram: @kriszti.nyers888, @spiritofspitfires

vagy az elérhetőségek menü pontban megadott helyek bármelyikén.😘

Jó szórakozást és csodás napot! 😘

🤍

Nyers Krisztina

Life Coach – Spirit of Spitfire Coaching

Categories
Blog Egyéb kategória

Inner Teenager

Hello Guys,

Finally, it’s almost Summer!🥰 The flowers are blossoming, the weather is warm, and nature is colourful. What else do we need? Well, so many things, but I am waking up from my “Winter sleep”. I feel the energy!!! 😅 Every Summer feels like the Summers in my teenage years. (Not the prehistoric times, just the wild ‘90s and ‘00s. 😅)

In the past 1,5 years since I moved back to Hungary, almost every single week, I have had at least one realisation regarding me, my actions, reactions, emotions, habits, etc. A few months ago, I went through my pictures. During the process, when I had just found my favourite teenage picture of myself, someone messaged me… and I didn’t like the message.🤷‍♀️ I immediately became very offensive, upset, and insecure at the same time, like the girl in the image. I looked at the picture and realised that the Universe wanted to message me. The message was loud and clear: You acted from your “inner teenager”. Nothing wrong with that if you can catch yourself when you go “back” to that state of your life. The problem starts when you have no idea what inner teenager means or if this state can exist in you. And most of us don’t have. 

Why? Simple. Usually, when we work on ourselves, we focus on the inner child and its wounds or the adult problem-solving and/or trauma healing process. But what about the teenage traumas? I tried to find some literature for this post, but not many authors, psychologists, or scientists discuss the fact that we all had teenage years with all their traumas. We know how adults and our environment’s behaviour shapes us as kids, but what about the years when we are confused and lost? Of course, so many of our traumas are from our childhood, and we are busy focusing on them, but what about the trauma that losing our first love can cause? The trauma that everyone wants us to decide what we want to do for the rest of our life, when we should choose a University right after graduation? What about the traumas that your identity searching can cause, or the pain that is caused by rejection of your age group? No one is talking about these kinds of traumas. 

It’s basic psychology that when the kids turn 11-12 years old, the person of reference is no longer the adults around them. Teenagers no longer care about their parents’ opinions or want to impress their teachers. They don’t want to hang out with their grandparents. The only thing that matters is their age group’s opinion. They start to care about what their friends say, do or how they behave, because they want to be part of the group. That’s why the environment around them during these years is so important. Also, that’s the time when they are not kids anymore, but still not adults. They try to find their identity and figure out who they want to be. An average kid at the age of 18 must graduate from high school and apply to a university. The kids have to decide what they want to do for the rest of their lives. This causes so much pressure, confusion, and these are the age when they start to develop anxiety. If the parents have an imagination of what the kid should become and push it too hard, even worse. I have so many friends who graduated from university with a diploma that they never used, just because that was the expectation from their parents. Lawyers who never practised, financial experts who never worked one day in the financial sector. Only because the parents had their imagination regarding their kids’ future. But they just wanted the best for their children, so I don’t want anyone to blame their parents. They all had good attention. 

I’m sure we all remember our first loves. The butterflies in our belly, the pink clouds and the excitement before a date or even when we see the loved one. All the first dates, first kisses, first handholdings, and don’t be unrealistic, our first sexual experiences. So we felt all these beautiful, happy feelings…but when it ends (and most of the time it ends)… it is the first big disappointment. We cry, we have no idea how to get through to this loss, and everyone around us is just keep telling us that all will be okay, and this was only our first love, and better is coming. Sure…but we don’t know when, and we start to screen ourselves, what is wrong with us. We want to find what we have done wrong. Which is nothing, this is just life, but most of the parents instead teaching the teenagers how to morn a relationship and help them go through the stages, they just smiling and wants them to move on as soon as possible and focus on their studies and career instead of crying about a boy or girl. (Again, it isn’t the parents’ fault or they aren’t evil, they want the best, but no one told them these things either. These are the patterns that they’ve learnt from their parents.)

What about the social media’s effect on teenagers? Competition and bullying. Teenagers are comparing themselves to the influencers, and as they are still not adults, just big kids, they bully each other, but this bullying is online, so the whole world can see someone’s humiliation. Not to mention the fashion trends, and because of the importance of the brands, how much money do they have in their wallets, and the family’s financial situation?

