Tag: be yourself

“Dearest Gentle Reader!”

Don’t worry, I will not start and never be able to copy the one and only Lady Wistledown, but this letter is addressed directly to you. (Plus I am obsessed with The Bridgertons at the moment.🤣) However, this isn’t the cause I remained silent for this long. I had to make many decisions during the past few months, including whether I wish to continue this blog.

This blog was born because I always wanted to write a blog and continued since I moved back to Hungary to help me keep my English. But this became an update page for the lazy people around me. Many people around me started to ask when I created an update because since I moved home they know less about me than when I lived in London, simply because I posted more while I was back there. And to be honest that’s when I realised that I became a “people pleaser” again. I forget to read and use my post about this subject. ( Well, we learn until we die, I guess. 😅)

Since I started my life at home, unconsciously I came back to my old habits and old patterns which are attached to this country and the life I lived 11 years ago before I stepped foot on British soil. Even most of the people around me think that those years have not made any marks on me or worse, they simply ignore the fact that London changed me a lot, the truth is that I am not the same 23-year-old girl who left back then. So no, I will not pretend that I am she. Some things will never change such as the fact that I will always be a village girl, who speaks too much, laughs loudly and is way too sentimental, but I grow up now. And that’s something that everyone must accept. Of course, this was my fault entirely, I let them deal with me as if nothing happened in the past few years.

I decided to write in Hungarian too because I had enough of the fact that my friends asked me to do so. But honestly, I never wanted to write in my mother tongue. I wanted to improve my English when I started. This blog as I mentioned in one of my first posts is not for you who read it, it is for me who write it. Of course, I intend to help as many people as possible via my stories, and if you make an effort to read them, may or may not you get something.

So no, I will not write in Hungarian in the future, because if you care about what is in this, you can make a small effort and use the Google Translator. And I post when I feel I have time and energy, but not when you want me to. This site will not be an update page for all the lazy ones. I understand it is easier to read what is going on in my life instead of calling, texting, messaging or contacting me in any other form of communication. I still want to help and that is still my mission with this blog, but with my own rules. I do not wish to check the stats that how many people read what I said or constantly wait for some feedback, so I feel approved, loved and precious. My psychology studies reminded me of something. Especially Maslow’s hierarchy of needs pyramid. Maslow argued that survival needs must be satisfied before the individual can satisfy the higher needs. He said we first must satisfy the need for love and belonging or safety before we can do anything with self-actualization. Well, the only problem is that we think (most of the time we even strongly believe) that these needs can be satisfied only externally. I wanted to be loved and feel to belong so I bent my other needs and personality to fit in. And of course, the biggest lie: “ I do not want to hurt anyone.” Let me tell you something, You cannot hurt anyone and no one can hurt you, just like no one able to make you happy or loved, if you do not let them. Every level of the pyramid can and should be satisfied inside of you first and then, you can attract the external too.

I decided to live my life, write my blog and organise my time how it fits ME. If you want to be part of my journey I am so happy and you are more than welcome to read my words and hopefully get some help or at least laugh a bit about my silliness. You can write to me anytime on any platform, but I do not continue to write just for you, Dearest Gentle Reader. Those of you who are my friends or family members, I love you so much and without your support, I would be lost for sure, but if I do not post in 2 months and you want to know what is going on in my life because you care about me, please grab your “very” smart phones and drop a message, anytime. 😘

I know it wasn’t the usual Silly SpirtFiry post, but behind this screen, I am a human too. And as I always telling you: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: I hope, I will be back soon with some funny content about the Life of a Single in Hungary…trust me it matters the country and the city regarding this subject.😅 Love you all!!!

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Tags be yourself, Blog, blogger, blogging, books, it is what it is, life, motivation, my life my rules, people pleaser, positive blogger, self-love, this is me, writer, writing

Egyéb kategória Positive quotes

Motivation

Post author By Kris Spitfire
Post date 2023.04.15.
No Comments on Motivation
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XOXO,

Krisz😘

Egyéb kategória Positive quotes

Success

Post author By Kris Spitfire
Post date 2023.04.12.
No Comments on Success
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XOXO,

Krisz😘

Blog Egyéb kategória

Dolce far niente

Post author By Kris Spitfire
Post date 2023.03.25.
2 Comments on Dolce far niente
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Hello!!!!!

I know it’s been two weeks since my last post and I promised I would share some tools to get out of feeling burnt out, but life happened. Actually, I started to write about the price tags last week and I am almost done so that you can read it soon, but first I wanted to talk about doing something really important from time to time for our perfect healing. It is “Dolce Far Niente”.

I know you are confused and you think I am actually crazier than ever (except if you are one of my Italian friends or readers because I am sure you guys are laughing so hard). That’s okay. I started to learn Italian. Actually, I am very good at the cookies’ names now, which is so hard because I have to try a lot to know about their meanings, but everything for learning.😅 As you all know I love Italy and everything that is Italian, but this came from totally elsewhere. And I confused you more.😅Sorry, this is when ADHD hits during writing. Let me clear the air.

Last Sunday I woke up after a really nice and relaxing sleep and I felt I want to do nothing. Not because I was sad or depressed, no. I actually just wanted to have one PJ day. I haven’t had it since a long time ago and I just felt I want to stay in my bed, watch movies, and not even bother to dress up. Then I felt the guilt. I am sure you all know the feeling. You want to do nothing, but you have miles-long to-do lists. Clean the house, cooks something for dinner, walk the dog, take care of your kids, maybe do some laundry, etc. I know just as my list goes on and on and on and always came new things, as yours too. I was hesitating. I should come out of bed and do my million tasks, because on Monday I will have to go to the office again (okay, I am lying now, because my Monday was off last week, but that’s another different story) and when I arrive home, I feel so tired and the lists of the excuses are the only longer list than my to-do list. So I felt guilty and lazy. I have projects in my life and if I stay one day in my bed, I waste so much time actually doing something to feel better and achieve my goals. (We talked previously about what is the difference between being lazy or you give yourself the necessary time to heal, but we will later on for sure.) I started to panic as well, so total chaos and it was five minutes after I had my coffee. And then the miracle happened. I realized the most important tool I have to share with you first is “Dolce Far Niente”. (Also I have to use it in my life.)

I love Eta, Pray, Love movie, not just because they happened to be in the most beautiful places in the World or because Julia Roberts is one of my favorite actresses…no. I love this movie (and the book too) because it teaches you basic lifehacks. Unfortunately, not all of us can hit the pause button and just quit our life for a year to travel around the world and find ourselves, but if you watch the movie, you can discover so many lessons.

And one of the most important is “the sweetness of doing nothing”. That’s what dolce far niente means. Of course, Italians are the masters of it, but we can learn as well. And if we wish to be healthy we should. I don’t say that you leave your kids behind and go for a weekend alone to rest. Not everyone can afford it or do it, but I say that you should have at least 1-2 hours each week when you don’t do anything and do not feel guilty. If you can have a day even better. To have time with yourself is just as much important then to get the tools and doing the actual work. You have one life, do whatever you like to do, what makes you feel happy. Of course, until you not hurting other people around you. I don’t say you should quit your life, we all have responsibilities but start to think about what you really want, what you enjoy.

You know what? This is today’s tool kit, called brainstorm. Take a piece of paper and write down everything you like in your life. Every single thing that makes you happy. List what makes you excited. Everything. We have five main aspects of our life: Social, financial, mental, physical, and emotional. This is the exercise. So simple. Just write down each category and write next to them what makes you happy. Once it is done, you will feel better and you know where to start your healing process. Circle three things (the most important ones in the category) and start to focus on how you can make them more.

This is how you will enjoy your life, this is how you will enjoy the sweetness of doing nothing. Because you need it. Everyone needs it. So guess what I have done last Sunday? Yes, you are right, nothing and I enjoyed all the minutes of it.😊

We don’t always need to overcomplicate our lives, just listen to your soul/instincts/gut, and it will tell you what you need. And if it says that you need to do nothing…well, who you are to question the big Universe/God/Mother Earth/ All Living? Put your hands on it and enjoy your gelato.

Oh, and don’t forget: Don’t have to be always strong to be a Hero.😘

XOXO,

Krisz😘

P.S.: Any questions, or concerns, please DM me on Instagram, or Facebook or just leave a comment. Love you all!