So no one ever speaks about this kind of trauma. People don’t think that this is trauma. They don’t think about how important these experiences are. Unconsciously, we belittle the teenagers’ feelings and thoughts. Yes, these ages are the “drama ages” where they are angrier, their hormones are up and down all the time, and they overexpress themselves, but their feelings are just as valid as any other people’s. 

I think we should, and we could help them to get through these phases easily and quickly with compassion, therapy or with life coaching techniques. There are some easy exercises to help them choose their career path or give them reasons to care. We shouldn’t just let them figure it out alone or decide for them, we just need to listen to them and hold their hands, instead of judging every step they take.

What does it mean to act from your inner teenager? Like every human being, we are all different, and we experience our teenage years quite differently. I would say that when you act like a rebellious 18-year-old, without slamming the doors (or sometimes with the door thing too). I remember when I was a teenager, I was so needy, spoiled by my friends, my ego was bigger than Mount Everest, I was very arrogant, and I sought attention from all the boys around me. I wanted to be a Queen, but to be honest, I acted like a bad Disney princess. So when my inner teenager is out (called X-Tina- I know…so pathetic, but that’s how everyone called me back in the days, because I wanted them to call me like that🤦‍♀️), I realise it immediately because I become needy, hysterical, seeking attention and if I not get it…well, proper B@tch is on duty. (With a capital B!) But all of these reactions are coming from insecurity, loneliness, lack of confidence, envy, and not feeling valued enough. I have been working a lot lately on my teenage traumas; however, some have not yet been solved or properly dealt with. But that’s okay. We’re human, and self-development is a lifelong journey. 

So, how to deal with an uncontrolled teenager? Easy, as you deal with a normal one.

  1. Accept the fact that you’re in your teenage mood. It can be so hard, because we think that after a certain age, we automatically become not just physically, but mentally, adults too. 
  2. Gather so much patience. You’ll need it. 
  3. Identify the problem. “Which button was pushed?” What do you feel? Why do you feel what you feel? 
  4. Try to convince (good luck) yourself that you’re a grown-up now and all those fears are outdated, and let go of them. It can be a very long procedure, and maybe some of them are even deeper than you think, but be patient and take your time. Take as long as it needs.
  5. Go out and celebrate… even like when you were a teenager. 😉

I believe we all have our inner child, inner-teenager, and our adult self inside of us. My opinion is that these three shouldn’t fight against each other, because we need all three to be in our everyday life. We should let them team up and work together to conquer the world. 

So pull out your wild-legged jeans, with a crop top, put Spice Girls on speaker and SpitFire up your inner teen!😘

Oh, and please don’t forget: You don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Please follow me here, on Instagram, Facebook, or Pinterest.

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

Pinterest: @spiritofspitfires

Categories
Events/Események

Fókusz Webinar

Várok mindenkit sok szeretettel 2025. Május 2-án, pénteken, 17.00-tól a Fókuszban a fókusz című előadássorozat első részével Online!

🥰

Ha lemaradtál, vagy nem tudtál személyesen eljönni, semmi gond ugyanis az előadássorozat most már webinarként is elérhető lesz. Minden harmadik pénteken egy-egy újabb résszel várlak benneteket!🥰

Ezekről és még sok más a mindennapi életben egyszerűen alkalmazható motivációs technikáról beszélgetünk az otthonod teljes kényelméből. Amennyiben érdekel a pozitívabb életszemlélet, szeretnéd boldogabbá és kiegyensúlyozottabbá tenni a mindennapjaidat, megtudni hogyan legyél önmagad.

Amiről szó fog esni:

  • Pozitív életszemlélet alapjai
  • Hogyan lássuk szebbnek a Világot?
  • Miért nem megy a teremtés?
  • Mi az amire fókuszálunk?

Ajándék azonnal letölthető prezentációs munkafüzettel!🥰 Ne hagyjátok ki!
Részletekért küldj egy ❤-et üzenetben az alábbi social media platformok vagy az elérhetőségek egyikén!!!!

Facebook: @SpiritSpitfires

Instagram: @spiritofspitfires

És itt van pár kép a pénteki személyes előadásról is! 🙂

XOXO,

Krisz😘😘